Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

gallygirl

Then spend it all on pens and I hope they make you happy.

slowlyfading

Again with your income - you earn a lot! Combined, eventually if you put your mind to it, could save enough for a deposit on an investment home. Me and DH earn less than you, and that's what we're aiming.

The sad thing is, I don't think you'd be happy if you were debt free.

AlexLK

gallygirl: You really are obsessed with my pen collection. :rotfl:

slowlyfading: I do not earn a lot at all. Even if I managed to sort that issue out and the debts, one property is going to be a bit of a waste of time. One turns into more is the argument, of course. However, I've not got the commitment to keep reinvesting, the calling for an Aston Martin or XK120 is far too strong and I know it.

Don't really want to keep relying on the Bank of Mum and Dad as well, let's face it at my age it's starting to get a bit pathetic.

So far as happiness goes, I likely wouldn't.

slowlyfading

AlexLK wrote: »

slowlyfading: I do not earn a lot at all. Even if I managed to sort that issue out and the debts, one property is going to be a bit of a waste of time. One turns into more is the argument, of course. However, I've not got the commitment to keep reinvesting, the calling for an Aston Martin or XK120 is far too strong and I know it.

Why would it be a waste of time? It would be relatively passive income and something to sell later on. We're aiming for one property, as I can't and don't want to be chasing around various payments. I don't see it as a waste of time, but obviously we differ here

Why on earth do you want a fancy pants car? Yes, they might be nice to drive, yes they look good, but in all honesty, why do you want one? Is it so you can "look the part"? There's an article somewhere about the old rich millionaires who drive old banger cars, dress in "normal" clothes and make do and mend. Not everyone who is rich drives status symbols.

(Can't believe you're not happy with your land rover, I'd love one of those! And yes, to most people they are an expensive car. Just not to you )

Don't really want to keep relying on the Bank of Mum and Dad as well, let's face it at my age it's starting to get a bit pathetic.

Hmm... you said it.

So far as happiness goes, I likely wouldn't.

That is sad you need to work out why this is; material things only keep you happy for so long. If you're not happy with yourself, your life will never get easier. You will always feel like you can do better, be better and feel inadequate the rest of the time. I learnt this the hard way, but I came out the other side. Are you still going to counseling?

LannieDuck

I can't believe you've spent some of the money you saved towards your debt. What a waste of all the effort you've gone to.

Get the £^@% debt paid off and you can start a-fresh. Pick one of the debts that's with the original creditor and pay £13k minus the money for your second F&F, plus half of your xmas money.

Get it out of your accounts and away from your spending habits. You can spend again once you've out of debt. Which won't be very long... unless you're going to keep frittering the cash away. In which case I'm not sure what we're all doing here.

7roland8

This is a gloomy time of year after Xmas and people often get to feel low.

However you have been doing marvellous Alex - you have already got half the money to clear your debts - but do pay it of NOW.
Don't think of it as 'your' money - just pay it of and you will feel so much better.

Then in a few months if you have done the same the debts will be all gone and you can start afresh - whatever that may be.

Oh yes knew there was something else - money coming into the home is just money - doesn't matter who earns it - one of you needs to be there and responsible for your son - so does it matter which one? Looks like you are the most maternal one anyway - in the nicest possible way.

gallygirl

LannieDuck wrote: »

Get it out of your accounts and away from your spending habits. You can spend again once you've out of debt. Which won't be very long... unless you're going to keep frittering the cash away. In which case I'm not sure what we're all doing here.

I agree Lannie.

Basically, what I can see happening is all the money raised, and recently gifted, is frittered away on toys/status symbols.

Then there will be a serious problem with the house - boiler going or something. Alex will turn to mummy and daddy and get bailed out once more.

I for one won't be here to see it. I'm unsubscribing.

Sedge123

AlexLK wrote: »

Mara / gallygirl: To be honest paying things off is not really on my mind at the moment and I'm starting to get attached to the money I've saved, which isn't as much as it once was.

The thing is though- it's not "your" money that you have saved when you have debts like you do !

Iwillsucceed_2

Hello Alex!

I am not sure how I feel about your reluctance to pay off some of your debt with the money you've saved! I am angry!!! I think I want to shake off your head off so you can understand what the other members are trying to convey when they agreed you to pay off some of your debt!! Grrr! Grrr! Argh! Argh!! Ha ha ha! Ok! I have calmed down! :-)
By the way! Sometimes when I read your ups and downs I cannot stop imagining you as a tortoise :-) who goes slowly and slowly sometimes so lethargic and withdraws in its case/shell when it's to much! I guess this apathy, lethargy, luck of energy and being soooo NEGATIVE! Regurgitating always! in the past! hopeless about the future with no light at the end of the tunnel in their life such as the one you at times convey, can only be the result of your depression? It's dreadful! :-( this time of the year can only worsen if you are having one of those days and cloud all possibilities of seeing a hopeful tomorrow ... Blah, blah...
You were seeing a counsellor weren't you? In all honesty, we all think you can benefit from one! However, I do not know what is best for you, though I can see that you don't seem to be ready for a counsellor? Particularly when you'd a bad experience previously?
I also think you could benefit much more from a cognitive behaviourist therapist specifically !! But you know what is best!
On another note, you keep saying: 'money is not what it was once, that you use to have better life?'.... Isn't your debt the result of your bad spending habits? Are you sure you were able to afford your collection of pens without resorting to credit cards in the first place? I am just assuming! You had the money, you had great time just like many other people do! I.e. DEBT! It appears to me that we can all have money, expensive holidays, expensive taste, etc, etc that all goes into our credit cards... I would like you to stop to think about where your debt come from in the first place? Then you can answer whether 'you had the money'!!
I guess as you have noticed, 'we', me and then... Are becoming rather intolerant with you? we would like you to pay your debt off please! ASAP! Hahaha! You know best but nevertheless, i, we do care about you!

Regards,

AlexLK

slowlyfading wrote: »

Why would it be a waste of time? It would be relatively passive income and something to sell later on. We're aiming for one property, as I can't and don't want to be chasing around various payments. I don't see it as a waste of time, but obviously we differ here

Why on earth do you want a fancy pants car? Yes, they might be nice to drive, yes they look good, but in all honesty, why do you want one? Is it so you can "look the part"? There's an article somewhere about the old rich millionaires who drive old banger cars, dress in "normal" clothes and make do and mend. Not everyone who is rich drives status symbols.

(Can't believe you're not happy with your land rover, I'd love one of those! And yes, to most people they are an expensive car. Just not to you )

Hmm... you said it.

That is sad you need to work out why this is; material things only keep you happy for so long. If you're not happy with yourself, your life will never get easier. You will always feel like you can do better, be better and feel inadequate the rest of the time. I learnt this the hard way, but I came out the other side. Are you still going to counseling?

Everybody's situation is different, as I will some day inherit 12 properties, buying another is not really going to make much of a difference.

The car thing has little to do with driving a status symbol, it's simply a hobby which got out of hand. I started collecting models when young (still got them), which spiraled into real cars the moment I hit 17. I am happy with the Landy, always had multiple cars, different ones for different jobs.

I'm not sure I can work this out. Still having counselling but not been for a couple of weeks - I'm not sure it's helping much but willing to give it until Easter.

LannieDuck wrote: »

I can't believe you've spent some of the money you saved towards your debt. What a waste of all the effort you've gone to.

Get the £^@% debt paid off and you can start a-fresh. Pick one of the debts that's with the original creditor and pay £13k minus the money for your second F&F, plus half of your xmas money.

Get it out of your accounts and away from your spending habits. You can spend again once you've out of debt. Which won't be very long... unless you're going to keep frittering the cash away. In which case I'm not sure what we're all doing here.

The £13k includes the first Full and Final that I've paid. There's £7,250 left now, I suppose I've been trying to deny the truth of the matter, anyhow it's out now.

Mrs. K. is taking over the January budget, she's not really pleased with the mess I've made of it. I really struggled to keep to we spend x amount on this and not over and x amount on that. Over the next few days we are going to go back to the beginning and make a detailed SOA to stick to.