The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

fuddle

Your two boys are extremely grounded, very kind, well mannered and know their boundaries and that what you say goes when they cross the line. If people around you judge you - given that they have seen your kids and parenting for longer than the couple of hours that I have, you need to whittle those people down and out of your life. They are mature people behaving appallingly and i dont honestly think you can get the friendship back. It's bizarre but not your fault. I suspect the bringing of the lads into it time and time again, your parenting, your age etc they/she is jealous of the relationship and mutual rapport/respect you all have. Do not let any of it get you down, you are so much better than those friends.

boultdj

[Hugs] Kezlou.


Maryb, how about marrow and ginger jam?or marrow wine then there's stuffed marrow, marrow fritter's, marrow cake......... oh crap! forget all but the wine I can remember eating the rest when I was little:eek::o:D

floss2

maryb wrote: »

....Anyone got any suggestions for using up marrows?:rotfl:

Jam or chutney

Mrs_Chip

Marrow Rum

http://www.allbritishfood.com/Marrow/Marrow%20Rum.php

fuddle

There's one for you kez - marrow jam! Mwahahaha! (Kez detests marrow)

kezlou

oh don't i tried marrow wine!

it tasted worse than liver urghhhhhhh


Now raspberry wine, that is so lush!!!!

Thanks everyone, sorry haven't replied. Had LA, sparkles and miranda in stitches. With tales of fruit loops, nuts, airies and lube. Not a good combination while drinking a cuppa!
Honestly fuddle read it on FB you'll be in stitches, sure cheered me up!


I have started the cull already, i decided on Thursday, it just wasn't worth it. Had them all trying to call / text me but i'm just ignoring them. don't need them in my life.

The only people i need are you lots on here and a group of peeps who make me and forget my troubles!
Oh and special nutters who chase me with pink balloons while a bouncy castle flies after us!

No i wasn't on medication at the time, just lovely boro filled chemical air!!!! But we have all the grown adults and kids peeing themselves laughing at us! :rotfl:


After seeing the way there behaved and the looks i got i know fine well i'm more than above them. D and L knew and saw the emotional and psychological myself and the children are in and used it to they advantage. Right now ds2 is worried in case he's approached in school by D. I told him he won't and if anyone says anything tell the teachers. I'm sure whether i should arrange a meeting on the day ds2 goes back and discuss the situation. The worst thing is they know D as her children went to the same school. But i'm also scared in case they approach the school with lies and claim child abuse. What am i to do.

I mean what kind of sick and twisted people could do this? But then i'm also thinking well its been done. I'm going to move on in my life. If i get any kind of nonsense of them i will get the authorities involved.

I do know what you mean Fuddle, if i was that bad a parent i'd have been pulled up by now. But instead i get told how well behaved, mild mannered and polite children there are.
I also know that I taught both of my children to read, write and do maths. I know that i have given MY children the best start in life.
The main thing that i want my children to grow up is that i love them very much and no matter what i will always be there for them.

If my children grow up knowing them, i will be more than happy, i will know that they had something that i never had.
Sounds corny i know

floss2

Kez, I'd be proud to have you as a friend in RL.

Chin up, and don't let yourself drop to their level

mardatha

Notjustlaura you'll probably find that gardening mags are geared up to the south of England, and things won't grow up here the way they're supposed to in the mags .. ask me how I know this !

fuddle

Kez your children respect you and they respect you because you discipline when needed, are not afraid to say no to them and spend time with them.

Respect is earned , I think, when you can have that kind of relationship - a take no nonsense friend. When my children do wrong - there's consequences and a lot of it is they have to deal with the feelings if disappointing me and their dad. It works because we haven't let them get away with silly behaviour or attitude. There's times when I had my 2 year old on time out or removed their toys tha I thought I was an over-reacting hard hearted horrible mother but now they are older there's no more 'teaching' they get that time in their bed means they've disappointed me (their no nonsense taking friend) and that they need to have the boundaries in order to feel safe and secure.

Just because you have told your children off and shown them there's consequences and disappointment surround poor choices and behaviour, doesn't make you a bad mam in my book. Your children are very happy, very caring and funny kids. They are calm and confident around strangers and have really great social skills. You were a mam at 17? Kez I know a new mam that was 38, a school teacher and now her little one is 9 she can't handle her. She has t the confidence (even though a teacher) to say no to her and its resulted in a chid who doesn't know boundaries, hasn't felt disappointment towards her, doesn't respect her elders, cannot share with her peers and therefore suffers socially, has temper tantrums at 9 if she can't get her way. It's so sad for the little girl.

You have nothing, nothing to worry about. She won't do that, she's not that brave - she's just a bully and she's a bully because she's jealous of your relationship with the boys. She knows how to threaten and hurt you. She's nasty kez and not a person you need to be around.

Keep strong, I'm just pleased you are not alone on this

[Deleted User]

KEZ lovie there are people in this world who just love to ferment discord wherever they go. Mean minded and thoroughly nasty bullies who gain great pleasure from making others suffer and they tend to attract like minded individuals as accolytes. It's not an easy thing to deal with but the only really effective way to deal with it is to totally exclude them all from your lives. Difficult as I suspect you are part of a circle of aquaintances where they form an integral part. It's also quite lonely at first when you walk away from the greater part of people you are friendly with. I've done it, had an incident at DDs school when we returned from abroad where she was physically bullied by some of the older kids and then her friends were bullied into being so nasty to her, then those who stayed loyal were physically bullied too. The school did nothing, the parents turned on me and I was ostracised it was a very unhappy time, as He Who Knows was still abroad, we'd come home to get little one a term to settle in at her old school, Ha Ha HA!!! I didn't understand any of it and all I could do was cry. The outcome of it was that I found a place at another school for my DD who was devastated by all of this, and in the next year she found new friends and so did I and we never looked back, then we moved here and had to start all over again so we were lucky to have the distance from the problems. I had the satisfaction of some years later when visiting old haunts one of the mothers involved came to see me and appologised, it had all stemmed from one child who was until DD came back queen bee and top of the class, she didn't like equals and was bribing the others with big bars of chocolate to see who could make my DD cry that day!!!! pure evil. She later, after we left got so out of hand she was making other girls steal to prove thier worth as part of her group and the police were involved. It's an awful place to be pet, and you need the short sharp cut to end it, good luck Lyn xxx.