Real-life MMD: Should I shop my brother over his scratchcard win?

Former_MSE_Debs

Money Moral Dilemma: Should I shop my brother over his scratchcard win?

My brother borrowed £300 from our sister a year ago. He's just won £500 on a scratchcard and has asked me not to tell her as she'll ask for the money back and he wants to splash out. He's unemployed, so £300 would mean more to him than her, but I feel he should learn to pay his debts, especially as he didn't actually earn it.

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theblondebint

This is a bit of a no brainer really! Of course he should pay her back! If he owes her, then he can clear the debt & still have enough to splash out. If you don't want to tell her, then I think you should really lean on him to do the right thing, as if the tables were turned, I'm sure you'd want to know!

iclayt

I'd be telling him to look on it as a £200 win. He's still up on what he had before.

And yes, I'd tell my sister about it.

lynneinjapan

Agreed, he should pay her back - or at least offer to, and possibly agree a partial repayment if she's amenable to that - and THEN splash out with what's left. As idayt says, he'll still be at least £200 up.

Besides, if he needs to borrow money to get by then why is he spending it on scratchcards?

Edit: Just remembered that the question was whether you should grass him up. I'd say lean on him to tell her, and threaten to do so yourself if he doesn't.

flyingflea

If he's not going to pay her back after effortlessly winning £500, it doesn't sound like he'll ever pay her back. His circumstances doesn't make it right to hang on to it.

determined_new_ms

personally i don't think you should get involved, its not your business. the question wasn't should he pay the question was should you shop him. I definitely say no. However i would definitely tell him I don't appreciate being involved in this, keep my attention on my own affairs but if i was asked directly by my sister i wouldn't lie

scotsbob

As above, this doesn't involve you. What he does with his money is his concern, not yours.

Talent

It's OK saying don't get involved but what will the sister think of you when she finds out? I guarantee she will think less of you than she does of your errant bro'. Why did he involve you anyway? Why did he tell you of his win then said don't tell your sister? Hmmmm....

Segilla

Yes. Not only because paying back the money owed is the right, decent thing to do but he may need more money in future and will not get it if previous debts remain unpaid.

Ashagill

Yes, I think I agree that the debt should be paid off. I'm really sick of people I know, who have mounting debts, but never show any sign of paying them off. And carry on buying things, and saving up for holidays and that, when they have a debt hanging over them. Simply put, it's not their money. And it really makes me think badly of a person who is unwilling to see things from the point of view of the lender.
I was raised to always ALWAYS pay back debts first before keeping anything for myself. My Dad once lent me £20, and I could only afford to pay him back with birthday money from Aunties and Uncles. So grudgingly I took the birthday money and handed it to him. He took it, then put it back in my hand, saying "I just wanted you to learn that you had to pay back your debts first." And thus because I had done the right thing, he let me keep it. It's a lesson that has stayed with me my whole life.

cazpost

I don't think it is up to you to tell your sister,although if she does find out you knew it could cause bad feeling. He cetainly should tell her and offer to pay back what he owes.If she chooses not to take it that is up to her. The fact that he hasn't attempted to pay her anything in the last year coupled with the fact that he is still unemployed and yet spending money on lottery cards speaks volumes....................