Elderly parents and mobile phones - getting them to use or at least call

[Deleted User]

First off, given up trying to get him to use mobile phone I bought him. It just stays in the box and never used.

My Dad is 78, and live alone. But, I'm having difficulties trying to explain to him that calling my home phone is not the only option if he needs to get hold of me (especially if I'm not there!). I have a mobile.

Also, trying to explain to him that, if he needs something, he can can me anytime even when I'm at work (and, honestly, I won't get sacked for taking a personal call for 2 mins!).

I've told him, if its an emergency, he can phone me at work, at home, on mobile. If he wants to phone me otherwise, I get home from work at about 6ish but, if I don't answer then try my mobile. Cost not an issue - I will call him back.

But he doesn't. If for some reason, if I'm not there, he rings and rings and rings every 30 minutes. Sometimes its for stuff he's worried about for whatever reason.

Occasionally, we've been out to family meal or cinema or something, got home, put little one to bed and he's rung at 1030pm woken son up, and then been all flustered because he's been ringing all night and didn't know where I was.

He did it last night and was really stressed saying he though something had happened to us all because we weren't home! When I explained it all sunk in then.....

Last week, was the same, he refused to call me in work because 'I'd get in trouble' and worried all day about something. I work in an office and no amount of me telling him will make him listen when I say no-one will bat an eyelid. (He worked in a factory and it was a bit different I guess).

Its so infuriating. I try to explain to him that if he calls me at home and I'm not there, just call my mobile. Then he argues he can't do that I might be driving (although hes seen my hands-free kit!) or if I'm in work I might be busy! But then I tell him if I don't answer right away at least I know hes rung and will be able to call him back in 10 mins - which is better than phoning me for 4 hours on my home phone when I'm not even there!

As you can imagine, my wife is starting to get a little upset that hes calling so late for silly reasons which could easily be avoided if he just thought about things for a second (or listened when I tell him something!).

Any suggestions?

We're about to get rid of our home phone and replace it with an internet phone (which will mean change of phone no). Seriously tempted to tell him we're getting rid of completely so he has to phone my mobile anyway!

BTW - as I said cost not an issue. I always phone him back - and I've got plenty of free minutes....

Gigglepig

When you cancel land line just give him mobile number, explain that it is your new phone number.

I would also try to set up an auto dial on his phone if possilble & tape a card with your name mobile number to his phone.

In the meanwhile, can you divert calls from your landline to your mobile?

[Deleted User]

Gigglepig wrote: »

When you cancel land line just give him mobile number, explain that it is your new phone number.

I would also try to set up an auto dial on his phone if possilble & tape a card with your name mobile number to his phone.

In the meanwhile, can you divert calls from your landline to your mobile?

Dunno. Might be able to divert....

Still doesnt solve the problem that if its work hours, he just won't ring at all.

z.n

We have similar problems. No solution really-just sympathy.

74jax

I told my parents I had problems on my home number and had their home number barred to call my home. They then just used my mobile.

74jax

Could you program his phone so you are speed dial 1?

silvercar

Programme his phone to say Paul 1 for your home number and Paul 2 for your mobile. Then tell him to phone Paul 2 if he gets no answer on Paul 1.

LondonDiva

Been there! Particularly when trying to convince to ring me during work hours...

[Deleted User]

z.n wrote: »

We have similar problems. No solution really-just sympathy.

Thanks. Maybe I just don't understand how elderly peoples minds work. Eg.

1. Just because I'm not home when he rings does not mean there is something wrong. In fact,

a. Chances are slim that there is a problem.
b. Even if there is then theres nothing you can do

2. Why sit at home and worry about something which can usually be resolved within minutes by just one phone call?

3. Why not make an effort to make things easier for yourself as you get older? Especially when you've got a son who will help as much as he can...

[Deleted User]

74jax wrote: »

Could you program his phone so you are speed dial 1?

Won't do speed dial - refuses. Relies on a scrap of paper with phone numbers on.

[Deleted User]

LondonDiva wrote: »

Been there! Particularly when trying to convince to ring me during work hours...

Its nuts. I've only ever worked in an office but nowhere I've worked would anyone EVER EVER give a monkeys if someone's parent phoned them for 2 minutes whilst in work!

The only time he ever phone me in the day was at 12-30pm one day because 'I was on lunch and wouldnt get into trouble!'. Even then he'd had a letter at 9am that we was worried about and had stressed for 3 hours....