The OS Doorstep - a helpful and supportive thread in these tough times

nuttyp

Knitwitch its on a staircase programme with the housing association. It means they can buy extra % as they can afford it. its in units of 10% I think. If they decide to just own the half they can for up to 99 years.


Its better than renting, and at least they are thinking ahead.

Floss

NuttyP it's also security for them in case their landlord ever sold, and isn't it a lovely feeling when your kids start to settle down & do grown-up stuff like that?! I have to admit though that I do have to think about what we discuss now, rather than me just telling them what they should do! They are now both older than I was when I had them and I think they are both more mature too!

Possession

VJ'sMum, DH thinks he is on the spectrum too - it's something he realised when he was going through counselling. Although nothing will happen or change and he isn't pursuing anything officially it was a bit of a relief to know that he wasn't just "weird"! (His word not mine!) He had always felt different.

nuttyp

Floss I am exactly the same, I was 19 when I had DD and she is now 23, doesn't want children yet. The house she is currently renting the owners are getting divorced. No repairs have been done for over a year and there is a structural crack that is getting worse. TBH I am glad they are moving out. When they get their own house they can actually have colour on the wall other than magnolia!!

nuttyp

Everyone keep your fingers crossed for a nice day please. Me and DD are doing a carboot today, I know we are strange here and have them on Monday, Wednesday, Friday and sunday. Whatever we make it goes into DD carpet fund for the new house.

ivyleaf

Haven't got around to posting lately but I'm okay. Now that we're 60 i felt I should think about buying a pre-paid funeral plan, but am a bit shocked at the prices :eek: I will go and see a local family firm of funeral directors and see what they can sort out for me. Just got to pluck up the courage! I'm worried about spending so much money all at once, in case our ancient boiler breaks down or something, but I know our children wouldn't be able to afford to pay for our funerals.

I'm lucky enough to have some of my "lump sum" left from when I started getting my occupational pension, but what we're going to do about a funeral plan for OH, goodness only knows! I know you can pay in installments, but it still costs quite a lot per month. We'll see.

savingqueen - Thanks for the news about Cornish chick and her OH. I too am thinking of them every day.

Oh, your kitten is gorgeous kidcat! Is he a Ragdoll? My DGS's girlfriend has one and he's an adult now but still has a very quiet mew.

(((HUGS))) to everyone. xx

D&DD

VJ's mum just catching up and spotted your post re your DD..
My tuppenceworth is be guided by your DD and work with her strengths and help address her difficulties at her pace.
As you know my youngest has his diagnosis *officially* but my other two are definitely on the spectrum,most likely aspies, with the eldest being most affected.


I mention this because I haven't bothered with getting a diagnosis as they have,over the years learned to cope with their issues and as we are used to dealing with DS3 TBH the support they would have got in school etc would have been minimal in our borough.


It depends on what they do/want to achieve in their life,my eldest coped well with the structure of school and struggled since leaving as he has to have a solid routine and he did fall apart a bit so we supported him and encouraged him to seek work outside the home,he was working at home and becoming more OCD by the day.. He has now started work which has brought a whole lot more issues to bus timetables,work times etc but we are addressing them as they come each day..


I suppose its easier for me as I've never known it any different from living like this but I would suggest if your DD is looking at living away at Uni etc that she DOES go through diagnosis etc as she will need more support if not in the home environment.


It's so different for each and every person on the spectrum but they all have strengths which you have to grab on to and exploit as much as you can.


Hope I've helped a little at least XX

kidcat

Ivy - yes he is a raggie, and incredibly loving already. He has as usual for cats bonded to OH and has spent the night carrying OH glasses about, and then crying when he drops them
Funeral plans can be extraordinarily expensive, would it be a cheaper option to pay the money into a notice ISA account instead maybe in joint names with one of your children? That way you are earning interest on it and in a real emergency the money is still available to you?

Nutty - hope all goes well at the car boot, wish we had mid week ones here, would be ideal.

I have been to my doctor finally today, and been referred to the breast clinic for scan etc, apparently it takes two weeks, but OH will be taking the day off that day so he can answer the emergency call I am bound to get from one or other school
She has given me antibiotics in case its an absess but I am inclined not to take them, I have had any number of antibiotics in recent months, surely they would have cleared it?

Floss

kidcat wrote: »

...She has given me antibiotics in case its an absess but I am inclined not to take them, I have had any number of antibiotics in recent months, surely they would have cleared it?

Not necessarily - different drugs are designed to attack different bugs, so you may not have had one that can do abcesses, bizarre as it might sound!

savingqueen

Lovely kittie pic kidcat. Well done on the 24 hour rule re the parents. I have had emails from my sister lately and now MIL is posting various things to us, including a book for DH that he doesn't like at all and costs a huge amount of postage (heavy hardbook from EU.) I wonder if we will ever get any real peace from them all eh?

Great news SDG re your mislaid ring and nutty re DD's house.

Glad you had a lovely holiday monnagran - well deserved.

(((((((((((SDG)))))) and to kidcat, nutty and all the rest of us with mothers and MILS who don't deserve mother's day cards (and for some barely deserve the title of mum quite frankly)

Mar has put it succinctly - "PIC lots of people in here will know exactly how you feel. Mothers are not all nice homely cuddly best friends"

DH has NEVER sent his mother a MD card and I soon discovered why. I did feel sorry for her a couple of times and posted an alternative card but that didn't last long. She can be poisonous and is also very crafty, using her professional skills as a therapist to say/do things that emotionally hurt covered up with saccharine. I had her sussed a long time ago.

This is the 2nd year I won't be contacting my mum in any way, shape or form for MD. It is sad and I would feel just as upset sending a card as not sending one. Its harder with the guilt not sending anything but feels the right thing to do. In fact from this year I have stopped sending my sister & BIL, mum and dad anything to mark birthdays, Xmas, anniversaries etc as well. The money saved goes to different charities I support in the form of goods (foodbank) and money for the rest. PIC - just an idea, could you make a charity donation in your mother's name, pick something meaningful to either one of you depending on how you feel. You could let her know what you have done if you chose to.

PIC - to add, my sister is also treated in the same way as your brother and it is hurtful.

Sorry forgot who did the thoughtful post about us sending OUR love here to you on MD and I will be doing the same.

sq X