Surname after marriage?

FopMistress

heartbreak_star wrote: »

I have absolutely no intention of changing my name if I marry. I love it, it's part of my identity and I belong to me, not anyone else!

(And for anyone who references having my father's surname, my parents joined their names upon marriage as they saw themselves as equals.)

HBS x

I've been separated a month. I didn't change my surname when I got married 14 years ago because I really couldn't get my head around being known as one surname one day and a different one the next. Now that I am no longer with my husband and due to the way my marriage has ended I'm so thankful I didn't change it.

sweaty_betty

I didn't change my name when I got married (for a whole range of reasons, but mainly because I didn't see the point), but when I notified work that I'd got married to change emergency contact details etc etc they automatically started to change my details, email address to his surname! I was quite cross about this and soon put them right.

NoGoodNamesLeft

ellay864 wrote: »

And on the wedding board a couple of years ago there was one bride whose husband took her name

That's what we're doing. He has changed his name by deed poll in the past and it was quite simple, so that's probably what he'll do this time.

Reading this thread has made me think that maybe he should change it sooner as he needs a new passport. Cheaper to get it in the new name than change it. Or can a man travel with an old name on his passport?

Tish_P

pigpen wrote: »

I loathed my maiden name... divorced the adulterous cretin so feel wrong using his name.. so now I don't feel like I have any name that is mine I don't know what to answer when people ask my name or I have to write it down.. I can't see me ever getting married again so I am stuck in a nameless limbo

This is really sad! So sorry you are feeling this way - I hope things look up.
Can you change your name just for you? To symbolise a new start and new self-image? I know several people who've done this - taken a name from previous generations, or named themselves after a place that means a lot to them.

I love my surname despite it being a very common one, and wouldn't change it. I'm not at all keen on my christian name, though, but I don't dislike it enough to change it.

Goldiegirl

I did change my name on marriage.

My husbands surname is similar to my maiden name, and starts with the same letter.

So I still have the same initials, so I still feel like 'me'

claire16c

NoGoodNamesLeft wrote: »

That's what we're doing. He has changed his name by deed poll in the past and it was quite simple, so that's probably what he'll do this time.

Reading this thread has made me think that maybe he should change it sooner as he needs a new passport. Cheaper to get it in the new name than change it. Or can a man travel with an old name on his passport?

There's no need for a deed poll if he changes his name after you get married he can just use your wedding certificate to change his passport.

However if he wants to change his passport and put the new name on it before you get married as youre travelling before the wedding then yes he'll have to do a deed poll or get a declaration signed by a solicitor or such like.

You can travel on your passport in your old name - just make sure your flights are booked in that name.

So I guess it depends on when his passport expires and when you're getting married and if you're going away before then.

Dimey

pigpen wrote: »

No it doesn't if it is a divorce.. you go through exactly the same process with your decree absolute as you did your marriage certificate.. you don't need to change your name by deedpoll if reverting to your maiden name it is always your name .. you can be called anything you like without any monetary outlay.

I loathed my maiden name... divorced the adulterous cretin so feel wrong using his name.. so now I don't feel like I have any name that is mine I don't know what to answer when people ask my name or I have to write it down.. I can't see me ever getting married again so I am stuck in a nameless limbo

Have you thought about changing your name to one you like - say one of your maternal grandparents' name?

PurpleJay

I changed my name on my passport before the wedding by getting the registrar to sign a form. Here is the info from the gov.uk website. Tickets and passports have to have same names on.

"3. Getting married or entering a civil partnership

Decide whether to change your name before or after the ceremony - the name on your passport must be the same one you use when you book your travel.

Before the ceremony
You can change the name on your passport up to 3 months before the ceremony. Your old passport will be cancelled.

The new passport is ‘postdated’ - you can’t use it before the ceremony.

Some countries won’t issue visas for post-dated passports - check with the country’s consulate.

You must send a standard passport application form, along with the form ‘passports for newly weds and civil partners’, signed by the religious minister or registrar who will conduct the ceremony. Download the guidance notes if you need help.

After the ceremony
Send the standard passport application along with your marriage or civil partnership certificate.

Any unexpired visas in your old passport may become invalid - check with the country’s consulate."

PurpleJay

For everything else, I just wrote a standard letter. Eg: Following my marriage on X I have changed my name to X. Please find enclosed a copy of my marriage certificate. Please amend your records accordingly. The bank may have needed to see an original but I don't recall.

Cliecost

So does she sign with my surname on the registry as we get married?