Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

EchoDelta

Hi Alex,

What they all said about your folks!

The only person that *really* has to approve of you is YOU!

Sorry to hear about the expenses but big yourself up for keeping track. I suspect the old you would have looked the other way.

X

mum2one

Glad your ok, been worried about you.

As for your parents, maybe things came to a head for a reason, that your different people, different views and experiences. Use this time to clear your head and decide what way you want to move forward. xx

AlexLK

Echo: Thank you. I will likely never approve of me but that doesn't mean I cannot try to do the best by my family. The money situation is awkward, something that could quite easily cause a big falling out between Mrs. K. and I. Therefore, I do not particularly want to dwell on it (maybe that is why I haven't been able to face posting on here for a few days).

mum2one: Thank you. In lots of ways you're right, we are very different people, my parents and I. However, I do not know where this will end this time.

EchoDelta

Bless your heart Alex. You can be so hard on yourself! One day at a time and keep talking to Mrs K.

AlexLK

Saturday 25th January, 2014.
Day 150.

Dear Diary,

First of all I apologise for not having kept up with this diary. My excuse of being busy is only half true, for whilst I have been busier than usual I have not been so busy that I were unable to keep this diary up to date. In reality I have been struggling to come to terms with things, including this diary.

I have spent money frivolously, looking back over the past couple of weeks. I can see that now. I have also been failing to cope, the moment I stop being busy in some way or another I'm in a very dark place. On the upside we have a spotless house, all the cars have had their scheduled maintenance ahead of time and my son has some new toys to play with. Perhaps this keeping busy lark is not so bad after all, just completely exhausting.

Unfortunately, I've nothing to report on the debt busting front.

Yours Faithfully,
Alex.

PippiShortsock

Hi Alex

I'm very sorry you're struggling again, both with your mood and the debt busting. However, there are glimpses of the fighting spirit you've demonstrated over the last few months in this diary.

If you can't report anything on the debt busting front, perhaps you could share some ideas with us about how you're going to get back on track in your diary? After all, you still owe a substantial amount and until you've cleared it, you can't really sort out the things which matter for you and your family - like a warm and waterproof house and an anxiety-free approach to resourcing your lives together.

Don't let a minor setback send you completely off track!

Pippi

AlexLK

Pippi: Thank you for your message. Today has been especially difficult for me.

I'm terribly guilty for not being able to provide my wife with all that she wants. Every time she mentions something one of her colleagues and friends have done that we cannot afford to I feel I have completely and utterly failed her, even though I don't say anything, she knows. For I cannot stand to hear her tell me about somebody moving to a bigger house or someone else that has just bought a new car or even one of her friends booking a nice holiday. When I see other fathers picking up their children in expensive, shiny new 4x4s I fear that I am failing my son. It never stops.

No real idea how to move forward from here at the moment.

mum2one

AlexLK wrote: »

Pippi: Thank you for your message. Today has been especially difficult for me.

I'm terribly guilty for not being able to provide my wife with all that she wants. Every time she mentions something one of her colleagues and friends have done that we cannot afford to I feel I have completely and utterly failed her, even though I don't say anything, she knows. For I cannot stand to hear her tell me about somebody moving to a bigger house or someone else that has just bought a new car or even one of her friends booking a nice holiday. When I see other fathers picking up their children in expensive, shiny new 4x4s I fear that I am failing my son. It never stops.

No real idea how to move forward from here at the moment.

You do provide, yes someone on the school run may have a nice shiny 4 x 4, but penny to a £1 there a great big stonking bank loan behind it.

As for houses, a lot of people stay put,

Holidays - I am sure you have had some good holidays, I bet there have been years when the other people haven't gone.

Your not failing anyone,
You have a roof over your head
You have food in the house
You have warmth and light
You have a lovely wife and son
You have a successful business
How many cars are there????? 5 soon to be 6

Ignoring the debts - theres a fair bit of the finds going on these cars???

if you scratched below the surface I bet you would find there are plenty of cracks and plenty of credit cards etc floating around in those houses.

---
Your debts - the first two were cleared fast, now the others are a slower pac, but don't lose sight of how much you paid out, and this still can be done, if you want a holiday it has to be budgeted for, - I've lost count of car boots, table tops, ebay, selling sites to get rid of extras in the house, clothes DD has grown out of etc - this is because I want the holiday, its been tough it still will be, but when we've been / going it makes me and DD really grateful and apricate the experiences were getting - as we've done it to get there xx

7roland8

Well said mum2one.

Alex - you will probably never be able to give your wife all she wants - not because you won't be earning enough - but for soe people their material possessions and holidays etc are never enough - so if you had four holidays a year someone else will always have five or six - or a bigger house of a newer and more expensive car.

The thing is to work on being content with what you have.

Maybe she is just making conversation and does not realise what she is saying - but if she is saying these things deliberately to hurt and upset you that is downright cruel.

People will always have more than you - even if you had millions - so that will never bring you contentment - while a walk in the woods with your son or feeding some ducks with cheap bread can.

Mara_uk7

Alex, Since your wife has such a great wage and "spare" money, Why doesnt SHE take her family (you & little K ) on holiday instead of whinging ?