Why do couples who have been together years split up?

red_devil

A couple i know, who knew each other as teenagers then got married i n their early 30's and had one child are splitting up. I feel sad and shocked they were the sort of couple you would thought would stay together forever etc. They built a nice home, their son is now grown up and the house in on the market. I believe there is nobody else involved just going their separate ways?

Why just putting it up for discussion. Feel like why?

Kayalana99

Maybe because they were teenages when they got together and they've grown into diff people? only they could really answar this for you x

Person_one

Presumably, because they weren't happy anymore.

These things are rarely simple, there's probably no single clear cut reason. Does there need to be? It is sad, but its sadder for them than for you so just focus on being a good friend to both.

kingfisherblue

I was with my ex for 19 years, married for 16. We have three children together. I thought my marriage was for life.

We split up when he had an affair and decided to move away and start a new family with her.

I've now been on my own with the kids for over eight years, and the kids still see their dad regularly. He has changed, and most of our joint friends won't speak to him and haven't done for years. A few have commented on his personality transplant, as he is not the lovely person he once was.

red_devil

they were the last couple on earth you thought would part though?

Person_one

red_devil wrote: »

they were the last couple on earth you thought would part though?

That's life, sometimes. Only the two of them know exactly what their relationship has been like.

LEJC

Sometimes people drift through life and if children are involved its sometimes more difficult to make the break...I know quite a few couples who have got their kids through school and called it a day.

One friend said she felt that she wasnt doing what she wanted anymore and the relatonship had become stale/complacent/too comfortable etc so she needed to feel that she was living rather than existing

most of the couples I know have remained friends but just gone on to a new life,some with and some without new partners.

podperson

red_devil wrote: »

they were the last couple on earth you thought would part though?

Tbh a lot of couples can look 'perfect' to an outsider but only they will know what goes on behind closed doors and how they really feel about each other. I'm sure that after so many years and a child together it's not a decision they would have taken lightly but if they're no longer making each other happy then it's probably the best one for them.

Hezzawithkids

You can never know what goes on behind closed doors. They may have grown adept as presenting a united front to the world but struggling in private. As others have said, there could be all kinds of reasons for the split.

pollyanna24

Kids is the answer for me and my ex.

Were together 9 years before having our first daughter.

He left me after 11 years (when our eldest was 2 and the youngest 2 months). Now I thought after all that time together, he wouldn't leave me in that situation, but I guess it shows you can never know someone enough!

CH27

red_devil wrote: »

they were the last couple on earth you thought would part though?

Nobody knows what goes on behind closed doors.