Turns out to be a different sex?????

beechescomposter

Scans in pregnancy have more in common with entertainment than a diagnostic tool and there is rarely any benefit to the parent or child in knowing the sex. The main benefit is to the companies offering the scans privately. The sinister side of this trade is that in some cultures female children are unwanted and the private scanning/entertainment industry is complicit in the deliberate termination of female pregnancies.
Ethical operators are aware of the possible consequences of disclosing the baby's sex and it is usually policy in NHS clinics that the sex is not disclosed.

inkie

And at the end of the day a USS is a diagnostic test, to determine fetal wellbeing.
In several yrs of midwidery practice, I have known of 'mis-sexing' - and that was in the days when it was not routinely done, e.g. a sonographer who was expecting got one of her colleagues as part of her USS to 'sex' the baby as a favour. They bought all pink, and yes, the baby was a boy - they wern't best pleased.
When i was having our 2, I could have found out, being staff - but did not want to. Nothing beats that 'its a ......' moment at delivery, whether you are having your own or delivering someone elses!

Savvy_Sue

Spendless wrote: »

OP- Has your wife had other children? Though I never asked to know the sex with any of them, with the one I lost and my eldest I had very strong feelings that they were boys and I was right. With youngest though convinced I was having another boy I didn't have the 'boy feeling' I'd had before, I just dismissed this as the feeling not being there this time and didn't think about it not being there cos it was a girl.

Is it possible that she has a strong feeling that this is a girl. Don't forget to let us know what you do have.

I wouldn't rely on strong feelings, I was SURE DS2 was going to be my Judith Mary - he felt so different to DS1. We only picked his name a day or two before the birth: "I suppose we'd better choose a boy's name, just in case, will PJ do?" "Yes, that will do." Poor lad.

Although with DS3 I was resigned to another boy ... and it took forever to find a suitable name!

dee_mum_of_3

ive found out the sex of our babies twice the first was a surprise and id say its best that way ...... at the end of the day its only one or the other theres not a great choice,i cant be sure but i think gentalia does develop around the16 week mark until then all babies have winkies if the genetic makeup determines a female the penis turns inside out to form the vagina(i think lord robert winston-my hero!!)explained this).........even if your told its a boy theres an element of what ifs but that could explain so many people who thought they were having boys and had girls ...the winkie theory?

jo1972

Curious_George wrote: »

It could be well worth the money for you to get a private 4D scan
there is no mistaking the genitals with one of those things... you can see them VERY clearly...
to see what i mean, look at this....http://www.ehd.org/science_imagegal_6.php
if you can see the face this well, there is going to be no mistaking a willy!
infact if you have a look through the videos i think you can see the sex clear as day at around 16 weeks

Oh God CG I really wish you hadn't posted that link, cos that's made me so broody!!

jo1972

I couldn't find out with my 1st but did with 2 and 3. I think if I had another (dh would pass out if he read that bit!), I would leave it as a surprise.

I worried constantly that they had got it wrong and I think it got in the way of enjoying my pregnancy to a certain extent, not overly but it was something I thought about (on a daily basis :eek:)

squashy

I didn't really want to find out the sex of my baby. however I changed hospitals at 27 weeks and the new place wanted to scan me for their records, by which time baby was quite big on the screen, there was a shot of it's legs and there was definately dangly bits between the legs (clearly not the umbilical cord either). Howeve rI didn't ask the sonographer to confirm as I thought it would be cheating lol. Now I am fully expecting to give birth to a boy and have even bought one or two bits of clothes if I have seen bargains. However in the back of my mind I still wory about looking a bit stupid if it turns out to be a girl- then I have only myself to blame too!!

thriftmonster

Well they're not allowed to tell you here in NI - we sort of knew with ds1 from the 20week scan - ie it was pretty obvious - and with ds2 I was so convinced he was a girl,I had bought several dresses and cardis and when he came out I asked the midwife if she was sure - she pointed out that at over 10lbs there wasn't a lot of room for doubt!!!!! And yet I was convinced he was a girl allthe way through the pregnanacy

Mics_chick

With my first I didn't want to know the sex at all but I really really thought I was having a boy and it was a girl :rolleyes: and I was really surprised in the delivery room but not bothered at all

But with the 2nd I really really wanted to know the sex "because I wanted to know what our family was going to be..." Don't know why I felt like that but that's the reason why I wanted to know whether our family was going to be 2 girls or 1 of each

We were told it was a boy but I didn't buy any boy things and the only stuff we had was what my mum bought :rolleyes:
I had a 4D scan privately instead of an amniocentesis because of the 1% risk of miscarriage with the amnio compared to no risk with a scan and partly because I wanted a 4D scan :rolleyes: It showed it was a boy...
I had 2/3 scans later in my pregnancy because he had enlarged kidneys and they all showed he was a boy too.

We were sure of the name we wanted for a boy nearly all the way through my pregnancy but were unsure about a girl's name so I discussed it with my OH on the way to the hospital to be induced a bit late but at least we had discussed it before and had 3/4 names in mind anyway. It's just when the baby was born I wanted to be as sure what we were calling her as we were for a boy The midwife actually wrote out name tags for either sex

He was born in January 2005 and there was a couple on the ward who had the opposite sex to what they were told. I'm not totally sure but I think it was a girl and they expected a boy. It was obviously a shock for them because there was an excited buzz around every other bed during visiting hours but everyone seemed to sit very quietly in their corner of the ward
I felt really sorry they were so disappointed but nothing in life is certain or guaranteed that's why I didn't rely on what I was told in case it was wrong

As it turned out I was diagnosed with PND after he was born anyway (I was OK after my dd ) so goodness knows what affect the "wrong" sex might have had on me if I had relied on it and it was the opposite :eek:

Curious_George_2

jo1972 wrote: »

Oh God CG I really wish you hadn't posted that link, cos that's made me so broody!!

sorry
but im surprised how many people have never heard of it or seen one, so i like to spread the word
our 4d scan should have been today but we had to put it back a few days...
only got to wait until tuesday though!
by this time in 3 days i will know who it is thats kicking up a storm in there

Just incase i didnt make it clear in my earlier posts though, i would NEVER trust a gender guess from an ordinary scan, not 100%
ive seen people pouring over thier scan pics looking for '3 lines' between the legs, ohhh must be a girl then.... :rolleyes:
unless i actually see the bits myself, im not buying anything pink or blue!