Wedding invite

Nicki

DH has been given a wedding invite from one of his junior colleagues at work. It was in an envelope addressed to DH and Nicki. Inside the invitation itself has no names on it but comes with an insert with details of how to get to the venue, gift list etc and a section headed Children which says babies and children are welcome and an entertainer has been booked.

So the question is: does this mean our kids are invited or not invited? The wedding is a 7-8 hour drive away so would need an overnight stay which means if not invited we'd have to decline with regrets and send a gift. We'd rather not ask outright because we don't want the employee to feel he HAS to invite them though he hasn't otherwise planned to. Nor do we really want to seem to snub him by declining the invite unless there is no option.

What would you do?

Any

I would take it as invited???

paulineb_2

Ask.

And explain the situation re the kids. But if the invite says babies and kids are welcome and an entertainer has been booked it would seem a bit odd if they then said no kids.

Person_one

I think they're invited, it says explicitly that babies and children are welcome!

Brian8888

I think they are invited. And as they might not remember the names of your kids they would not write that on the envelope.

wiogs

I would have though that people with kids would have had an invite which said (& Family)

I would expect the invite that said DH & Nicki to be for those two people only.

Is the insert a generic one? It may well be that the details are there for those that have explicitly had their children invited.

Easiest way to find out is ask. I know you would rather not but probably safer. OH might just drop into the conversation that you would love to come, just need to arrange childcare. See what the reaction is.

supersaver2

I would take that to mean they are invited, they probably just don't know the names of all their guests children. Would have been better to add 'and family' on the front of the envelope just to remove all doubt though!

maman

If you don't want to ask the groom, why not ask around other colleagues.

bitemebankers

Definitely sounds to me like they're invited. Certainly, I don't think a couple who *didn't* want children around would lay on an entertainer for them.

seven-day-weekend

I would not assume they are invited. I would have put Mr D, Mrs D and family if they were. Although the insert seems to suggest that they are. You are going to have to ask!

nearlyrich

The only way to be sure is to say to the groom, there is some confusion about whether our two children are invited, we are not asking you to invite them if they are not included already but if they are not invited we would feel embarrassed on the day if we just turned up with them.

Don't say anything about not being able to go if the children are not invited at this stage as it sounds like you are giving an ultimatum.

If you do have to decline if they are not invited you can send a gift as you say and decline without making it about the childcare.