The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

Pooky

Afternoon all


SQ - Put your foot down - you have enough to deal with during half term and DH's exams without adding MIL to the mix.


Ginny - I hope you're feeling better soon. Some fresh air will help chase the bugs away.


It's alternating between sunning and thick swirly fog here today, the perils of living so close to the sea. The temperature changes are astounding too.


Got all my nets down this morning, cleaned the all but the kitchen windows (need to climb all over the work surfaces to do those and couldn't be arrised). Nets are now all back up and looking lovely and white (it's amazing how grubby they get with the cats keep rubbing round them) and the summer curtains are up, upstairs. Feels good to tick that off my mental list of "must do soon" jobs. Pity there's still so many on there....it's never ending.


DH jokes that he took early retirement after his accident 5 years ago but I know he'd love to go back to work at some point. We rub along quite well together on the whole, I have a lot of hobbies so tend to always have something on the go that I can take into another room if he wants to watch something and most days he's back in bed between 1-5pm so he's not "in the way". We seem to have a good routine for most things, it's just on his really bad days that everything goes to pot but there's always tomorrow to do anything that needs doing.


Right - work to do, best crack on.

paidinchickens

Hello everyone.

Can someone please tell me if there's something going on with the moon or they're fiddling with the water or something please

The weekend has been a nightmare with feuding neighbours. We are at the end of a long drive way, next door to me works 14 hours a day 6 days a week and wants to come home and collapse in a heap. Next door to her is a widower of about 12 months.

We are friends with both. DH has done all kinds of jobs for the widow (for free) and I thought we were friends. Next door had one of my cats so we are now family by law :rotfl:

The two fell out over the weekend as the widower and her visitors keep blocking next door in or out of her drive. She understands she has been through a rough time so she just knocks on the door and asks if (insert visitor of your choice) can move their car. She has been told yes I'll be there in a minute and 10 minutes later she is still waiting.

Things came to a head at the weekend and I had the heads up from next door that she had been arguing. When we got back home the widower raced round to me and said that next door had all but abused her and she had never met anyone so nasty in her life :eek:
She told me she never has any visitors and that she was a nasty liar.

Now stupidly I tried to explain that next door works long hours and we are always stuck on the drive as someone visiting her is always blocking us in and that it is ok for us as we work from home but next door works long hours. She went nuts! then said that her visitors (that she never has) only ever spend one or two minutes in the way and I explained that it could be possible that she feels it's a couple of minutes and next door feels like it's an eternity and this is where the problem lies..........

She stormed out of my house and said she wasn't having a street brawl :eek:

Next morning, the old fella across the road who is also a recent widower stopped me in the street and started shouting at me. I said this was not my argument and I will talk to him when he stops shouting at me. He then shouted he was a fellow widower and it was his duty to protect his fellow widowers........... I kid you not, he really said that! and my DH should stop accusing his friend of doing things she's not done........... eh? DH hasn't said a peep

Yesterday he stopped me again and said he was sorry and he had sorted everything out??? what?? what out?? later in the day I was on the field with some other dog walkers and then he put his back to me and never spoke ?????????





DH is just starting to come out of his breakdown and he has done nothing but help this woman out and now he is really upset that he is being accused of complaining when neither of us have said anything.

This morning I went to a jumble and bought a new to me dinner service which is in the car outside but widow 1 is sat on her drive so I've left it in the car half unpacked and I'm a prisoner in my own home!

I'm fed up with this as we have done nothing but support them both and the argument is nothing to do with us.

Crazy people

PS can someone nip out to my car for me :rotfl::rotfl:

paidinchickens

Sorry for the long post I must have cabin fever already

PiC x

candlelight_2013

PIC I am so sorry, talk about "piggy in the middle", they want you involved but won't take any notice of what you have to say.

Try as you will to stay out of it,they won't let you.

Is it a lovely dinner service? I do love nice china, I will come and get it for you from the car:)

Take care

Candlelightx

savingqueen

(((((((((((paidinchickens))))))))))))) I can see the steam coming out of your ears. Personally I would lie low for a while and see if it all simmers down. How awful to be caught up in all that and get shouted at and ignored. I read that its against the law to block someone in their own drive (ok to park if the drive is empty) but I take it you share a drive? If it doesn't blow over... could you orchestrate several friends/family/deliveries popping over to your house and blocking the whole blooming lot of them in for a bit.... she laughs evilly ...


I am flagging a bit now, just got to whip round the boys' room, get freshened up and off to school then round a friends for coffee/play with littlest... then back to school to pick up biggest and his mate then dash back to cook them dinner... big ones will be famished with PE, schools woods and after school gardening club


have been naughty today eating up all the odds and ends... and rather too many of them

Pyxis

May I ask, has she ever blocked you in? I can't quite work out the layout of the drive. I assume it's very narrow?

I must admit, there's nothing more annoying than coming home and finding you can't get into your own property. Not once, but a few times after you've asked nicely.

There seems to be a degree of misunderstanding about who said what to whom.

Also, if widow's visitors are parking across neighbour's pavement crossover, they are breach of some highway law.

Would it be at all possible for you to invite neighbour and widow in for a cup of tea and a chat, to sort it out? Each person could give their point of view. There may be some other stress factor in their life that made either widow or neighbour kick off, which, if revealed, could defuse the situation a bit.

It would be a shame to let it fester into a full scale permanent breach, especially as you would then be piggy -in -middle for ever. Best try nip it in the bud?

paidinchickens

Sorry I didn't want to make such an epic story line

It is a cul de sac drive if that make sense. One long drive and each persons drive come off the main drag.

The widow parks her car on her drive but only just so her car is that far out none of the other three houses can get out.

One house is in the RAF so he is never here so doesn't know. We work from home and if we're blocked in we just go and do something for a while until she has moved. Her family are quite rude though, she got locked out and DH said he would get in for her as you can get in with a kids brolly through the letter box to pull the handle. Two weeks later she is away and her sister stops us on the drive to ask where her sisters car is :eek: I panicked as I couldn't think of the last time I had seen it, she then went on to say that whoever had stolen the car knew how to break into the house to steal the keys!!!

The widows Son had the car as he sold his and was running around in it. She didn't even come and tell us she knew where it was.

Everyone has made allowances and next door only asked her to move so she could get passed and she said no...... which started the feud.

I said lets go and sort this and get them both together to which I was accused of telling everyone her business as I must have told next door she was only renting as how else would she know if I hadn't told her. I replied that she knew because she witnessed the mortgage papers for the previous tenants and there was a sign up saying to let.

I'm stuck between ....... is she and her whole family round the twist or is she suffering due to grief. If it is grief then no one has helped her as much as us from fixing her heating, tv, hoover, lighting etc down to opening every jam jar for her.

I'm really upset as she said I was causing the problem as my DS was on the drive way when he finished his driving lesson!!! We don't block anyone in as we are at the end.

I'm trying to avoid everyone but have the dogs to walk passed both their houses

Next door is back at work and she is upset that this was the first long weekend she has had off since Christmas and it was ruined.

PiC x

paidinchickens

The widow is at the beginning of the drive.

Next door witnessed previous tenants mortgage papers as they stopped renting and bought a house which is why they moved.

[Deleted User]

PIC I hope you and Mr PIC have stopped and had a nice calming cuppa by now. That old saying 'there's nowt so queer as folks' holds very true and when people who are usually good natured fall out with each other they, each and every one of them expect that any percieved allies will back them to the hilt. They just can't be rational when thier blood is up so you as neutrals get the tongue lashings and full broadsides of thier ire. I think in a couple of days when it has all calmed down and passed they will all feel slightly foolish and possibly a little ashamed of themselves for thier attitude towards you both and will be looking shamefaced. I wouldn't expect an appology necessarily but they might let the words and hurt slide under the carpet as it were and just carry on a normal conversation. If you can go along with it when that happens peace will be restored. I think you are wise not to take any side, and wise not to rise to the bait of thier bad manners, just be towards them as you always have been and they will most likely take the hint and life will be calm and OK again. In the meantime, just go about your daily lives as normal and don't let them get you involved in thier little dispute, you're worth more than that pet. Give Mr.PIC a hug and make him happy again, Lyn xxx.

paidinchickens

Lyn you always make me cry in a good way lol. Just some relief tears from getting it out I think.

Just as I'm typing she is telling one of the other neighbours about not being allowed to park on the drive as it causes too much trouble.

It's ok I will talk to the neighbours behind me and I will ask them if my four dogs and me can climb over their fence to get to the main street so I can keep out of the way :rotfl::rotfl:

PiC x