The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

fuddle

My retirement age is 68 I believe. At very nearly 34 I expect it to rise well into my 70's by the time I get there.. or that there's no more state pension.

I have a private pension but only a tiny one. That will be a priority when I start working upping the payments but I don't understand fully and worry I'm throwing good money into something that will be ripping me off in the long run.

The thought of finding rent money when we retire fills me with dread so much so that the housing plan we're thinking about, especially if we move South, consists of trying to buy a 2 bed ground floor flat - ground floor in case of mobility issues, and paying a smaller mortgage so 1. we can afford to keep it this time and 2. to put more away for retirement.

I wonder how I sleep sometimes.

Well done little pooky! The feeling is awesome, may she float for days to come After seeing your reupholstering skills and your fab chair I dare not post the pic of my tshirt patchwork chair slip cover :rotfl::o

alfsmum

Yay, well done to Miss POOKY!!! :j

FUDDLE, the coffee question is tricky. The overwhelming advice in all anxiety related literature is to cut down on tea, coffee, cola, anything that contains caffeine as caffeine contains a stimulant that can mimic anxiety symptoms and thus be enough to convince someone prone to anxiety that they are having an attack. You know how it goes, you feel a bit nervy or stressed, worry you are going to have a panic attack which provokes the horrible physical sensations which fuel the worry and so it goes round and round. The general guideline is no more than 5 cups of tea or coffee a day but I guess that depends how strong the drinks are. I have weak tea and if I have coffee it is a milky one. I have drunk tea all my life and always found it calming rather than stimulating. I drink coffee pretty rarely but it can quickly be one addictive in that if I have a cup one day, I usually fancy one the following day too. The recommendation is to stop drinking caffeine altogether if you can and if I really thought not drinking tea would rid me of my anxiety, I would do it in a flash. Maybe I will give it a go?

Anyway, I suspect that the back to school/need to have everything under control/plan for every eventuality may be more at fault this time but it wouldn't hurt to cut out the coffee too. Pity really because a lot of Dh's running magazines list all the benefits of drinking coffee.
You can't win.

Regular eating is also very important in looking after yourself and reducing the anxiety. Keep your blood sugar stable, eat more high fibre (cereals, rice, pasta, wholemeal bread) and less high fat stuff (cakes, fried food, pastry). Have plenty of fruit and veg and high protein products, whether meat of veggie options. This will all help keep your blood sugar stable and stop the fluctuations that can increase anxiety.

Be kind to yourself, do the best you can but don't berate yourself for not being perfect. There is always light at the end of the tunnel even if it seems a long way away some days.:)

ginnyknit

Pooky congrats to your Dd, well done , just popped on your blog to see the chair, very neat for a first go and looks fab. Also the kitchen is lovely, I hadnt caught up, I bet you have saved a fortune and it looks very well done.

I have managed to lose 2 sacks of tulip bulbs that DD carried all the way from Amsterdam in her hand luggage earlier this year. And I mean sacks :mad: she bought me black ones ( goth tulips she said ) and red ones for OH, I also promised to do her a tub of them for her yard so I nipped out yesterday and bought a small bag of them for her. Hopefully now the others will miraculously re-appear. from where ever I put them.

alfsmum

mardatha wrote: »

Son didnt get his op yet! They fed him at 9pm and told him he's fasting again this morning. Accident was around 3pm on Monday, so no wonder he's on an antibiotic drip. Am not impresses by their care.
Is nice and sunny here so am off out to play in the jungle.. real danger of getting lost in the chickweed

Do hope they've done the op now Mar?

Sorry cant advise what to do with the liver but am surprised you have something GREEN lurking in the fridge:o

[Deleted User]

Afternoon Toughies, by golly it's hot out there today, we've just processed 4 huge bags of apples and He Who Knows is dodging the waspies as he's pressing the apples to juice them out in the garden, I've made sure the lurcha is INSIDE!!! and I've got the vinegar ready for emergency use if necessary.

FUDDLE we had a problem with coffee when we lived in Germany, I was getting massive migraines every afternoon and he who knows was getting chest pains and breathlessness due to drinking more coffee than was good for us, he now only drinks decaff and I only have 2 small cups if I have coffee and don't have that every day. I wonder if perhaps you just went into overdrive trying to get everything sorted out and being a bit anxious about the changes that might be happening would be at the back of your mind adding to it all as well. If you do cut out coffee you'll possible crave it for a week or so but after that it seems to ease off and you feel more level. When I was going through a worried patch in life I found some Japanese Chrysanthemum Tea which was really helpful in calming me down and stopping me from being on edge and fretty , I think they still sell it in health food shops.

OK Pet Hate of the day......... Behaviour of people in the queue (or not as it happens!) at the bus depot. I try to make sure I don't queue jump, I always go to the back and wait my turn, it is something that I feel is only fair. Today, I was waiting at the back and three hefty teenagers came and pushed in front of me and stood in the line. Then three ladies round my age also came and stood in front of the teenagers, nattering away, totally oblivious, totally away with the fairies. In came the bus, so I deliberately picked up my bag and walked round them to the place in the queue I'd been in before they arrived. The reason was that there were a couple of people with many bags who had been there waiting when I arrived that had been pushed to the now, back of the queue. So I stood, as a barrier and said in a fairly loud voice oh, you were here long before me, please do go ahead, the kids were fine, not a peep, just waited good naturedly, the 3 natterers, totally oblivious, just pushed on to the bus!!!!!!!!! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!! People criticise youth for not having manners, in my experience it's more likely to be folks my age and older who seem to expect people to give precedence to them, youth is in the main very well disposed, so let's hear it for the youth of 2013, Hoorah!!!!! Cheers Lyn xxx.

Knit_Witch

Fuddle how do T-shirts hold up upholstery wise? I have a couple of t-shirts where I want to keep the front and use them as cushion backs, would that work?

Knit_Witch

Mar how is your son? the op happened yet?

elona

Mardatha

Hoping your son has finally had his op.

Have spent most of the day cleaning, boiling, peeling and pickling beetroot as DH loves the stuff. Was getting to the last of it when a friend of his dropped off another big bag!!!:eek:

Making Bolognese sauce to stuff and bake a couple of marrows for tonight and might stuff one with couscous as an experiment and top with cheese.

Need to get dd to shopping outlet for new shoes and maybe smart trousers for work as she starts back on part time basis while she gets herself better. Also want sack of spuds, onions and carrots for over the winter. Trying to get everything done before DH starts hospital treatments so he can take things easy.

Monnagran

Would love to be a fly on the wall to see those who wanted rid of the rev read the newspaper on Friday.

Molly

Hope you feel better soon and get some peace and quiet.

Hugs to all

Pooky

Thanks all, DD1 is buzzing, she went out with DH for a test drive of our car (automatic as apposed to the manual she's just learnt in) and sussed it straight away, she drove round the village for a bit then on to a friends house. When they got back I told her to take it out alone and I saw that slight split second of hesitation before she was out there, music on and away she went. She then drove us to the Inlaws and back. She's so confident and very in control. So pleased for her.

We're off to look at a new car on Monday as DHs motorbility lease runs out soon, she's had a say in which car we're looking at as she will be driving it too (she's DHs named driver for when hes having bad days).

Ginny - I just love my kitchen, I spend a lot of time out there now, it came in under 1/3 of the quoted price from the cheapest quote we had. Plus I tweaked things along the way, they'd originally quoted for laminate flooring, I then changed my mind and wanted tiles and then changed it again and had the parquet flooring (which I loved laying, it was like a giant puzzle). Im just very greatful my Dad was able to help so much and show/teach me new things (also very greatful for his tool shed!)

ArthriticOldThing

Hello everyone.

Oh Mar, I hope your DS has had his op by now. Its just ridiculous making someone with a serious injury wait that long.

MrsLW, your tale of the bus queue reminds me of an incident yesterday. I was stood in the queue for the till at [EMAIL="H@@e"]H@@e[/EMAIL] [EMAIL="B@@@@@ns"]B@@@@@ns[/EMAIL] with another lady emptying her rather full basket onto the desk when an older woman pushed in front of her, plonked her bottle of some soft drink on the counter and said 'I've only got this one thing so I'll go first!' The rest of us in the queue were too gobsmacked to interfere but the girl at the checkout said this woman does the same thing every time. That kind of behaviour really annoys me.:mad::mad: None of would have minded if she had asked.

With coffee I've come around to 3 (very weak) cups during the morning and decaff for the rest of the day. Really can't drink tea unless am ill, but found several years ago that too much caffeine makes feel like am having panic attack with migraine thrown in as well.

Have been shopping and managed to fall over on the bus home:eek: - with a full trolley - was so embarrassed that others had to help me up as the knees were not able to do the job. So feeling a bit stiff and sore now. Fortunately no serious damage done except to my pride. Think I will have to be careful now as tripped over a broken pavement yesterday and they do say these things come in threes!!!:rotfl::rotfl:

Pooky - congrats to your DD on passing her test. Its something I never managed to do.

Better go back to finding somewhere to put my shopping.