Living with a partner - how to decide what she should contribute financially?

playaz

Hi - I will be looking to buy a place soon and move in with my partner - we are not married (this is something we plan in the future when it can be afforded).

I would be the definite breadwinner earning almost 3 times my partners salary however as we will be living together how should this work in relation to the bills, mortgage payments etc..

As the mortgage will be in my name only (and not a joint application) I will obviously be the primary person when it comes to paying stuff but it would be fair for her to pay something towards the ongoing costs especially as I'm a FTB and have the initial worry of whether or not I can afford this huge loan for the next 25 years.

Doing some maths - I can expect to be paying around £300 - £400 per month on the mortgage alone (not including any other costs or bills which will obviously vary) - what do people think is a fair percentage for her to contribute to my costs?

If this was a normal random lodger I'd expect them to contribute around £250+ for a room, would people think this is a reasonable amount for her to contribute per month.

It is a little awkward as she is my girlfriend so don't want her to think I'm fleecing her but at the same time she sound realise I cannot be expected to pay for everything...

Phew.. all done.. what does everyone think

P.S I'm looking to buy in the Midlands & have no children if that makes any difference?

Tiglath

As the mortgage will be in your name only, I'd charge her the going rate for sharing a house of that size (£250 sounds reasonable), and half the household bills on top. You can rethink the ratios when you're at the stage of merging your finances further down the line.

BitterAndTwisted

Some couples split all the mortgage and bills 50/50 and some calculate those expenses as a percentage of their take-home pay.

If you are happy to accept that taking any monies from your partner which aren't provably solely C Tax, utility bills and groceries and will therefore be buying your partner a share of the property even though they are not named on the mortgage, what you don't really want to do is make your OH feel that they are just a lodger or visitor in your home.

LEJC

I'm not seeing this from the financial aspect,more the emotional...

Do you want a girlfriend with a view to marriage..or a lodger...because to me the situation seems unclear.

Yes you may well own the property and pay the mortgage and indeed earn more than she does but there are the things that she will bring to the dynamic other than a financial contribution to consider...ie washing housework cleaning etc etc

You are considering marriage...how about not sugesting that she finacially contributes to the house as such but that her money is channelled into a "wedding account" if indeed you are only not choosing to marry until finance will allow...that way you both have a defined pathway for the future and goals to work towards

m0bov

Unless you want her trying to make a claim against the property should you split up, I would not ask her for any "rent" or mortgage as such. Just bills, food, telly etc.. Therefore she has no investment or finanical interest in the property. Also don't take out any joint accounts or credit cards until your ready to marry.

fashionlover10

I earn less than my OH because he works full time and I only work part time. We've split the household expenses so that he pays the rent and I pay the bills and buy the food.

Percentage wise OH is paying less than he 'should' but as he already had debts before we met and needs to use his car for work he has more outgoings than me so I have taken on a higher percentage of the household bills.

You need to make sure you factor in other outgoings before asking her to contribute X amount.

giddypenguin

Have you actually talked to your girlfriend? Going through the numbers together and coming to a compromise you are both happy with is the adult way to decide this - not ask strangers on a forum...

m0bov

The OP is only researching and find out what others have done. No need to flame them.

Dimey

Normally I'd say share everything 50/50 and sign a little written agreement to that effect.

But as you will own the property on mortgage, you are in effect the landlord. In which case for both parties protection I'd do a more formal room rent agreement. I'd look more at what is a fair price for renting a room or house share in your area. Discuss a fair rent with your girlfriend. And go 50/50 on all the other bills.

If/When you get married you can change things.

My advice to your girlfriend would be to be sure she wants to pay rent. She might prefer to buy her own property and spend her rent money on paying a mortgage so she gets something out of it at the end of the day.

Finally, if you both decide to jointly buy the place together - in both names then you simply split the mortgage payments 50/50.

StuC75

as you are buying your own house and earn 3 times more, you may want to consider the wider aspects in this..

Whats the scale of earnings here £10k vs 30k or 30k vs 90k.

Also you claim that your mortgage would be 300-400 per month, and looking for her to contribute £250 -- that seems quite wide of the mark if you are earning 3 times more than here. Surely the mortgage has been worked out on your own affordability and not dependent on having a Girlfriend (which is a far tougher financial commitment than a 25yr mortgage [Tongue in cheek])..

Proportionally you are looking for her to pay more; all without any 'right' to the house - sounds a recipe for disaster. If she was to post such a question on here, a great number would be telling her to avoid it at all costs..

what happens when you normally go out, who pays for what? do you split such costs.. how does the intended £250 stack up to her earnings and affect what she can then afford.

would you also expect her to pay to the upkeep of the house (repairs \ decorating etc) - again this would be 'stupid' on her part to commit to this without an interest in the house..

Mojisola

m0bov wrote: »

The OP is only researching and find out what others have done. No need to flame them.

There's a lot of good reading here - https://www.advicenow.org.uk/living-together/

It's better to be a bit unromantic at this stage than have problems if you split up. If all goes well and you do get married, the situation will change.