Opinion on leaving 13 yr old and 9 yr old home alone while working 9-5?

angelil

Erinnire wrote: »

I would say no, between 13 - the day I left home at 16 I was used as a childcare 'servant' to my parents who left me with children 7 & 9 years younger than me. I spent almost everyday either screaming or crying and cant even begin to tell you how unhappy I was.

I know it is only for 6 weeks but my sisters where awfully behaved as soon as my parents left and the only time they would actually listen to me is when I broke down into tears.

I've been through so much since bad stuff since then and that is still the worst period of my life.

My sisters were younger but you cannot guarantee the youngest will behave when you are away.

I feel really sorry for the experience you had. It's clear that your parents did not consider you in this at all.

However, I would say that the OP is trying her hardest to consider all consequences for her children (unlike your own parents, apparently).

Another question I have for the OP is this: will the kids really be tied to the house? Or will they just maybe have to stay there for the morning and eat lunch there and then be allowed to go out in the afternoons (e.g. to the local park)? Them being allowed to go out in the local area makes all the difference in my opinion. Being tied to the house for six weeks straight is, I think, unfair, as others here have stated.

claire16c

You could use summer camps at schools/sports halls/various clubs they're normally pretty cheap, take 2 weeks holiday or delay your job. You can't just leave them for 6 weeks with nothing to do poor kids!

megela

We have a 14yo & 10yo and both work 5 days a week. We are both using a days annual leave each per week to reduce childcare to 3 days for the 10yo, then she will spend a day with each grandmother & come to work with me for a day.

My 14yo is expected to make her own arrangements now, stay home, or visit family/friends etc for the 3 days.

In no circumstances would I ever consider leaving her the responsibility of looking after her sister for longer than an odd hour.

balletshoes

WantToBeSE wrote: »

Hi everyone. Thanks very much for all of your opinions, it seem to be the general consensus that it's not an acceptable thing to do.
The reason i have asked is that i live in an area where there is no full time provision for childcare in my town, and i am wondering how i will cope in the summer holidays when i start full time work.

I don't have any family nearby (they all live at least 250miles away), and all of my friends work full time, so couldn't help out.
I don't understand how i am going to manage it...

Have you looked at your local council's website for whats on for kids in your area over the summer holidays?

Do your kids (especially the 9-year old) have any friends who would like to go with them to a council-run day or 2, if say they ran them from 10-3pm? I did that with my child one year - I took responsibility for taking my DD and the friend to the venue for 9am (they had to be signed in by an adult and it was restricted numbers, first come, first served and very popular because it was full day and very cheap for city residents) then the friend's parent would pick them up at 3pm, sign them out, and I'd try and get home as soon as possible after that time.

If all else fails, and you really can't take time off in the 6-weeks holidays, how about asking one of your family if they'd take the kids for you for a week or 2? My DD has gone to her grannies for some of the summer holidays for the last 6 summers - this is the first year I'm allowing her to stay home, because she's 12 now, and also because this year I can manage to cover half the summer with my annual leave, and the rest of the time my sister can help out (ie I look after her daughter, then she looks after mine and vice versa).

Torry_Quine

Many churches have holiday clubs and these are usually free or very low cost

go_cat

I don't mean to be horrible to you OP but why are you only asking this two weeks before the kids break up?

What have you done in previous years?

kjmtidea

I definitely wouldn't leave them that long, they would be bored out of their minds and bored children can quickly equal to chaos with no adults.

Do you know any of their friends parents? Could they possibly spend one day a week with them? If I knew someone in this situation then I would be more than happy to help.

Abbafan1972

I haven't read through the whole thread, but from secondary school age, I had to stay home alone during the school holidays (including the 6 weeks), as both my parents worked.

I am an only child, so had to make my own amusement. This was in the 80's, so no internet or console games. Occasionally I would see friends, or have a friend round. My Nan lived local, so I would visit her. I was very responsible so nothing bad ever happened.

I wouldn't leave my kids for that length of time, I think they are ok for an hour max, if I need to pop out, but not a whole day!

Seanymph

It's 'annoying' to have to wait to apply for full time work to care for your own two children because they are still young?

Sometimes I end up aghast on here.

I think parents who delegate the parenting to the older child are awful. The littlest is still young enough to need parenting - that should be you, not their sibling.

There are lots of things you can do as a family, the six weeks are long, and a great time to build fantastic family memories - they will be young for such a short time - you will hit time when you have no idea even if they will arrive for meals and you will see so little of them.

This year they aren't old enough - despite your want to be away from them and to leave them to their own devices they really aren't - and not one poster on here validates that as a choice.

But 'annoying' to have to look after your own kids.

Sheesh.

moomoomama27

Definitley would never even dream of leaving my 10.5yr old alone for a couple of hours, let alone all day every day!

I don't think it's fair to the 13 yr old to be left in charge, it's a huge responsibility, and if anything were to happen you would be responsible. Also what a naff summer break for them no parent carer interaction.