What I didn't know until I had children

pigpen

Milky baby sick is bearable but foody sick.. omg... no chance.. mine were trained to get to the loo or receptacle before they were 2.. if they miss they clean it up themselves... I can cope with anything but that..

sharp910sh

Peppa Pig is evil...

zenmaster

I ended up with 5 kids.

I finally worked out what was causing it but I still don't know who was doing it.

fabforty

Another thing that I didn't know is just how good children's television is. Seriously, I am so impressed. Not with all of it, I must admit but overall it is pretty good especially the educational ones on Cbeebies (e.g. Alphablocks and Numtums). I love Horrible Histories and Justin Fletcher is my new hero!

Gorgeestwo

That I would lose my memory, before children I never wrote a list, needed a diary or calender, now if its not written down in several places, with a reminder set on my phone/ipad, then I'm probably not going to remember :rotfl:

I also never realised how many adults seem to forget that they were children once or even had children themselves (though obviously that could be to do with the memory thing above )

I never knew how much I would sometimes long for peace and quiet, but if I get it, I miss the constant chatting and never ending questions

pukkamum

I discovered that despite telling myself, I would never use food, t.v etc as a means to get 5 mins peace, I do, without guilt.
That silence is golden unless you have toddlers in which case it's highly suspicious.
That cold half chewed food is acceptable for you to eat when its on your kids plate.
That such a small human being could be capable of making you want to throw them out the window.
That in having 3 children, I am ruled by an army of my own creating.
That children grow waaaay too fast.
That toddlers have the ability to make 23 demands in as many seconds, within 2 mins of being up my toddler had asked for a biscuit, cake, a trip to the park, to play outside, a bacon butty and what was for breakfast, lunch and tea.
Oh and can I read this stack of books to her.

The knowledge that you will love them more than they will ever love you.

wannabee_in_credit

You will never be able to go to the toilet again without an audience.
And leading on from that, you never imagine that you will clap and cheer looking at the contents of a potty.

And be careful what you say in front of them... they will almost certainly repeat it when you least want them to.

It is the best, but hardest job in the world, with the most rewards.

pigpen

wannabee_in_credit wrote: »

And leading on from that, you never imagine that you will clap and cheer looking at the contents of a potty.

My 2 year old always wants to sniff her creations.. so of course we all have to have a sniff too.. and then say it smells beautiful.

OH's sister was horrified so got told off for behaving like an idiot (telling her it is disgusting for a start!!!) and not complying.. and was told to go out of the room when she was doing a poo if she was not willing to be 'delighted' by the 'snail' .. We had huge problems getting her to poo in the potty so if this is what we have to do, this is what we do.

We also wave goodbye to it down the loo lol

Jinx

Things I didn't know before I was a parent:

Just how much you love you have for a child - instant, unconditional, binding....all that mushy stuff.

That your place is in the wrong - teacher (insert significant person here) knows best....

That you do have the patience of a saint...

That I would repeat EVERY stupid phrase my mum and gran has ever used....

What A&E looks like! Know it well now...:eek: And with that, who knew you could be sooooo calm in a crisis...?

That they make you laugh, cry and scream by turns. And its so worth it that you hope to be a grandparent some day (not too soon though lol)

EvieSaver

wannabee_in_credit wrote: »

And leading on from that, you never imagine that you will clap and cheer looking at the contents of a potty.

I remember doing this!!!!! :rotfl:

I also completely agree with previous posts that baby advice books are useless. I found everything was suddenly a lot easier once I had thrown the books in the bin and just done what 'felt right'.

I am also surprised by the amount of times I still check my children are breathing at night - although this may be because one of them is so silent and still when asleep I have a fright that they actually are dead about once a week.