woah... are those MY finances??

stewby

Aw, happy belated birthday to your nan.
_party_

a 5km run doesn't doesn't sound like any sort of fun to me at all. I wish it did though, would make this healthy living rubbish so much easier.
Guess that's why they call it a challenge, I suppose.


I hate how I have so much enthusiasm but the month seems to go so slow.
I know that sounds stupid but I just want to get the credit card cleared and I hate waiting around for the following month to get another statement. I wander if they would let me have it on the internet.
:undecided

My first £100 is all saved which is brilliant. My mum has it hidden at their house so that I don't know where it is.


My hope is that I can pay off the credit card by December 12th. The plan is to keep chipping away at it each month but to save £100 a month with my mum.
Hopefully by the end of November, there will be less than £1200 left on the credit card and I can use the £700 I have saved and my usual payment to clear it completely.

Then hand the card back to my dad and tell him to never let me touch it again unless I have the money to pay it off.
What do you know... even an eejit like me can learn.
:rotfl:

Fmess

Hi stewby


Welcome back. Glad to hear you are still planning away and are getting rid of the credit card by Christmas, it'll be like an early Christmas present to yourself!

scubaangel

The run was really good fun, lots of people though so there were plenty of walking sections and you pretty much had to walk through the colour zones where the staff were throwing around the powder paint.

I think the month goes slowly for everyone. I know it does for me too.

stewby

I like the sound of the powder paint, especially if it was in mystery colours so I had to complete a km to see what the next colour was... would keep my attention and encourage me to keep going.


Hey fmess!!
Yeah, it's not looking likely but might be a bit more likely since bf is in the bad books.


Going to vent on here so please excuse me:
Went out for a flea cup this afternoon with my mum, auntie and cousin. It was lovely. I didn't pay.
However, the cup of tea was at a lovely farm shop so I bought OH some sauces that he likes. They had them reduced so I went a bit OTT and bought him a lot. I also bought him a couple of real ales (one for him and one for his dad).
I used my own money to pay which came to £27.25 (I know, I was shocked as well).

So... the shopping budget is pretty much dead in the water as I cut how much we could spend as per NSK's challenge.
OH decided we would go shopping for his dad coming up this weekend and we would get some food. He offered to pay.
I came home and we went to morries shopping. He had a list and he picked up a heap of fruit and veg... three different types of tomato for crying out loud!!!!!
I picked up a pack of two donuts which were reduced to 50p and was looking at a pack of four mini baguettes which were reduced to 40p when OH turned round to me and said: "Just remember who is paying for this shopping"
:eek:

I put back the baguettes (which were too hard so I wasn't going to buy them anyways) and handed him 50p for the donuts.
I did tell him in no uncertain terms that I was really unhappy with what he had said and that from now on, I would buy the basics for the house and my food and he could buy his own food and drink.
I was absolutely livid and raging that he could say that after all the money I spend on him.
He pays £200 a month on board and that pays (magically) half the mortgage, half the bills, half the food and drink costs, half the house insurance, half the council tax, etc, etc, etc.
It covers just over half of the mortgage (£371 a month)!!!!! He has no clue how much money it takes to run a house.
:mad:

I was so disappointed in him that I came home and went out walking with my mum so that I could have a bubble and feel sorry for myself.
He knows he has done wrong as he told me that he was feeling guilty now, offered to put the 50p in the campervan pot and offered to take me to tescimos.
I have told him not to bother. To alleviate my anger, I am away to go through my bank account to see how much money I do pay out a month and show him just how lucky he has it.
The angry part of my brain wants to tell him I am upping his board as we need more to live on but then I feel sorry for him as he is paying back a huge loan (bigger than my mortgage) and is trying to pay back his credit card (will take him two months, he doesn't have a lot on it).
:undecided

I know he hasn't been in a relationship before but surely he even understands the whole concept of it being a two way street and there being a bit of fairness and equality??
:mad:

Anyways, sorry for the rant but god, does that make me feel better. Sorry again.
Hugs to everyone.

stewby

To make myself feel better, I have just worked out my maths...

House total = £636.11 (includes monthly gas and electric).
My Monthly total = £379.26 (includes loan, savings and mobile phone).

SUB-TOTAL = £1015.37

Plus, Budget account = £400.00

I earn = £1600 - £2100 (on average, depending on nightshifts and extra shifts).

Leaves me a maximum of £684.63 to throw at credit card. However, my dad is keeping me some money back so that I can pay money off the credit card every month.
:undecided

scubaangel

Hope you've calmed down now, I know it can be incredibly difficult dealing with someone who just doesn't get the costs of running a household - my ex was like that he was so used to paying £50 a month for a room and his bills then only having to buy food after that.

The numbers look good though, as long as the credit cards are coming down.

stewby

I have calmed down a lot... still a wee bitty disappointed though. it's a bad memory to have until it goes in a couple of weeks. The bonus of having a rubbish memory.
:undecided

We spoke about it in bed last night. (I was very sensitive to the fact that he is concerned about his credit card - he has less than £1000 on it but this is a big deal for him).

So the new plan:
* £80 a month is being postponed and possibly being restarted in either August or September depending on his credit card.
We need to start saving this as we will be in charge of the campervan as from next year (including road tax, insurance and garage bills). Dad had wanted to sell it but I love the campervan so convinced him not to. Told him I would have it and pay for it... he has let me keep it for two years whilst he has paid all the bills but has said that when he retires, I am responsible for it.
This is fine with me as I love the bongo, it's so cute and will provide us with cheap holidays round the UK and eventually Europe too.


* Pound-a-day is carrying on. He will pay his share next week. (£61 as we missed June cause we were on holiday).


And the big one... thanks to his big mouth and insensitive comment:
* He is now going to contribute £60 a month to the food budget.

We are both going to put in £60 a month which equals £30 a week which is more than we need to buy all our food and drink (hopefully, unless he goes daft and buys steaks).
:undecided

I am hoping he will agree that any leftover money is to go in the savings pots. But I didn't want to push my luck last night.


I am taking my £80 back out of the pot but am giving £50 to my mum to put in my hidden savings account. I am keeping £30 to get some seed potatoes and to maybe take my mum out for lunch.


I feel like such a drama queen sometimes but when money is such an issue, little thing seem huge.
:embarasse

Hope you are both doing okay.
Hugs.

scubaangel

Sounds like you've made some good agreements there, you can bring up the saving the left over cash at the end of the month - or just not tell him how much is left over and stash it away as a bonus for the other pots (I know that would be my method).

catriona79

stewby wrote: »

I like the sound of the powder paint, especially if it was in mystery colours so I had to complete a km to see what the next colour was... would keep my attention and encourage me to keep going.


Hey fmess!!
Yeah, it's not looking likely but might be a bit more likely since bf is in the bad books.


Going to vent on here so please excuse me:
Went out for a flea cup this afternoon with my mum, auntie and cousin. It was lovely. I didn't pay.
However, the cup of tea was at a lovely farm shop so I bought OH some sauces that he likes. They had them reduced so I went a bit OTT and bought him a lot. I also bought him a couple of real ales (one for him and one for his dad).
I used my own money to pay which came to £27.25 (I know, I was shocked as well).

So... the shopping budget is pretty much dead in the water as I cut how much we could spend as per NSK's challenge.
OH decided we would go shopping for his dad coming up this weekend and we would get some food. He offered to pay.
I came home and we went to morries shopping. He had a list and he picked up a heap of fruit and veg... three different types of tomato for crying out loud!!!!!
I picked up a pack of two donuts which were reduced to 50p and was looking at a pack of four mini baguettes which were reduced to 40p when OH turned round to me and said: "Just remember who is paying for this shopping"
:eek:

I put back the baguettes (which were too hard so I wasn't going to buy them anyways) and handed him 50p for the donuts.
I did tell him in no uncertain terms that I was really unhappy with what he had said and that from now on, I would buy the basics for the house and my food and he could buy his own food and drink.
I was absolutely livid and raging that he could say that after all the money I spend on him.
He pays £200 a month on board and that pays (magically) half the mortgage, half the bills, half the food and drink costs, half the house insurance, half the council tax, etc, etc, etc.
It covers just over half of the mortgage (£371 a month)!!!!! He has no clue how much money it takes to run a house.
:mad:

I was so disappointed in him that I came home and went out walking with my mum so that I could have a bubble and feel sorry for myself.
He knows he has done wrong as he told me that he was feeling guilty now, offered to put the 50p in the campervan pot and offered to take me to tescimos.
I have told him not to bother. To alleviate my anger, I am away to go through my bank account to see how much money I do pay out a month and show him just how lucky he has it.
The angry part of my brain wants to tell him I am upping his board as we need more to live on but then I feel sorry for him as he is paying back a huge loan (bigger than my mortgage) and is trying to pay back his credit card (will take him two months, he doesn't have a lot on it).
:undecided

I know he hasn't been in a relationship before but surely he even understands the whole concept of it being a two way street and there being a bit of fairness and equality??
:mad:

Anyways, sorry for the rant but god, does that make me feel better. Sorry again.
Hugs to everyone.

Hello Stewby,

I've just read your wonderful thread. I think you're an angel re the above. I would have blown my top. Your OH is v lucky to have you. I am glad that you've found a way to make him understand that he needs to contribute more equally. You are a total saint. Hats off.
X

stewby

Hi Catriona.

My parents are an amazing sound board for me and help me cope with a lot of different things which would otherwise get me far too stressed and miserable.
For a while it was work (which is how I ended up in debt) then I moved jobs and it became money (which is how I ended up on here).

My OH (who I do love dearly, despite how grumpy he makes me sometimes) went from living with his parents paying board to living in a house for free whilst he was doing his training then on to living with me so he hasn't had any real experience of running a house.
:undecided

Scuby, I think I will be honest with him and say I want to add it into the pots.
I don't want to hide too many things from him and I already have my secret savings which my mum has hidden in their house so I don't know where it is.
I am not the brightest of people and I tend to find that if I try to hide too many things, I end up tripping myself up and getting into trouble.


Now that OH is contributing to the food budget, I am hoping to save more towards my lump sum in December.
Between you, me and the doorpost (as they say), I am hoping that if my dad sees how well I have done and that I only have a wee bitty left to go (say another £500 or less) then he might pay it off for me and then I would be owe them the money.

I know this sounds like a stupid idea but I owed mum and dad about £1000 before this journey started and my dad has slowly been taking the money back and now I owe them only about £200!!!!
:j

I am so jealous of my dad's ability to deal with money. He is the only breadwinner (my mum was a stay-at-home housewife/mother) and yet he scrimped and saved to pay off the mortgage. My mum quite often speaks about my childhood where me and my brother got a wee toy for behaving whilst they did without any alcohol or bought the cheaper cuts of meat for themselves. We never did without and yet he still manages to achieve so much.
He is currently preparing for his retirement and as a result has started budgeting (like we do), but he is so much more responsible and thinks it through and rationalises it before he spends anything.

He inspires me to do better and to work harder at sorting out my finances.
Even today when we were at a whisky shop, he wanted to buy a bottle of whisky and yet he talked it through in his head, thought about it, rationalised it then decided if he restricted his money next month (him and mum both get £100 a month for treats) then he could get a bottle. He text mum to see what she thought before he then bought the bottle.
Without sounding bad, my dad could afford that bottle of whisky with no problems. It is probably like two hours wages of something to him... but he still thought it through. I want to be like that. I really hope it is something you can learn.
:happyhear

Anyways... nothing like a random chat about nothing in particular to confuse everyone.


Hope you all are doing well. Let me know if you have a diary Catriona so I can have a nosey.
Hugs to everyone.