Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

daisystar

Hi Alex! I thought I should pop in on you after you were so helpful on my diary


You seem to be doing brilliantly, keep hanging in there. As for weekends.....this is where we struggle too. Its quite hard for it not to feel like drudgery and deprivation when you are used to spending money without really thinking, and we've found it requires more inventive planning and thought to fill the days with cheaper activities that we actually want to do.


I'm not going to suggest a list of 'things to do' because every family is different, and I think one of your main challenges with this will be getting Mrs K on board, so my specific suggestions probably won't be helpful for you guys. We have found it helpful to keep a (very) small budget for actually enjoying ourselves, so that if we decide to do lunch or something it doesn't mess everything up. The other thing that we have really enjoyed and that helps us feel like we're doing something with our weekends is plan one day around something our son would like to do. I also hate soft play and things like that so we decided to act like tourists in our local area and try loads of different new places to take the boy. We take it in turns to choose and the other one has to go along with it - its been fab and I've been loads of places I would never have thought to go We literally pick up loads of tourist leaflets and take it from there.

AlexLK

Hi Daisy,

Thank you. In all honesty I could do with a bit of cheering up this evening. My wife has spent the best part of £1,000 this afternoon and to say I'm not happy would be putting things mildly. I am aware that likely makes me a hypocrite but I've been really trying with this for a long time now.

I wish my wife would be open to suggestions of enjoying the countryside around us as both my son and I enjoy the great outdoors. The tourist in your own county idea sounds like great fun, I'm sure my son and I will do that sometime.

slowlyfading

Do you know what she's spent it on?

AlexLK

A new jacket, a handbag, a pair of shoes and some clothes for our son. The latter I do not begrudge in the slightest, the former somewhat irks me considering she pledged to cut down her spending also. :mad:

brizzledfw

Hi, just popped over from Daisy's diary and have subscribed.

Eek! That's some bill from those items...just p&ssed is what I would be too. Hang on in there..but agree she needs a LBM..even a flicker would be fab. Is Mrs K still in charge of the finances.

Take care

Brizzle

AlexLK

Brizzled: Hello and welcome to the mad house.

Both my wife and I have rather expensive tastes but we also have lots of clothes, some have never been worn. She and I agreed to stick to a budget of £150 per month between the three of us from now for the foreseeable future. Furthermore, she is saving more or less every penny she can towards a car deposit, so I know this will have been put on credit.

Mrs. K. is in charge of the finances now as she earns a much greater salary than I.

AlexLK

Saturday 1st March, 2014.

Dear Diary,

On days like this, everything seems as if it is all so difficult and never going to repair itself. Yet, I am not going to give up, nor crawl into a pit of despair because I am now aware I can do better than that. Money is nothing but arbitrary numbers printed onto rather small, rectangular pieces of paper and one should not be defined by such shallow means.

Yours Faithfully,
Alex.

maman

AlexLK wrote: »

In all honesty I could do with a bit of cheering up this evening. My wife has spent the best part of £1,000 this afternoon

:eek::eek::eek: !!!!!! Alex, that's ridiculous!!


IMO that's crazy but I suppose it's her money and her choice. You've always implied that you got into debt on your own and need to get out of it on your own. Personally, if you were my husband I'd want to help rather than fritter money away on conspicuous consumption which I find all rather 'Essex Girl'. I suppose all you can do, get yourself debt free by selling things and saving from your earnings in music teaching and your other business interests and then you each live, going forward, according to your means.


If I were you I'd defer Little K's private schooling for a few years and at least send him to a state infants school. Beyond that it would depend on the calibre of schools in your area. That would give you a bit more time to get on an even keel financially before you had to spend out on him. As someone said yesterday, it's more than just fees, even the uniforms and meals tend to be more expensive than the average state school.


I can't help much with how to enjoy weekends. We don't have children at home any more so are happy with cooking nice meals at home, good wine and good company. Tonight we've been to the theatre but only local community theatre for live music (very downmarket 60s stuff ) so quite cheap.


Who's cooking the beef tomorrow?

pebbles88

Oh Alex, I can't believe she's done that. I'm so sorry.

daisystar

Oh Alex, no wonder you needed cheering up

I honestly think you are doing brilliantly in the circumstances, to keep your motivation going when Mrs K spends like that just shows your strength. Please keep posting on here as you will need the support, it can feel like a rough road when your OH is on board so when they aren't it can be even tougher. Stick with it though, you are honestly doing great

And yep, try the weekend tourist thing even if your wife won't get involved, our weekends haven't all been outdoors and countryside during this wet weather but the ones that DH chooses tend to be - I never want to go but then always end up (grudgingly) enjoying myself