Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

brizzledfw

Hi Alex

Pleased to see Ebay is going well..I still haven't got around to listing my 5 items:o ...on the Brizzle household to do list for next few days...

Can you get some more stuff listed?

Brizzle

pebbles88

AlexLK wrote: »

pebbles: It is not just my parents wishing to send him to prep school, I do too. With regards to my wife's thoughts on the matter, she is not going to be of the attitude it's a bad thing, just an expensive one..

Sorry Alex, I don't think you've got what I meant there.

A unilateral decision is/has/will be made for her son, regardless of what she thinks. As even if you both can't afford to send him, your parents will. When really- it has nothing to do with the grandparents what school he goes too. ( the my parents won't see their only grandchild go to state school - made me :eek::eek:)

She may have more feelings on it that you ( or she herself ) realise.
(We woman can be peculiar creatures remember )

Just please make sure that little k's schooling isn't going to add to the distance between you two. Talk to her, as Robin said, that statement on his schooling, really could lead to irreparable damage to your marriage, please please talk to her. X

X

AlexLK

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Aww tiring usually means enthusiastic though! My junior squad tire me out but it's great when they hit a new stunt. I just shout at the seniors

HBS x

This one is certainly "enthusiastic". :rotfl: However, I do know where you are coming from, it is good to see progression.

brizzledfw wrote: »

Hi Alex

Pleased to see Ebay is going well..I still haven't got around to listing my 5 items:o ...on the Brizzle household to do list for next few days...

Can you get some more stuff listed?

Brizzle

Ah, you're still here!

Thank you and yes, I've other things to list which is one of the things on the ever growing "to do" list for tomorrow.

pebbles88 wrote: »

Sorry Alex, I don't think you've got what I meant there.

A unilateral decision is/has/will be made for her son, regardless of what she thinks. As even if you both can't afford to send him, your parents will. When really- it has nothing to do with the grandparents what school he goes too. ( the my parents won't see their only grandchild go to state school - made me :eek::eek:)

She may have more feelings on it that you ( or she herself ) realise.
(We woman can be peculiar creatures remember )

Just please make sure that little k's schooling isn't going to add to the distance between you two. Talk to her, as Robin said, that statement on his schooling, really could lead to irreparable damage to your marriage, please please talk to her. X

X

pebbles: Thank you for your post but in all honesty I am not going to change my mind about my son's schooling. Mrs. K.'s opinion is no more valued than my own, mother or not and has nothing to do with our marriage for she knew my views on such things before she decided to become a part of my family.

I do not see how my son's life has nothing to do with his grandparents (yes, I unfortunately count both sides)? In my parents' case, he is their only grandchild who will one day inherit their estate. Thus, it is imperative they are aware of and involved in his upbringing.

dawnybabes

But utimatly he is yours and mrs ks son. Yes your family have views but are her families views any less valid.

Quire frankly if my DH family told me he had to do something with my son I'd tell them to butt out. And expect my DH to back me, his wife.

pebbles88

AlexLK wrote: »

pebbles: Thank you for your post but in all honesty I am not going to change my mind about my son's schooling. Mrs. K.'s opinion is no more valued than my own, mother or not and has nothing to do with our marriage for she knew my views on such things before she decided to become a part of my family.

I do not see how my son's life has nothing to do with his grandparents (yes, I unfortunately count both sides)? In my parents' case, he is their only grandchild who will one day inherit their estate. Thus, it is imperative they are aware of and involved in his upbringing.

Ok Alex, we'll have to agree to disagree, I'm honestly quite shocked at this post, all the various very good advice you've had on this thread , & the amazing changes you've made & how much you've learned about yourself & life, & yet it all still it comes back to the subject of inheriting estate & the control that you are allowing people to have over you. You 'unfortunately' count his maternal grandparents.... :eek:

Ultimately, marriage is very much about opinions & every action that anyone takes, has the ability to change a marriage, no matter how big or small.


Whatever happens Alex, I hope all of you find happiness, through whatever form & through the changes that lead to it, be it all together, or apart. Take care, x

pebbles88

dawnybabes wrote: »

But utimatly he is yours and mrs ks son. Yes your family have views but are her families views any less valid.

Quire frankly if my DH family told me he had to do something with my son I'd tell them to butt out. And expect my DH to back me, his wife.

^^^ this :T
Much more better put than I managed!

Iwillsucceed_2

Hi Alex!

I do understand why you want to send your kid to a private school but you have not the means yet! Do you? Relying in mummy's and daddy's bank for his fees is not setting him a good example is it?

Well, it wouldn't surprise me your wife even before marriage liked spending money in cars, clothes and holidays? Under your premise then... I guess you will have to put up with her hence this is how she was slways before even meeting you... Great! :-)

Anyway, what are the two things you are going to do today for you and your business to move you forward?
Have a positive day!

AlexLK

dawnybabes wrote: »

But utimatly he is yours and mrs ks son. Yes your family have views but are her families views any less valid.

Quire frankly if my DH family told me he had to do something with my son I'd tell them to butt out. And expect my DH to back me, his wife.

Mrs. K.'s parents have 6 grandchildren including my son. They have a greater involvement in the other 5 grandchildren's lives.

This is not just about what my family want but what I want to happen too. My son will be better off in a prep school, he is very able for his age and I would like to see him in an environment which will nurture his abilities rather than stifle them.

pebbles88 wrote: »

Ok Alex, we'll have to agree to disagree, I'm honestly quite shocked at this post, all the various very good advice you've had on this thread , & the amazing changes you've made & how much you've learned about yourself & life, & yet it all still it comes back to the subject of inheriting estate & the control that you are allowing people to have over you. You 'unfortunately' count his maternal grandparents.... :eek:

Ultimately, marriage is very much about opinions & every action that anyone takes, has the ability to change a marriage, no matter how big or small.


Whatever happens Alex, I hope all of you find happiness, through whatever form & through the changes that lead to it, be it all together, or apart. Take care, x

Thank you. Yes, we will have to agree to disagree. It doesn't "all" still come back to inheriting my parents' estate or some notion of perceived status at all. This is about doing the right thing by my son.

My wife unfortunately doesn't understand what our priorities should be at this moment in time.

Iwillsucceed wrote: »

Hi Alex!

I do understand why you want to send your kid to a private school but you have not the means yet! Do you? Relying in mummy's and daddy's bank for his fees is not setting him a good example is it?

Well, it wouldn't surprise me your wife even before marriage liked spending money in cars, clothes and holidays? Under your premise then... I guess you will have to put up with her hence this is how she was slways before even meeting you... Great! :-)

Anyway, what are the two things you are going to do today for you and your business to move you forward?
Have a positive day!

Hi Iwillsucceed,

If we make necessary sacrifices we have the means. As for relying on my parents' money, well considering my father was 50 when I began school, I do not see a problem. Yes, my wife and I probably had our son a little too young, though I do not regret that choice, it has made providing for him more difficult.

Yes, Mrs. K. liked spending money on the aforementioned things before we met, in fact we both did. I've only changed somewhat because I've had to, she needs to realise she needs to as well.

There's eBay and starting to write some content for the website today.

heartbreak_star

AlexLK wrote: »

This is not just about what my family want but what I want to happen too. My son will be better off in a prep school, he is very able for his age and I would like to see him in an environment which will nurture his abilities rather than stifle them.

AARGH! I was (am?) intelligent enough that my Mum put me forward for Mensa. She didn't like how the kids in Mensa centres were treated so it never went any further, and I went to a state school. I was NOT stifled. I could read fluently before I was two, apparently (I don't remember, I just can't ever remember NOT being able to read ), and do simple sums and tell the time by that age as well. I was incredibly able, and have a career using my brain now as well as thriving hobbies.

Prep school is not the be-all and end-all, and this is probably the only thing I would agree with Mrs K. on

She does seem incredibly spendy and I think the only way she will change is if something drastic happens (loss of job or credit lines cut off). I hope it doesn't come to that though

Hurrah for eBay and website content That reminds me, I must update the squad site...

Hope the eBaying is paying off and that you all have a great weekend

HBS x

gallygirl

It's not just the school fees though Alex, is it? What about:

• Uniform
• Extra-curricular activities
• Weeks away
• Better get a new car so you don't show him up in front of the other parents
• Better move as well so they don't look down on you.

Just how much will they be prepared to shell out? You're very insecure - how long before you start feeling judged because you're lacking the last two?


Also what would you do if your parents changed their will and bypassed you, leaving everything in trust for Little K? How would your plans for the future pan out then?