Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

wegle

AlexLK wrote: »

Of course I am going to try but to make no mistakes ever, seems to be asking the impossible.

So you've already decided that you are going to make mistakes. That is a NEGATIVE thought behaviour. The mistakes you make are conscious CHOICES. You need to identify and recognise the emotions that lead you to make mistakes so that YOU can CHOOSE not to make them.

Xx

AlexLK

Thank you all so much for your encouraging posts.

My wife has said that I have wasted far too many good peoples time already, so I understand should you no longer wish to contribute towards my diary. I do want to change, I really do before everything caves in. Whoever it was who said when the inevitable happens one day in the future and I find myself inheriting, I will become a very well off man got me thinking (well, OK I thought about it this evening) that it wouldn't be for long at the rate I have wasted money in the past, my parents have already been very disappointed in me for wasting money.

I don't want to lose my wife or son or home or anything else. I wish I could prove myself to be a useful member of society who doesn't waste money nor put my wife through hell. I wish that I didn't have other problems and that I didn't feel the need to waste so much money in order to make myself feel temporarily "better", yet it was when I'd hardly spent ANY money that things were going well: my marriage was reaching highs we had not seen in years, I was for once being pro-active and hell, Mrs. K. was even "proud" of my achievements.

snookey

Alex you can do this but only if you dont give up. Winston Churchill said if you find your self in hell keep going.
It may be the time now to seek the support of your mum and dad. Im not talking about them bailing you out but for moral support. They must sense something is wrong and Im sure would be more than willing to be a listening ear.
Take care Alex and keep plugging away.

snookey

Mara I disagree with you over his parents I think they will be more disappointed he he does not confide in them and lets things continue as they are.
Alex is not being a drama queen but expressing the way he feels which at the moment is worrying as he sounds more and more depressed. The last thing he needs is condemnation .
Alex keep talking and dont beat yourself up .

HOK3Y

Right, the pity party is over Alex. It's time to go forward. No-one is leaving your diary. We're here to support you not run at signs of trouble and that darn well includes you. So head out of the sand, stop looking at and for the negative, move your focus to the positive. What was it you said the other day: Remember why you are doing this.[\B]

No offense to your parents but your lack of responsibility with money is partially their fault for not teaching you to respect it. Bravo to you for taking steps to learn that before the worst happens because then there would be no second chance. It is so very hard not to give our children everything their hearts desire but it doesn't give them the ability to look at money as a tool. That's what I want for my children. They do not need to have every want filled. They need to respect the money they earn and use it wisely.

Look for the positive, Alex. I think it's telling that you have identified how much better your relationship was when you peeled it back to the simple things - to what really matters. That's a beautiful piece of awareness. X. Look for more. X

HOK3Y

Gosh darn it, where's a cheer leading smiley when you nnnneeeeeeeeeddddd one!

AlexLK

Thank you all.

snookey: Really quite unsure whether to tell my parents anything at this stage or not. Trying to move forwards.

HOK3Y: , I did say that, didn't I? As for my parents, they didn't realise I'd end up like this.

Trying to look on the positive side, Mrs. K. and I have done a mid-monthly review on our finances and found we have done well with keeping the grocery shopping down. We have also been eating much better.

Tomorrow is Mrs. K.'s penultimate half-day Thursday thus we have just spent a little time working out what to do as a family tomorrow afternoon. So far it's a walk (one of son's new favourite things to do), picnic (sat in the back of the LR if it's raining, LOL) and a trip to the library.

snookey

Alex it wont be a step back telling your parents we all need our family even if they dont approve of our choices. Id hate to think that my son held things back just because I might disapprove.
Enjoy your family outing even if its a pretend one in the livingroom. Make a tent out of blankets kids love it. Or is that just me,lol.

AlexLK

snookey: Thank you. However, whilst my wife and I are very close to my parents now before I was in hospital, they had not spoke to me in a few years due to my irresponsibility. So, yes, I'd rather not lose them again.

Not thought of making a "tent" out of blankets ... :rotfl:, mind we are used to rain here and got a bit of making up to do with son, he was disappointed we did not go out of the house today as the weather was nice and he seems to love going for walks and to our neighbours house to see their sheep / dogs.

snookey

Sorry Alex I didn know that. At least you have people on here who will listen and hopefully not judge.

Im more childish than my ten year old daughter or so she keeps telling me.Other peoples children seem to like me though I wounder why,lol.