When friends split up

Funky_Bold_Ribena

Invite the kid. End of.

krlyr

stuckinthemiddle123 wrote: »

See this is what I originally thought, and I am sure he will be ok with it. But then I thought why should I be dictated over what to do by her? Which is why then I thought that we should invited both. But in doing that in effect we are inviting him and not her, as she won't come.

No you're not, you're inviting them both. She's choosing not to come - that's beyond your control so don't take blame/feel guilty for her decision.

meritaten

I don't see the problem - its a CHILDRENS party. you invite the child(ren) and whoever is the custodial parent brings them. or do you normally invite adults without children?
Why on earth is this not obvious to you? its is your CHILDS party - you invite children your CHILD is close to! The child who seems to be forgotten in all this hoohaa over YOUR friends! you and your wife need to consider your child - grow up!!!!!!!!!!!!

Treevo

My rule is that the person who tries to make me choose loses. Always. It's never failed me.

Treevo

meritaten wrote: »

I don't see the problem - its a CHILDRENS party. you invite the child(ren) and whoever is the custodial parent brings them. or do you normally invite adults without children?
Why on earth is this not obvious to you? its is your CHILDS party - you invite children your CHILD is close to! The child who seems to be forgotten in all this hoohaa over YOUR friends! you and your wife need to consider your child - grow up!!!!!!!!!!!!

How many one year olds have friends of their own? I don't know about you but at one, it was pretty much all adults here. But maybe you have super duper genius kids. Aged one.

Pixiechic

You shouldn't have to choose and you don't have to choose.

They are adults and they should be able to behave well at a children's party.

The issue of their relationship is theirs alone, why get involved?

meritaten

Treevo wrote: »

How many one year olds have friends of their own? I don't know about you but at one, it was pretty much all adults here. But maybe you have super duper genius kids. Aged one.

actually they had quite a few! and I don't think they were super duper geniuses. neighbours babies and cousins and siblings made a lovely little birthday party. It was about the children - not the adults! and the children were all aged about 1 -5 and kids the birthday child knew and liked.
I just get the impression that this 1st birthday party is more for the 'adults' than for the baby.

Bella73

To be honest I'd be more inclined to invite him as at least he bothered to go to the Christening.

Invite them both and let her throw her tantrum, she won't come but she was invited.

Treevo

meritaten wrote: »

actually they had quite a few! and I don't think they were super duper geniuses. neighbours babies and cousins and siblings made a lovely little birthday party. It was about the children - not the adults! and the children were all aged about 1 -5 and kids the birthday child knew and liked.
I just get the impression that this 1st birthday party is more for the 'adults' than for the baby.

So when your kids were one you only invited other children that they 'knew and liked'?:rotfl:

You come out with some stories!

marisco_2

lostinrates wrote: »

I have moved on from my ex's too. I am in a very happy marriage. BUT at least one of them I really wouldn't want to spend an afternoon with at a social event.

You raise some good points. I would rather not spend any time with my ex at any social event either. Though to be honest if we had both been invited to something important like a christening, I would like to think I could happily go along and celebrate with friends, regardless that he was there. I would be civil and socailly polite, so as there was no obvious tension or atmosphere between us, however I wouldn't talk much to him beyond basic pleasantries. It might not feel comfy but it is doable and means that both people can maintain valuable friendships. Something that is very important to me.