Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

stepuptothepl8

AlexLK wrote: »

How do you think it would affect him being part of the school community? Apparently my mother used to go home from a similar village school for lunch and had friends. They don't seem to do much during lunch as the extra curriculars are after school.

It's the learning to rub along with the other children, the eating meals with them, chatting while they eat, sorting out their plates afterwards, going to play together - these are crucial little steps in child development, and learning these sorts of social skills will greatly benefit almost all children. Initially of course, if your son wants to, bring him home for lunch, but I think after a while he'll want to be there so as not to miss out on the fun.

As for how it will affect him to be part of a school community - I think he'll learn all sorts of wonderful, amazing, exciting things, just as any reception class child will. He will grow in independence, while relying on you and Mrs K for support. He'll learn how to make friends, how to help other children, how to please his teacher. In short, he'll have a brilliant time. You'll soon know if he's not happy. But I'm guessing he'll enjoy it immensely.

AlexLK

stepuptothepl8 wrote: »

It's the learning to rub along with the other children, the eating meals with them, chatting while they eat, sorting out their plates afterwards, going to play together - these are crucial little steps in child development, and learning these sorts of social skills will greatly benefit almost all children. Initially of course, if your son wants to, bring him home for lunch, but I think after a while he'll want to be there so as not to miss out on the fun.

As for how it will affect him to be part of a school community - I think he'll learn all sorts of wonderful, amazing, exciting things, just as any reception class child will. He will grow in independence, while relying on you and Mrs K for support. He'll learn how to make friends, how to help other children, how to please his teacher. In short, he'll have a brilliant time. You'll soon know if he's not happy. But I'm guessing he'll enjoy it immensely.

I hadn't really considered he'd be missing out on what I remember usually happens at school lunchtime until you pointed it out. This likely sounds a bit selfish but I can't say I'm particularly looking forward to having to schedule everything around him coming home from school every lunchtime but he doesn't enjoy nursery so I'm concerned about how he'll cope. My wife thinks he should be there at lunch and let him be upset for a few weeks but I'm willing to make the time for him. I do agree he's got lots to learn about forming friendships with his peers and how to please somebody that isn't his father.

Unfortunately, I don't think there's a lot he'll learn academically as I write my own curriculum which has already covered most reception class material. By September his writing, reading and maths work should have already surpassed reception level work. Currently his music is a long way ahead as he can confidently read treble and bass clef, identify the instruments of the orchestra and play simple pieces on violin and piano. He loves being outdoors and learning about the outdoors too. The village school appeals as it's so small, they allow children to do work from other year groups, though they have refused to acknowledge him as a "gifted and talented" child before he has attended.

maman

AlexLK wrote: »

I've sort of already made promises that he'd have lunch ready upon getting home and we'd have a quick ten minutes on violin and piano before going back. It is one of the reasons why he's keen on the village school.

How do you think it would affect him being part of the school community? Apparently my mother used to go home from a similar village school for lunch and had friends. They don't seem to do much during lunch as the extra curriculars are after school.

I know you're only trying to do your best for him Alex and protect and please him to an extent, but there's so much more to school than the formal curriculum. There's education jargon that calls it the hidden curriculum but I'm really thinking specifically of the social side of schooling. Most children I know, not only want to be there at lunchtime but well before school so that they can play with other children.


As he's going to such a small school I'm sure they'll assess where he's at academically very quickly and take it from there. The days of 'one size fits all' schooling are long gone. But he will need time to settle socially. From what you've said he enjoyed nursery last year and this year his main problem is that his friends have moved on. At school he'll have an opportunity to make new friends. He also spends a large amount of his time with adults. When he starts do tell his teachers about how he's not that keen on going to school/nursery and what you think the reasons may be. They need to help him settle and socialise not just move on academically.


If you think about it, he really needs to develop this sort of independence to prepare him for larger groups in the future whether that's private or state schools or just life in general.:)

AlexLK

maman: Thank you for your reply.

You are right about the nursery issues, his friends left for school and despite saying they would keep in contact, they didn't. Just as I was expecting, really.

I don't want him to get hurt by the thoughtlessness of others.

gallygirl

AlexLK wrote: »

I don't want him to get hurt by the thoughtlessness of others.

He will though Alex. The sooner he learns it's a normal part of life the better really .

AlexLK

gallygirl: It's upon realising things like this I wonder whether it is fair to bring new life into the world.

gallygirl

AlexLK wrote: »

gallygirl: It's upon realising things like this I wonder whether it is fair to bring new life into the world.

Too late now dear, best make the most of it . Seriously, stop over-thinking things (which is easier said than done I know!)

AlexLK

gallygirl: I understand, though it doesn't stop me from wanting to ensure that my son always knows I will try my best for him. Something I dread is him turning out to be like me.

I suppose my personal problems make me philosophise.

cte1111

AlexLK wrote: »

Even not taking my personal feelings into account, I doubt you would want the input of somebody that not so long ago asked me if Homer was Latin? :mad::rotfl::eek:

Oh heavens, how could anyone dare to have an opinion who doesn't have a full working knowledge of the classics?

TBH I think they were probably trying to take an interest in what you are interested in, you could perhaps have taken the chance to help them learn a bit more and build more of a bond with your inlaws, instead you take the opportunity to sneer at them and store it up to use as a handy excuse to ignore their opinions.

I'm not saying you should do what they say, any more than you should automatically do what your parents would like, but writing them off as you do because (insert snobby excuse of choice, e.g. their house is shabby, they have other grandchildren (? surely this gives them more experience and therefore more validity to their opinions), they don't know who Homer is) is not helpful. It must make your wife feel like you also write her off for similar reasons, not great for anyone's self esteem.

Re coming home for lunch, my husband and his brother came home for lunch every day when they were at primary school. I think they were very much in the minority then, which was over 30 years ago. When your Mum was at primary school, it must have been a little more than that even, so think this went out of fashion over the last 60 years or so. I don't think any children at my kids' primary school come home for lunch, although some might have done in the early years, I don't know any families that did this.

heartbreak_star

Catching up after a few days AWOL with a bug

I agree with much of what cte1111 says above, Alex - I can rattle off various tissue and cell markers, staining techniques, titration procedures and cell culture methods but certainly don't care if other people can't.

I happen to know the stories of Homer, but only through my hobby - when it comes to historical-esque literature I'm more of a Celtic legends/myths woman. It doesn't make me any less intelligent. Be careful you don't belittle Mrs K. via her family.

*steps off soapbox*

I think the lunches thing is something you're going to have to play by ear (no pun intended). I liked coming home for lunch for a while, but kind of gently eased into school lunches via a book club that I could only be part of if I stayed on the premises You've said it's a small school so chances are they'll be happy to work with you.

HBS x