The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

PRINCESSX87

Thanks everyone.

I think I got my answer, Because after I posted here MIL called and said that her & FIL are buying us a TV for Christmas because they know how much this one is costing us. So I have called the company in question and awaiting for someone to call me back about having this television picked up. (PS: We was paying off for it - so kind of like we're renting it iykwim)

Appointment went well. Again, Its hard opening up about thoughts and feelings & the fact I know that I will have to start changing my outlook on things. But, I do feel more positive. I'm still not sure how changing the way I understand or even look about going out alone will help. But i'm willing to try anything.

Kez, You should give yours a call. Its so far, the best thing I have done.

Thank you for your support peeps x

Possession

Sorry just popping in quickly, overrun with work and just the little point of going to see a dog tonight that we might take in, her owner has had to go into a care home. Gulp!
Anyway, I presume that this is going to be rubbish? http://www.groupon.co.uk/deals/special/gg-groupon-goods-global-gmb-h-51-864/29233612?nlp=&CID=UK_CRM_1_0_0_310&a=1664

EstherH

HI PRINCESS, was reading through and was about to post that if what you owed on your tv was more than what you could buy a new one for, then go for a new one. But glad to hear that MIL/FIL are getting you one for Christmas. That's great, another debt will be paid off.

FAIRYPRINCESSK: was it you with the firework story - next door? That is awful. Glad that no one was hurt.

FUDDLE: glad that things are working out at MIL's. Great idea, you buying and cooking evening meals. So far they sound great. Love corned beef ash and pie. Just seen over on the grocery challenge thread, ideas for stretching gammon. Might be worth a look? Agree that the way sports day was handled was wrong. When do you move to Dorset by the way? Not sure if I have missed that or if you don't have a date yet. I tend to skim read in a rush most of the time.

Hugs to all those who need them. I'm sure there's more I should have mentioned, but minds like a sieve.

Not too well at the moment so making the most of some time off by sourcing Christmas presents on the net whilst I lie in bed. Also getting recipe ideas and trying to work out how to cut back the pennies even more.
Not been able to do any shopping but instead of sending other half and risking a high spend, I'm trying to work out other ways of making meals with what we have in already.

God bless. Esther x

[Deleted User]

We defrosted the bigger chest freezer this morning and I'm not buying any more meat or fish until Christmas!!! It's good to have a sort out once in a while but I'm staggered at the amount of YS things I've aquired over the past year and just popped in the freezer for a rainy day. I think we could make it to the deluge with what I've found and probably out the other side. Add to that the home grown fruit and veg this year and we're not going to go hungry through this winter, that's for sure!!!

lobbyludd

SQ - dd5 has been refusing to go to school this year too. She gets angry before she gets upset too, so can be a full on tantrum, hitting me and shouting and acting up before the clinging and tears hit.

she had a friend over this weekend and half way through told me she wanted the friend to go away and then shouted to get her out of the room, I set the friend up with some painting and spoke to dd and she kept saying the friend had changed and was just following her around, and she wanted to be on her own. Later I got them both playing a game with play dough and they parted as friends. It wasn't until later that day that dd told me next time her friend came they'd only paint and play the game, and we talked a bit more, that I realised dd hadn't been able to cope when her friend didn't like the game she had suggested, she thought it was a rejection of her and was feeling very insecure that her friend didn't like her - couldn't cope with that and reacted in fear.

I worry that a lot of what the school has described with her behaviour is about her insecurity and abandonment issues (her father very clearly favours spending time with ds, mostly I think because he was afraid of the responsibility of caring for a younger child's needs and thinks he doesn't understand girls, all of which may or may not be related to his alcoholism), and they don't have time to pick up on it. Thankfully after re-stating our family situation to the teacher this year (I have to do this with each teacher each year - you'd think they'd pass it on) she seems to understand more that dd isn't just being naughty, there are triggers, she's had a lot of things to cope with in her little life (I had a near total breakdown 2 years ago) she's only 5 and a quarter, and that being intellectually bright doesn't equate to emotional resilience.

before my depression and anxiety were under control I couldn't have dealt with this - I had a hard enough time just going into the school yard. But now I am OK with it - mostly I get sympathetic looks from parents who have been there at least once with one child, those who are lucky enough not to have experienced it are mostly sympathetic too, but if they aren't - sod them.

Am off sick today. Have been battling a nasty cold and cough for 10 days, not able to work a full day in work but catching up at home or working at home all day. yesterday my boss told me just to rest and not work at home in order to try and shake it off - but the kids were home ill too so no chance, I dithered and felt guilty about not going in today, but after dropping the children off came home and slept for 5 and a half hours, so clearly needed the rest.

have made a gp appointment (friday) more to appease my boss than anything as I know they'll send me out with the "fluids and rest" advice as there are posters everywhere in the surgery stating you don't need to go to the doctors for a cold, and I know from experience they won't give antibiotics for bronchitis.

sorry for wittering on, I know this doesn't compare to a lot of te serious problems a lot of you are having, and I'm sending positive thoughts your way, wish I could do something practical to help those of you struggling, but hope the thoughts help. lx

lobbyludd

good for you princess - I didn't understand how the counselling would work for my anxiety about people either - but it did, I was able to set up and host a book club for my neighbours, when at my worst I had difficulty walking past people in the street. Thankfully I think it can work whether you understand it or not. but I know the courage it must have taken to go - and you should be really proud

jem132

Hi all sorry I've not been around for a while .my little man9 has had to move to yet another school,I've been traveling 4 hours a day to get him there on top of this he has been diagnosed as autistic . We have also been going through the statementing proses it's been a difficult time .

I am now ready to be fighting fit and back to my old style ways x

Hope all is well with everyone xx

fuddle

Princess if there's a choice of buying outright and buying with interest - gotta go with saving and buying yourself.

No one gets their greedy little mitts on my cash anymore. Maybe use what you were spending on the repayments to put into a savings account and save for when items need replacing.

Our divan base is on its last legs. It's sat in that storage unit and I'm doubting it will make it down in one piece. If it goes we'll just sleep in the mattress on the floor until we have the savings. We have a fridge freezer and washing machine to find first so priorities dictate what we have to do. In that former life we would have spent what? £500 on all three items on credit because they're needed. They are wanted (although fridge is pretty near to need!) but we can manage and alter our behaviour and expectations until we have the money to get them.

Credit is all well and good but you can manage perfectly without it. Credit used to be my emergency blanket, now I just try to pre-empt stuff and if the SHTF the hopefully I will be able to solve it with tactics etc and not the credit card.

ArthriticOldThing

Thanks Alfsmum. The cold and damp do affect the arthritis. It varies depending on its own rules. Today I took an increased dose of painkillers and went back to bed for a while. I managed to get about 2 hours sleep so feeling a bit better.:)

Lovely post Mar. Wish I could stop stressing and worrying. It drives me into knots. Love the sound of all those lovely fragrances. :A

PRINCESSX87

Fuddle you've hit the nail on the head right there about credit.

At the beginning of my depression because I wanted to be included in things with friends & family I got everything on credit.
Also, I assumed that if I piled myself with "nice things" then I would feel better.

We have decided to cut our losses and ask the company to come and remove the TV. Its just something we cannot afford. It helps that OH parents have offered to get us one for Christmas - therefore, its one extra debt / bill we will not have.

Next to consider is my mobile contract. That's nearly ended now, So need to decide whether its within our budget to get a new handset / tariff as mine is on its last legs.