Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

FlubM

Alex, I am really really sorry if you thought I was implying that you were just waiting for your lovely parents to shuffle off this mortal coil so you could inherit: I had actually noticed another poster referring to the fact that you might have inheeritance expectations and didn't want you to start thinking like that (I have known people do that almost subconsciously and then had a much tougher time financially than they should have).

Re Christmas expectations, I used to work with a woman whose family had turned Christmas into something approaching an olympic event in its competitiveness. It took her a long time to come to terms with not being able to compete but she eventually decided that it had certainly sorted out those who genuinely cared about her from those who really just wanted to impress. My own financial situation has just nosedived and my lovely family were the first to suggest that we buy each other only token presents (children excepted of course) this year (but I know they will in fact tactfully help me out in other ways): people who genuinely care about you will understand, the rest don't matter.

Hope you get some progress at the doctors.

heartbreak_star

Good luck at the doctor's, Alex...I hope Mrs K. has her say as well - an outside perspective can be very useful regarding treatment.

Don't worry about what others think. At the end of the day you have a wife and son who love you and you love so much in return, a roof over you head and food in your belly.

That alone makes you rich

HBS x

AlexLK

Well, Mrs. K. and I have had a busy morning, so much so that I feel tired already. The budget may have also gone out the window for next Friday evening as my adult pupil called round to give me tickets to see the Halle in Nottingham. I only happened to mention liking one of the pieces on the programme. :rotfl:

Orange Ena: Erm, I hadn't thought about the freezer at that late hour .

So far as the pens / watches go Mrs. K.'s idea was I keep my three favourites but then if I want to buy another item, one of the old ones has to go so the collection doesn't get out of hand.

Mara: That's a great idea. We are considering letting family know our situation in order for them not to EXPECT a lot. My parents don't mind but with all of Mrs. K.'s family Christmas can get expensive.

Wegle: Wish I'd see your post this morning I have done the questionnaire but not printed out, mind Mrs. K. Said her piece, loud and clear! Anyhow, I was there far longer than usual.

Lannie: Just had a look through facebook and the answer is not a lot!

FlubM: Thank you for the clarification re. inheritance. Also we don't really give Christmas gifts to anybody and everybody though Mrs. K. Has a big family.

Heartbreak: See above :rotfl: and thank you.

AlexLK

Finally managed to speak to the awkward creditor and get a response of £25 per month from them and interest frozen for six months.

On another point I am so very angry with Mrs. K.'s employer, as I think they may be trying to take advantage of the fact she enjoys her job there so much. She spoke to the potential new job today with the bigger company, upon discussing my wife's salary (she was honest about her earnings at the current company), the new company is offering £15,000 more (plus a company car and healthcare) than her full time hours package at the current company: only downsides are no leaving at 12.00pm on a Friday (the whole company does at current place), less variety in the work and more site based visits (which can mean nights away).

kissjenn

Hi Alex,

I wouldn't be angry I'd be asking "why".

Sometimes if you've been in a company a while you do become part of the furniture. People coming in new will come in at a higher salary and their external experience will count for more than your internal knowledge.

Also, hard though it is, when you've had a child the harsh reality is that your current employer assumes you'll stay because it's too much hassle to move now you've extra responsibilities.

The potential new job sounds like a promotion and if it includes a car they may well expect a lot of travelling. I'd be inclined to sit down with a sheet of paper, you and Mrs K, divide it into 2 columns and ask yourselves the following for each company...

Salary (and where that is on the payscale)
Holidays
Bonus Package
Car Package
Healthcare Package
Pension Scheme Basis
Shares Package
Working Hours (not on paper - in reality)
Flexibility (working from home, emergency time off for little one)
Location(s)
Nights Away from Home
Promotion Prospects
Training Available
Holidays
And how much the role appeals (if it's boring and exhausting is that the right thing)

On working hours forget any working time directives. The culture may well expect in by 8 - 8:30 and out never before 6. Lunch at your desk and Blackberry availability.

Companies pay for what they expect. They can't ask or demand you do 50 hour weeks in standard contracts, take clients to dinner, work at remote sites until 5pm on a Friday and then fly home but that's the reality when you're in company car, healthcare and £15k payrise world.

I did a year of getting up at 4am on a Monday flying to London and doing the reverse on a Friday getting home at 10pm. My home office was Glasgow - saw it twice!!

Don't be angry...understand exactly what the job entails in reality.

snookey

Alex hope things improve with your mental health .I know what you mean about worrying about your child going through the same in the future but our children have to grow and learn.
Nursery will be good for your son and get him ready for school when the time comes.

AlexLK

We did go to see a nursery today, our son was so surprised to see THAT MANY children his age around. The fee is £20.00 for a morning or afternoon or £37.00 all day (he will not be going all day) to include a "home cooked" meal, which actually looked rather nice.

He is going again on Thursday afternoon next week for a "trial". I honestly feel sick thinking about it but he didn't want to come away. Still, it is in the back of my mind wanting to know WHO these other children are and whether or not our son is ready for this.

I was not particularly impressed with what they deemed as "educational" activities though, nor with the standard they deemed as school ready but we've agreed to try him here (he only needs to book for two afternoons and then move him somewhere else that takes education more seriously).

LannieDuck

Wow, that's an amazing price. I'm in London... we pay £70/day

Don't worry too much about the educational aspects at this point. Just see if he enjoys it. Like you say, you can always look around and find somewhere more educational next year.

AlexLK

kissjenn: Thank you for such a great post. It is almost five years since I have worked in the corporate arena and that was the same place I completed my grad scheme within, so your post is much appreciated.

Mrs. K. currently works in a small company and has been there for eight years now (she completed a graduate programme at a larger firm then moved to the current one). However, she took six months maternity leave when our son was born before going back part time (3 1/2 days), she goes back full time on 30th September.

I've just been through your list with her and the current job (from 30th Sept. when she goes back f/t) looks like so:

Salary (and where that is on the payscale): £40,000 (she should be so lucky to have a "payscale" at her place of work, hahahaha.)
Holidays: 28 days
Bonus Package: n/a (not that type of job)
Car Package: No company car but £0.50 per mile for when she has to take her car somewhere.
Healthcare Package: No
Pension Scheme Basis: She doesn't pay into a pension and has no desire to.
Shares Package: :rotfl: ...
Working Hours (not on paper - in reality): Mon-Thurs 8.30am-5.00pm, Fri 8.30am-12.00pm
Flexibility (working from home, emergency time off for little one): No working from home but they are very flexible.
Location(s): 15-20mins drive to work.
Nights Away from Home: Very, very rarely.
Promotion Prospects: Only to her current superior's role. However, he will be retiring in the next two years and has promised to put a word in for Mrs. K. She also knows the directors very well, one of which has basically told her she would move up to her current superior's position and they would employ somebody for her position.
Training Available: Not really within the company, she does CPD as a part of being Chartered.
And how much the role appeals (if it's boring and exhausting is that the right thing): Loves it as the projects are varied.

AlexLK

LannieDuck wrote: »

Wow, that's an amazing price. I'm in London... we pay £70/day

Don't worry too much about the educational aspects at this point. Just see if he enjoys it. Like you say, you can always look around and find somewhere more educational next year.

£70.00 per DAY??! :eek:

We are going to see how he does next week on Thursday afternoon. Mrs. K. did tell me not to be rude when I said "that's not really educational though, is it?" ....:o