The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

FairyPrincessk

Oh Pops! How frustrating! Still, as you say you always disposed of things properly. There is no way they can lay blame at your feet without reasonable proof and they will not be able to find it.

ginnyknit

Pops, Im guessing they are suggesting 'someone' flushed adult nappies down the loo because you wouldnt lift the hatch in the garden and chuck it down there. It would be bloomin impossible to flush an adult nappy so yet again they are talking a load of rubbish. Why anyone would even suggest it is beyond me. Its more likely the family flushing babywipes, face wipes or ladies products - it clearly states on the pack not to flush these and its doubtful Pops that you use any such thing

Am on a mission now to try and cut my spending to a tiny amount as I am getting worried about the future for us, as are a lot of us on here no doubt. I went to Mr T for a few bits and it came to £31 and there was no meat in there. So tomorrow when DGs goes home I will be working out a plan of attack and paring things down. I usually have a rough meal plan in my head but need to fine tune everything.

[Deleted User]

POPS from the outside it sounds like a try on by the neighbours to me. If the water company had anything to say to you individually I'm certain they would write to you themselves to tell you what it was. The neighbours sound like they are trying to make you feel responsible for the whole incident. Why not contact your landlords yourself and tell them what has happened and what the neighbours are saying to you, and that they are saying they might take legal action, it would pre-empt any attempt on thier part to lay the entire blame on you wouldn't it? Try not to worry too much, easy for me to say, I'm sure it will sort itself out in the not too distant future, Lyn xxx.

Mrs_Chip

They are bullying you Pops, and in a very cowardly way. They do not have the guts to come and speak to you face-to-face, and think they can intimidate you by writing threatening letters. I know there is no point in me saying not to worry, as you will, but remember you have documents from the water board that show you were not to blame in this instance (I assume this is the event they want compo for), so they can go whistle essentially.

Whether or not what they say about previous events is correct (and they obviously are not), the fact that nothing was said at the time, or later, means they did not give you any opportunity to rectify, so they cannot use it against you now. Oh, and they have admitted trespass!

I would try to keep calm, write down your version of events, and ring the landlord on Monday. Put your energies into getting things sorted in your head and on papaer, not fretting!

Kidcat - like the wheels !

kidcat

Pops - please dont worry, its been timed deliberately to cause maximum distress, its a con to try get you to pay them. If they did indeed enter your garden to take photos - said photos would form the case against themselves for trespass.

Thank you all for the good wishes, OH arrived home at 3.30am in a work van, I had locked up and rather than walk away he started hammering on door and ringing the bell.
I had to go unlock the door and let him in, he was furious I had locked him out.
I didnt sleep until 5.30am and kids were up at 7.45, so in three nights I have had about 6 hours sleep, the result is I am now totally drained. I made the decision to do the shopping, go straight to DD7 dance and then come home go to bed and leave him to it. He slept till 8.30 this morning so I figured he had had way more sleep than I had, especially as he spent the previous night in a hotel.

However the big car broke down on way home from dance, had to call AA and it appears that when I told OH to fill the car with diesel the other day, he only put half in, this meant that my 215 miles in two days ran the tank down to a low level, this has dragged up dirt again and will need the tank flushing out and yet another fuel filter.

Obviously I cant get that done before I leave Monday so I have had to hire a car, so my afternoon in bed was lost in organising the car and picking it up. Add in OH needing to return the work van and my having to collect him and I have not stopped all day.

On the plus side, I think the hire car will not cost me anything in the long run, as it is half the consumption of my big car and unleaded. I think the cost of the hire will equal the savings in fuel.

Tried to talk to him about how I feel put upon and how his not planning ahead or thinking of effects on anyone but himself is causing me and the kids major distress, but I dont think he really gets it. He did however discover some of the things that have been going on in past two weeks, that he has had no say in at all, and that has had an effect. In particular the plan of DS9 going on a school residential trip and my going and staying nearby to be able to spell the staff on nights came as a very big shock, especially when he discovered that plans had been made for rest of kids and all sorted with the help of lots of lovely people.

He has now realised that he has no idea what is going on any more and that neighbours and friends know more. One of the neighbours complained about him bring the truck home the other day as he apparently woke them all up when he left - so we have had words over that as well.

He told DD19 that he has arranged to finish work early on the day she is late finishing Uni so he can pick her up as buses have stopped by then - she just looked at him and said mum has booked me a taxi, we figured it would be more likely to come than you.

Sorry for long ranty post yet again, my mind is all over the place, am desperate to get away next week but really worried how I will be considering the lack of sleep this week.

Popperwell

Thank you for trying to make me feel better. I know its not legally binding and just general feelings. I am stuck till Monday. I will phone first thing. I managed to get a phone call to one of the people I play Bingo with(its not legal)but she thinks a try on.

My only living relative is away abroad but I talked to his son(My Cousin)he thinks like you that I am covered by my Landlord's insurance and that if there had been something, my Landlord/water company would have said something at the time and shown me such debris.

He even said without permission they have trespassed on my property too. I only remember two occasions of a blocked drain in 53 years of living here so if this is a third one why not tell me?

Fancy not having a call centre on duty most of the weekend.

Going to try and forget about it for now. Hey ho!

And you've problems too...relationships etc...are far more important. So to take time out for me means a lot x

OH I have arranged for a gardener to call and tidy things up for Winter...another job done.

Mrs_Chip

Kidcat, I do feel for you, it must be mentally and physically draining living life at the pace you do, and with little or no help or support from OH. I know this might be hard, but can you ask DD to take charge for a few hours so you can get some sleep? Surely she is old enough to see what is going on, and pitch in for a while to give you some relief.

I would be giving OH his marching orders, he sounds like a waste of space, sorry if that sounds harsh!

ginnyknit

Kidcat, well done on getting things off your chest and taking control too. I do hope he has a lightbulb moment and gets his bum into gear. Maybe you will get some sleep at the hotel next week, I do hope you do as you are seriously entering crash and burn territory, not being a scaremonger just pointing out the bl**dy obvious. I have always pushed myself way too far especially when Oh first took ill and I was a mobile manager and you just end up too ill to move.

Had Dgs today and he had a few meltdowns, boy is he strong but he is not maliscious he is just trying to tell us something is wrong. His speech is coming on well but he cannot tell you when he is feeling ill or has tummy ache etc. 2 minutes later he is his normal loving self. Anyway he had an early night, or rather he was watching tinytumbles with his grandy ( he decided grandad didnt suit him so changed it to grandy who loves the name) and they both fell asleep on the chair.

off to get myself busy in the kitchen...a scrimping we will go......

EstherH

KIDKAT: hope you can get a good nights sleep tonight. Any chance of a rest tomorrow for you? Is it Monday you go away?

POPS: as others have said, I think they are trying it on. Please try not to worry. Hope you can sleep ok tonight too.

God bless

Esther x

kidcat

Thank you for being so concerned, yes I am expecting a full nights sleep tonight and DD and I have discussed that I should work like mad packing car and getting sorted tomorrow morning, but that I should go to bed for a few hours in the afternoon to stack some sleep ready for Monday, she said I will make sure he looks after them!