Mr and Mrs K's New Journey to a Debt Free Life.

EchoDelta

AlexLK wrote: »

Why is this comment relevant to my situation?

I have not really "saved" £13,000, I have sold some things that were mainly surplus to requirements and a couple of items I now regret selling (MGC bonnet and a watch).

I read this as being in response to your comment about your "miserly means" up thread.

Presents for a car? That already has perfectly serviceable carpets? Really?! That's kind of made me groan and laugh all at the same time!

theoretica

AlexLK wrote: »

I am really struggling to make this work at the moment, feeling like we have sacrificed our lifestyle for ages (in reality it's 98 days ).

As a matter of semantics I don't think you have sacrificed anything. You have pulled back from a method of living which was, and still is, beyond your means. But you seem to be thinking smarter about your purchases - getting pleasure from upgrading your belongings at little or no net cost, rather than adding to them.

Madmel

Alex, you've had a blip after a rough couple of days. Take a deep breath and refocus.

You have done amazingly well over the last 3 months in turning things round and facing many of your demons head-on. Whilst I am not condoning spending money you can ill-afford on *frivolities*, you can cancel the order after the weekend, so no massive harm done.

Remember how far you have come - if in doubt, read some of the early pages on this thread - and the timescale is really short for you to change your habits. As an analogy, I took DD2 to the orthodontist yesterday. She sucked her thumb furiously until she was 7 and has had really goofy teeth as a result. Since the end of September, she has had removable braces to wear on both her upper and lower teeth; the upper ones to bring her front teeth in, the lower ones to move her bottom jaw forwards. She has worn these for an average of 22 hours per day (takes them out for eating, sport including ballet and for French Horn playing). Her overbite has gone from 10mm to 4mm in 10 weeks because she has been really disciplined. That's like your spending. The orthodontist has told her to go to half-time wearing them, not because she needs them any more, but to remind her jaws of the position they should be in. That's like everyone on here getting on your case - they don't mean to be harsh, but they can see just what a fantastic job you have done, and they don't want you to slip back into your old (goofy) ways. You are doing so well that nobody wants to see any regression.

Chin up, play some scales, remind Mrs K what a wonderful lady she is and tomorrow is another day.

Best of luck and we are all rooting for you x

mum2one

Dont forget its free listing on ebay - thinking if you want Xmas delievery this weekend may really be the last possible time. x

AlexLK

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Really disappointed Alex. You're just making excuses to throw money around again now.

Harsh? Yep, but true. I'm not surprised Mrs K. is annoyed.

Cancel the carpet order. Put the oak stand on sale. Why do you need another music stand? What does mahogany do that oak, pine or metal don't?

*harsh hat off*

If you've got that much cash to chuck away, you can sponsor my cheerleaders :P

To give some perspective maybe - the £140 on those mats (I paid £6 for my Corsa's!!) could buy us 3 uniforms that we currently can't afford.

You can do better than this hun.

HBS x

I have to admit you're right. However, I've spent this evening wondering how I can make the changes I made over these past few months permanent.

LannieDuck wrote: »

I think Mint was responding to you saying how hard you were finding it. You've done really well in paying off so much so fast, and hopefully your debt-free journey will be mercifully swift. Many people aren't so lucky and are in it for years.

I can sympathise with you regretting some sales. But there's nothing to stop you keeping an eye out for similar items in future and re-purchasing them... when you're out of debt.

In that case I apologise as I took Mint's comment as a bit of a "dig".

Thank you, I will consider that.

*Robin* wrote: »

Alex, is this Triumph the kind of project one enjoys while improving/renovating it, with the eventual intention of selling at a profit (some of which then starts a fund for the next project)?

If so, I can see a justification for buying mats to match the interior as presumably they will add value (hopefully more than £140 worth). But in that case, the cost should either come from the renovation budget, or - if you and MrsK will derive sufficient enjoyment from the improvements when you drive the car in the months/years before sale - then this purchase could be a mutual xmas present?

Anyway, don't beat yourself up over possibly giving in to this desire; instead congratulate yourself for soul-searching over whether you ought to go ahead with it on Monday. ..Very MSE. :T

As usual, communication is key:
:think: Does MrsK think you should cancel the order?

Thank you for your helpful comments.

To clarify the Triumph is my car, I've owned it since I was 20, so not something bought to sell on.

Mrs. K. wants me to cancel.

AlexLK

EchoDelta wrote: »

I read this as being in response to your comment about your "miserly means" up thread.

Presents for a car? That already has perfectly serviceable carpets? Really?! That's kind of made me groan and laugh all at the same time!

So far as my "miserly means" goes, I was not lying.

Seeing it written makes me cringe slightly. However, it's nothing new.

theoretica wrote: »

As a matter of semantics I don't think you have sacrificed anything. You have pulled back from a method of living which was, and still is, beyond your means. But you seem to be thinking smarter about your purchases - getting pleasure from upgrading your belongings at little or no net cost, rather than adding to them.

Thank you, that is what I was aiming for with the music stand.

Madmel wrote: »

Alex, you've had a blip after a rough couple of days. Take a deep breath and refocus.

You have done amazingly well over the last 3 months in turning things round and facing many of your demons head-on. Whilst I am not condoning spending money you can ill-afford on *frivolities*, you can cancel the order after the weekend, so no massive harm done.

Remember how far you have come - if in doubt, read some of the early pages on this thread - and the timescale is really short for you to change your habits. As an analogy, I took DD2 to the orthodontist yesterday. She sucked her thumb furiously until she was 7 and has had really goofy teeth as a result. Since the end of September, she has had removable braces to wear on both her upper and lower teeth; the upper ones to bring her front teeth in, the lower ones to move her bottom jaw forwards. She has worn these for an average of 22 hours per day (takes them out for eating, sport including ballet and for French Horn playing). Her overbite has gone from 10mm to 4mm in 10 weeks because she has been really disciplined. That's like your spending. The orthodontist has told her to go to half-time wearing them, not because she needs them any more, but to remind her jaws of the position they should be in. That's like everyone on here getting on your case - they don't mean to be harsh, but they can see just what a fantastic job you have done, and they don't want you to slip back into your old (goofy) ways. You are doing so well that nobody wants to see any regression.

Chin up, play some scales, remind Mrs K what a wonderful lady she is and tomorrow is another day.

Best of luck and we are all rooting for you x

Madmel: Thank you, lots to think about. Perhaps too much at this time of night.

AlexLK

mum2one wrote: »

Dont forget its free listing on ebay - thinking if you want Xmas delievery this weekend may really be the last possible time. x

Already planned to list a couple of things.

*Robin*

AlexLK wrote: »

To clarify the Triumph is my car, I've owned it since I was 20, so not something bought to sell on.

Mrs. K. wants me to cancel.

Ah. Well, bang goes your let-out clause Alex.

Decision made, then?

Mint1955

Sorry Alex, not a dig just very tired frustration as sometimes you just sound like a very spoiled child and last night it really hit home. You have things to sell, you eat well, you have changed so much already and you do have the word saved in your signature etc. yet you are still feeling sorry for yourself.
You have done amazingly in 98 days. Little K is doing well Mrs K must be seeing a different you stop being so hard on yourself.

AlexLK

*Robin* wrote: »

Ah. Well, bang goes your let-out clause Alex.

Decision made, then?

It's starting to seem that way. Considering my wife seems willing to fall out with me over this (she thinks my reasoning is "fussy") I can see me giving in tomorrow and cancelling the order.

Mint1955 wrote: »

Sorry Alex, not a dig just very tired frustration as sometimes you just sound like a very spoiled child and last night it really hit home. You have things to sell, you eat well, you have changed so much already and you do have the word saved in your signature etc. yet you are still feeling sorry for yourself.
You have done amazingly in 98 days. Little K is doing well Mrs K must be seeing a different you stop being so hard on yourself.

Thank you for the clarification.

I don't mean to come across that way (as a "spoiled child") and think that is a little unfair. My wife and I live on a relatively low income and I cannot deny there are times that I feel sorry for myself due to this fact.

Sorry, I do indeed have the word "saved" in my signature.