The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

stiltwalker

Hugs kidcat - it's such a bind when school just stubbornly refuses to understand isn't it? DD's class is off to the deep in Hull next week and I was asked to go along - I said fine I'd go as a parent volunteer but I didn't want to have DD as she had her TA and none of the other mums on the last trip had their own kids - strangely enough they then had enough volunteer and I was not needed!!


Annual review coming up and going to have a few issues to raise with school so may be less than popular - they have to realise though that I know what I'm talking about so watch out. Getting so frustrated that school keep saying she can't do x y z when we can get her to demonstrate that she can first time we try - can't really decide whether they are not actually trying or whether they are just not trying the right way for DD - ah well keep battling on, could do without atm but then I'd probably be lost without good fight on my hands!


Catch you all later - Hx

kidcat

Oh stiltwalker how frustrating. So many define a child by their disability rather than their achievements.

PRINCESSX87

Hi everyone

Not much of MS been happening here. In fact, probably none.

Had family down the weekend and time went too fast. But very quickly we managed to make plans to regroup in a few months.

Things with my pops is sadly no better. Today we have found out that he has pre diabetes. Just another blow that wasn’t expected. Its also looking likely that he has prostate cancer too. Yet, He is still in denial that anything is wrong. All I keep hearing from him is “Stop worrying - They’ve got it wrong. There’s nothing wrong with me” And for the life of me, I don’t know how I haven’t snapped yet.

I’ve decided to start decorating the house. So, Spent all day yesterday finding the best deals on decorating items. Will get that ordered when OH is paid tomorrow.

One positive through all this, Is I managed to remain a non smoker. Currently at 29 days & 4 hrs!

Possession

Sympathies for those with school battles on their hands. I happened to bump into the mum of a boy from DS's old school this morning - remember the boy who was beating DS up for months (before he told us) and I had to threaten police intervention to get anything done about it? Well he went to the same secondary school as DS and is STILL not back at school, hasn't been in since October half term now. He still has barely left the house since Xmas, and then not voluntarily. He still won't eat anything she or his dad (who doesn't live with them but does help out as she was working full time - she is now signed off sick) cooks. He still lives on junk food. He is now having home tutoring but only 8 hrs per week and I think only 2 of those are actually with an online tutor, the rest is working himself, if he actually does it. He barely had any friends before - since he rarely behaved in a friendly way - but I'm not sure he sees anyone now. You know, I don't like him and I'll never forgive him but you've got to feel sorry for him haven't you. 12 yrs old and virtually no education happening. He has hit his mum too, knocked her to the floor and is as big as her now, so I feel even more sorry for her. I didn't know what to say TBH (getting him together with DS is NOT an option) - I asked what CAHMS were doing about it but the answer seems to be it takes 3 or 4 weeks to get round to answer whatever query there was at the last meeting. She doesn't even feel she can say no to him now because he gets physical with her and trashes the place. Poor family.

Pooky

Sounds like a nightmare situation Possession.

DD2's boyfriend was kicked out of school and had lots of issues with "anger", he was refered for anger management sessions but his new step dad didn't think he needed them so didn't take him. He was telling me the other day that since he's been involved with DD and coming to ours he feels like a different person, probably because we listen to him, talk to him and have helped him with CV's/job applications and training. We've got him enrolled in a new college course for September and he asked DH if he'd tutor him in maths as he hasn't passed any GCSE's. His parents just don't seem to care, they flash the cash but don't spend time or effort on him. He really is such a nice boy, makes the effort to cycle 12 miles here to see DD and just needs a bit of support.

Yesterday was spent either in bed or on the loo (sorry tmi) and I feel wiped today. DH has tummy gripes and has gone to bed so I'm guessing he'll start soon too. I'm so angry with my friend that popped in over the weekend, just as she was leaving she said they'd all had this tummy bug in the past few days and she was only just feeling human............well then don't go visiting others!!!!! Daft woman.

The wind has really picked up here and my bedding flew off the line and nearly ended up next door! At least it dried quick.

FairyPrincessk

Afternoon all,

Princess, Big Hugs and a BIG well done you on the smoking! I think spending time with family is certainly a part of OS. No matter who you class as your family it is so important to look after those relationships. I'm sorry to hear that things are so difficult with your father. What I do know, is that in many cases pre-diabetes can be reversed. Since it is something tangible that he can do something about that you officially know might it be possible to start there, leave the other things for a bit but help him research dietary changes. Maybe taking control of one thing will help him feel better able to face the rest.

For all of you parents fighting for your kids, you're all wonderful, strong parents. Possesesion that sounds like such a tough situation. While it sounds like this little boy was causing so many troubles for others that doesn't mean he doesn't deserve all of the help with his problems and the best education we can give him.

boultdj

PRINCESSX87 wrote: »

Things with my pops is sadly no better. Today we have found out that he has pre diabetes. Just another blow that wasn’t expected. Its also looking likely that he has prostate cancer too. Yet, He is still in denial that anything is wrong. All I keep hearing from him is “Stop worrying - They’ve got it wrong. There’s nothing wrong with me” And for the life of me, I don’t know how I haven’t snapped yet.

One positive through all this, Is I managed to remain a non smoker. Currently at 29 days & 4 hrs!

If it's any help,OH's Dad was the same, only he had been confirmed as having cancer, it seemed to help him keep fighting it, just to prove the 'expert's' wrong:on, he went on a lot of holliday's and concentrated on enjoying himself, and :T well done on the non smoking, I need tip's on the will power you'v got lose the lard I'm carting around

alfsmum

Possession poor family indeed and no life for a 12 year old

Must be the time of year for defrosting freezers - I am refusing to buy anything except essential fresh stuff until we have emptied ours. Could make for some interesting meals.

Managed to insure DD and her car for under 600 pounds but this will rocket once she passes her test. She was only 17 earlier this year and it does feel very young for her to be driving, but she has a nightmare bus journey to college so it will make a big difference if she can drive by next term. We helped get Dd19 on the road when she was 17 and she now runs her car from her student loan and Saturday job. We'll do the same for Dd17 and pay for her petrol to college, but she will have to pay for other trips from her Saturday job. That should reduce the amount of miles she does

Possession

Pooky that is annoying about the tummy bug.
Princess well done for continuing to be a non-smoker! I never got the habit but DH gave up after we moved in together and I remember how tough it was. Be warned he has on occasion slipped up again and I can smell it on him instantly every time! I hope there's some better news about your dad soon.

paidinchickens

Twoblackcats wrote: »

I loved the secret life of cats programme too. One of mine is quite nervous so I have tried blinking slowly when I look at him (according to the programme wide open eyes are a sign of threat/danger for a cat) well in true cat like fashion he stared at me like I was an idiot and flounced off back to his bed.
Carpets can be very expensive so it sounds like you've found a good deal compared to the big carpet shop prices. It will be lovely when it's done, nothing transforms a house like lovely fresh carpets.

:rotfl::rotfl: I was on the drive blinking at one of my cats until I thought ........... oh one of the neighbours might be watching me and they think I'm nuts already

Possession wrote: »

Sympathies for those with school battles on their hands. I happened to bump into the mum of a boy from DS's old school this morning - remember the boy who was beating DS up for months (before he told us) and I had to threaten police intervention to get anything done about it? Well he went to the same secondary school as DS and is STILL not back at school, hasn't been in since October half term now. He still has barely left the house since Xmas, and then not voluntarily. He still won't eat anything she or his dad (who doesn't live with them but does help out as she was working full time - she is now signed off sick) cooks. He still lives on junk food. He is now having home tutoring but only 8 hrs per week and I think only 2 of those are actually with an online tutor, the rest is working himself, if he actually does it. He barely had any friends before - since he rarely behaved in a friendly way - but I'm not sure he sees anyone now. You know, I don't like him and I'll never forgive him but you've got to feel sorry for him haven't you. 12 yrs old and virtually no education happening. He has hit his mum too, knocked her to the floor and is as big as her now, so I feel even more sorry for her. I didn't know what to say TBH (getting him together with DS is NOT an option) - I asked what CAHMS were doing about it but the answer seems to be it takes 3 or 4 weeks to get round to answer whatever query there was at the last meeting. She doesn't even feel she can say no to him now because he gets physical with her and trashes the place. Poor family.

My Stepsons went to CAHMS after they witnessed their Mum trying to kill their Dad, they didn't really help at all, they never gave any useful advice. They were nice enough but no practical help at all. The poor Mother, her life sounds hell.

Kidcat Everything is always a battle for you isn't it?

Well done on the test passing and non smoking and sorry to anyone I have forgotten.

PiC x