Parents who force their children into religion?

Torry_Quine

GwylimT wrote: »

My parents are strict seventh day adventists, so nothing can be done on Saturdays but reading the bible and praying, no stimulants so no alcohol, caffeine, nicotine etc. No pork, no shellfish, nothing with webbed feet like duck. Gay people are evil, no white people are evil, no believers are evil etc. We were all baptised when we were 12, we were told if we refused we would no longer be welcome in their home and they were serious. I stopped attending church when I could afford to move out and my parents haven't spoken to me since. They also refuse to speak to my son, he is adopted (my cousin is his biological mother) and they refuse to speak to him as he is a !!!!!!! in their eyes and therefore a sinner.

My wife is a muslim she goes to mosque when she has time she doesn't eat pork etc or drink alcohol.

We don't take our children anywhere religious like mosque unless they ask, we do however celebrate a range of religious festivals in turn so they can learn about them better, so one year will have christmas, then diwali etc when they're old enough to actually understand the meaning instead of just thinking "yeah presents" or "cool dress up".

Forcing religion onto your children is no different to forcing atheism on them either, I know people who are embarrassed and scared to tell their friends and family that they are religious, its ridiculous.

None of us are bothered if our children are religious or not, as long as they're happy with what they believe it doesn't matter, but due to my own experiences I would worry if they moved towards judaism or seventh day adventism.

I totally think that the attitude of your parents is wrong and they are the ones missing out.

I agree forcing religion is wrong but surely all parents will bring up their children in the believe system or abscence of that they live by themselves as obviously they think it the best way to live.

Person_one

lostinrates wrote: »

Nevertheless, they aren't all the fault of poor old Torry Quine who gets it in the neck a lot on these boards! (Even though I often don't agree with her I have seen her used as a bit of a punch bag recently, not that I think you are doing that person one, I believe you have far too much integrity for that)

I'm fairly sure I haven't made any comment at all about TQ!

Although I am more than willing to challenge her in DT when its appropriate, and she is more than capable of sticking up for herself without needing anybody else to do it for her.

lostinrates

GwylimT wrote: »

My parents are strict seventh day adventists, so nothing can be done on Saturdays but reading the bible and praying, no stimulants so no alcohol, caffeine, nicotine etc. No pork, no shellfish, nothing with webbed feet like duck. Gay people are evil, no white people are evil, no believers are evil etc. We were all baptised when we were 12, we were told if we refused we would no longer be welcome in their home and they were serious. I stopped attending church when I could afford to move out and my parents haven't spoken to me since. They also refuse to speak to my son, he is adopted (my cousin is his biological mother) and they refuse to speak to him as he is a !!!!!!! in their eyes and therefore a sinner.

My wife is a muslim she goes to mosque when she has time she doesn't eat pork etc or drink alcohol.

We don't take our children anywhere religious like mosque unless they ask, we do however celebrate a range of religious festivals in turn so they can learn about them better, so one year will have christmas, then diwali etc when they're old enough to actually understand the meaning instead of just thinking "yeah presents" or "cool dress up".

Forcing religion onto your children is no different to forcing atheism on them either, I know people who are embarrassed and scared to tell their friends and family that they are religious, its ridiculous.

None of us are bothered if our children are religious or not, as long as they're happy with what they believe it doesn't matter, but due to my own experiences I would worry if they moved towards judaism or seventh day adventism.

How shocking.

Please know however, that Jews are a hugely diverse religious group. My (not religious) Jewish husband's family range from not at all religious like him to Rabbis! And most of them are fantastically open minded people, no more bigoted as a group than any other group of people. For example, despite only ever have received offensive rascism from Muslims my husband would be moved to defend Islam if someone replaced the word 'Judaism" with the word ' Islam' in your last sentence and we are lucky enough to have good, good friends to whom the cultural background and religious flavour is....not useful. The diversity and wealth of experience, opinion, and insight is something I value.

GwylimT

lostinrates wrote: »

How shocking.

Please know however, that Jews are a hugely diverse religious group. My (not religious) Jewish husband's family range from not at all religious like him to Rabbis! And most of them are fantastically open minded people, no more bigoted as a group than any other group of people. For example, despite only ever have received offensive rascism from Muslims my husband would be moved to defend Islam if someone replaced the word 'Judaism" with the word ' Islam' in your last sentence and we are lucky enough to have good, good friends to whom the cultural background and religious flavour is....not useful. The diversity and wealth of experience, opinion, and insight is something I value.

Until this summer we have lived in Aberystwyth and every year large numbers (as in thousands) of jewish people stay for the summer, they regularly verbally abused women in the street, protested outside of churches and would protest on a saturday as people were working. I can't remember if it was last summer or the summer before, a rabbi drowned and the 'community' blamed what they called "bleeding sinners" meaning women.

This year they have now been banned from staying in their usual housing (student housing), the university have publicly stated this is due to them using candles, but it is actually due to the bad rep they have received by supporting such abusive individuals by allowing them to use their facilities. The Aberystwyth university summer school has had to move several times as they would be extremely abusive to female students staying in the same housing. It really is strange what some people will do, I find it odd that they justify such behaviour with their religion which of course they can, yet if someone else of no, or another religion did the same they would be calling them all sorts.

Its a very strange place really, aside from the yearly gathering of jewish people there is also a large compound just outside of Aberystwyth that houses mormons, I'm not sure why it is a popular destination for followers of certain religions there must be a historic reason. There is also a holiday camp near by for seventh day adventists.

Person_one

You do realise its madness to judge thousands of people based on the behaviour of a small proportion of them?

lostinrates

GwylimT wrote: »

Until this summer we have lived in Aberystwyth and every year large numbers (as in thousands) of jewish people stay for the summer, they regularly verbally abused women in the street, protested outside of churches and would protest on a saturday as people were working. I can't remember if it was last summer or the summer before, a rabbi drowned and the 'community' blamed what they called "bleeding sinners" meaning women.

This year they have now been banned from staying in their usual housing (student housing), the university have publicly stated this is due to them using candles, but it is actually due to the bad rep they have received by supporting such abusive individuals by allowing them to use their facilities. The Aberystwyth university summer school has had to move several times as they would be extremely abusive to female students staying in the same housing. It really is strange what some people will do, I find it odd that they justify such behaviour with their religion which of course they can, yet if someone else of no, or another religion did the same they would be calling them all sorts.

Its a very strange place really, aside from the yearly gathering of jewish people there is also a large compound just outside of Aberystwyth that houses mormons, I'm not sure why it is a popular destination for followers of certain religions there must be a historic reason. There is also a holiday camp near by for seventh day adventists.

As person one rightly says, this is not all Jewish people, this is some.

Some Christians have spent entertains attacking each other in Northern Ireland. (And elsewhere in the world) we all know the terrible reputation Islam has been given by extremists whose views are so far from the views of people I count as friends.

I'm very sad you have had some terrible experiences....I'm sadder still you are letting it colour your opinion to others and potentially deny yourself good ones, or give them bad ones.

neverdespairgirl

GwylimT wrote: »

Until this summer we have lived in Aberystwyth and every year large numbers (as in thousands) of jewish people stay for the summer, they regularly verbally abused women in the street, protested outside of churches and would protest on a saturday as people were working. I can't remember if it was last summer or the summer before, a rabbi drowned and the 'community' blamed what they called "bleeding sinners" meaning women.

I've looked it up - and the articles about it say that "hundreds" or "up to a thousand" Orthodox Jews have visited Aberystwyth for a fortnight each summer for hte last 20 years or so.

It's pretty clear from the various articles / photos that those who have been on this trip are Hasidim - the ultra orthodox, who wear particular clothes, have ringlets (men) and cover their hair with hats, scarves or wigs (women).

So firstly, judging an entire religion from the activities of one sub-set of it seems pretty odd to me. I wouldn't spend a fortnight amid a group of exceptionally orthodox Muslims on holiday and condemn the whole religion. I wouldn't spend a fortnight at an extreme south-USA Christian university and condemn Christianity.

Secondly, it's a sad fact that people behave badly on holiday, in different ways. If you were Spanish, living in Majorca, you'd probably be happy your children grew up anything but British. Or in various Cypriot resorts, too.

nearlyrich

I was brought up in a catholic family and I don't conform to the catholic ideal, been married and divorced and remarried ( Never in the catholic church to be fair). You can't force your beliefs on someone , if you don't believe in God for whatever reason you shouldn't pretend to. Some of the biggest hypocrites are people with a religion and no tolerance for people who believe something different.

geoffky

Countering brainwashing from a very very early age is a hard thing to do because the state brainwashes you, along with your school and parents..
Many grow old not realising what was done to them from such a early age.

geoffky

Torry_Quine wrote: »

I see nothing wrong with parents taking children to church or equivalent when young. However when the child is old enough they should be allowed to go or not depending on what they believe. It does no-one any favours forcing people to go somewhere they don't believe in and could easily have the opposite result from wanted.

You have no problem allowing your children to be brainwashed then when they have been you then give them a choice?