How much should grown up children contribute to household

miss_kc

Hi hope someone can help. My son is 22, working and living at home I have asked him to start paying board and lodgings as I have just taken early retirement, my income reduced and I am a single parent. I looked online and couldn't find any real guidance on what he should pay but from individual postings I saw 30% of earnings seems to be the general consensus, which is what I used to pay. However, he thinks that is is outrageously high. I am not looking to make a profit from him however I do need him to contribute as I can't continue to subsidise him. Any suggestions on a fair compromise?

Treevo

Work out what he costs you and then it should be that.

kingfisherblue

I take into account the fact that my daughter is paying for a car - necessary for work as she does shifts and there is no direct public transport - and the high cost of insurnace for young people. I also don't want to make a profit, just enough to cover costs. She pays £40 a week. This still gives her enough money to save, which she does.

Kayalana99

I think it shouldn't be based on what he earns unless he is on pennies..in which case you'd be helping him out by not charging him to much.

I think generally most people charge between £100-£200 as parents but if you want to charge him the 'going rate' then I'd think about what you'd charge a lodger...add food in assuming your buying that at some reasonable rate....maybe give him abit of leeway as he is your son though if you do it that way ... ?

It all depends on how you feel as my Dad charged me £270 but I got two downstairs rooms to myself with my own bathroom but on my mums side they all !!!!!ed and tried to tell me he was ripping me off...but my Dad would of happily let me live upstairs in the small bedroom he had for £50 a month so I saw it as a choice of luxery I could afford.

RAS

Starting point

Get all your bills out, utilities, council tax etc. What do they cost in total. Halve them.

What is the LHA rate for a a shared room for under 35s in your area,.

Add the two together.

That is assuming he buys all his own food and either cooks half the meals or cooks for himself and does all his own washing and ironing and helps cleaning.

LEJC

Ask him to find out how much it would cost him to live in a flat and employ someone to cook his meals and do his washing ...suddenly the amount you suggest might become more palatable to him...afterall at 22 he really should be able and willing to contribute to the household.

podperson

I think he needs to grow up tbh. He's an adult and should be contributing, and 30% of earnings on rent and bills is much much lower than he'll ever get anywhere else. If he disagrees get him to start pricing up what it would cost him to move out and pay his bills. If he'd like a comparison my rent and bills are 83% of my wages - and that's before I even start with food and travel expenses. Can I come and live with you? :rotfl:

Bennifred

My grown up children contibute £50 per week each - this covers their food and a share of the household bills (gas, electricity, water, internet). They also do their share of cooking/housework/laundry etc. They know they're getting a good deal (no rent!) as they have lived away from home in the past.

Wicked_witch

Depends what 30% is really- if it's 500 a week that's a bit high, lol, if it's 50-60 about right, depending on your circumstances, bills, how often he eats at home and uses the utilities etc.

BitterAndTwisted

This subject comes up on a regular basis and has proven to be rather contentious!

Some parents feel that their kids should pay a percentage of their incomes and others feel that parents should never exploit their little darlings and should therefore not charge them a single penny.

What you decide to do should be based on your own circumstances, and it sounds like subsidising your own child is out of the question. And why should you? He's twenty two not a school-kid.

I would have a look on the RightMove and SpareRoom websites for an idea of what it could cost your son to rent a room in a flat or house-share and go from there. Food and utility costs should be shared 50/50 plus the single person's occupancy discount which you are losing on your Council Tax bill.

If my own parents spelled it out to me in those terms at the time I wouldn't have resented what they decided to charge me to live at home. What I paid them a week (which included food and laundry) turned out to be only my rent when I moved out.

Amfodyndad

Totally down to the individuals! It's not one rule fits all. Some parents will ask for a contribution, some won't. When I lived at home after university for a couple of years my parents never asked me for a single penny, and I'd like to think I would be the same with my kids if they were to live with me when they were 'grown up'.