Is it fair for me to have another baby?!

Missbookworm27

In a real dilemma at the moment as to whether to have a third child...
We have two very happy boys age 5 and 3, who currently share a bedroom and love it. They are very close. Hubby and I have been talking about having one more baby, I'd rather do this sooner rather than later as I don't want a big age gap between the two eldest and this baby. The problem is we live in a quite small 2 bed semi at the moment and I don't see us being able to afford to move Any time soon. We can just about fit a cot into our room and have space in the boys room for extra clothes etc. we have a lot if love to give and are really proud of how happy we have raised our two boys to be. I think I would regret not having another as u feel I'm just not ready to call it a day on babies! But is it unfair on the two we have already to bring another child into a small space?
Really appreciate some advice/ thoughts on this
Thanks!

mummyroysof3

Do they only need rooms just to sleep in? Have you plenty of downstairs space? Or room to extend rather than move(if you own it)?

Molly41

We moved bedrooms when third baby was due to go into seperate bedroom (plus 1 year old).

The kids had the big bedroom and we had the little room. It worked just fine and they loved sharing a room together.

There is never a good or bad time to have a baby x

[Deleted User]

Don't forget the other extra costs...

Can you afford to take more maternity leave?
Or send a toddler to nursery
Or transport them (do you need a bigger car for 3?)
Or take them on holiday
Or pay for school uniforms
Or school trips
Or an entire new wardrobe of clothes (if it's a girl)

thorsoak

I know only too well (we had 4 children :eek: ) that babies nos 3+ cost very little initially, because you have everything you can possibly need - but as they get older, the costs increase by more than one-third!

Are your careers such that you'll be able to afford the extra costs?? Especially as it seems as if benefits are on the decline!

However I do agree with Molly - there's never a "right" time to have a baby.

motherofstudents

Circumstances can change so although you can't afford to move at the moment, you may find in a few years that you will be able to. Could you convert the loft ? I think you are only going to regret it if you don't have the third baby and these reasons don't seem insurmountable.

fluffnutter

Have another baby. He or she won't grow up admonishing you for not providing enough space - babies know what they know. Life's too short to worry about how big your house is.

Threebabes

I would go for it. I have 3 :-)

Robin_TBW

Don't do it. If things are so happy then what's the point?

fluffnutter

Robin_TBW wrote: »

Don't do it. If things are so happy then what's the point?

Because she thinks another baby would make her happier. And so it might. Life has got to move forwards.

Missbookworm27

Thanks for the replies everyone, think I just needed some impartial advice!
We rent the house (but a family member owns it and they have offered to sell it to us in 4 years time when they want to sell and retire)
we could extend into the garage/ garden as our neighbour has done the same. We don't have masses of space, only a living room and kitchen downstairs (open plan though with dining table in) and we have always tried to keep things like toys organised so that we are not cluttered!
We can afford another baby, I work part time for the nhs (good mat leave pay!) and other half is a lecturer at a college (both stable jobs in my opinion).
Haven't kept a lot of baby things, have a cot/ Moses basket etc but would need to pay out for a new pram as our buggy is very worn after 5 years of use! I know a baby doesn't come cheap, that's another of my worries, we wouldn't be able to afford fancy holidays or anything. At the moment we manage to save a little each month, and have one or two camping type holidays each year. I don't like the thought of my boys missing out on experiences because we've chosen to have another baby.
Definitely agree that there never seems a right time!