Delete thread please!

lostinrates

jellyhead wrote: »

I'm one of the few women who find it painful and uncomfortable. My cervix is tilted, so I don't know if that makes it more likely to be uncomfortable or if I'm just a wimp.

Anyway, last time I went my GP told me tilt my chin down, so I was looking at my chest. Apparently that relaxes whichever muscles I was tensing. I also find it helpful to have a large ring or bracelet or something for my hands to fiddle with rather than gripping the couch.

I'm another who takes a pad to wear afterwards, as I always bleed. My GP told me I could take ibprofen an hour beforehand too, to help with pain. I know it's not meant to hurt, and most women barely notice, but it hurts me.

Obviously it hurts less than colposcopy and treatment, they gave me valium to relax me for that. I asked the GP beforehand. She gives it to me when I'm going to have a coil inserted too.

Hmm, interesting about the cervix, I have a retroverted uterus....could it be a common factor in discomfort?

Fwiw though today was much less bad than I remember them being. I had forgotten I bled before too till you said that, this time I did not. I do have a mild dull ache. But nothing worse than I might have after doing things I choose to do. I would certainly not be put of by any off this, I do think its I portent to be honest though and say they are not 'nothing' for everyone. But this is so near nothing it's really not worth worrying about.

I am not bothered by the ky jelly issue:o. The only time I found enough to make me wish I had taken a pantyliner or someone was for internal scans. That time I remember having to nip straight to the ladies partly because I really needed to but also to wipe away some ky.

Now I'm even MORE embarrassed that I am obviously abnormal in my KY jelly I reaction. You see, here I was thinking this was all nothing to be embarrassed about and I've now got a ky jelly complex and a note in my diary to get a vajazzle and a pedicure in three years time.

valk_scot

lostinrates wrote: »

Hmm, interesting about the cervix, I have a retro berthed uterus....could it be a common factor in discomfort?

Fwiw though today was much less bad than I remember them being. I had forgotten I bled before too till you said that, this time I did not.

I am not bothered by the ky jelly issue:o. The only time I found enough to make me wish I had taken a pantyliner or someone was for internal scans. That time I remember having to nip straight to the ladies partly because I really needed to but also to wipe away some ky.

Now I'm even MORE embarrassed that I am obviously abnormal in my KY jelly I reaction. You see, here I was thinking this was all nothing to be embarrassed about and I've now got a ky jelly complex and a note in my diary to get a vajazzle and a pedicure in three years time.

I've got a tilted cervix too and I don't find smears painful, nor do I bleed. So it's not inevitable.

Maybe my practice nurse is just particularly lavish with the KY jelly of course because one ends up awash with the stuff. I do nip to the loo afterwards as well but still, damp knickers for the rest of the day are not pleasent, it's easier to take a precautionary pad.

Don't forget to shave your legs too btw! The nurse will be black affronted if you go in with hairy legs, it will totally ruin her day.

lostinrates

valk_scot wrote: »

I've got a tilted cervix too and I don't find smears painful, nor do I bleed. So it's not inevitable.

Maybe my practice nurse is just particularly lavish with the KY jelly of course because one ends up awash with the stuff. I do nip to the loo afterwards as well but still, damp knickers for the rest of the day are not pleasent, it's easier to take a precautionary pad.

Don't forget to shave your legs too btw! The nurse will be black affronted if you go in with hairy legs, it will totally ruin her day.

Of course, totally I shaven legs.

I bet nurses who do this are totally up to date with whatever the 'hairdressing vogue de jour' is too.

Lagoon

jellyhead wrote: »

My dentist has a giant 'where's wally' poster on the ceiling

Mine used to, and he would ask in quite a patronising voice if I'd found him.

This was fine when I was eight or nine, though I thought it a little strange as he sounded like he was talking to a toddler, though when I got into my teenage years I started to find it more than a little weird...

'I'm not five, and of course I found Wally - he hasn't moved in the last six years!'

Thank goodness smear tests don't come with similar treatment...

jellyhead

I never found him! I wonder if he was actually in it, maybe dentists have a special one where you can't actually find him ... or maybe I'm just rubbish at it!

I never considered vajazzling and whatnot before now ... I hope that when I see my GP at toddler groups etc. she's not thinking 'there's that woman with a scruffy lady garden'...

heartbreak_star

I can honestly say I've never known a nurse bat an eyelid at any variation of ladygarden or decoration therein.

Except piercings. Those tend to provoke questions!

HBS x

pigpen

Hell, they'd need a machete to get near mine... lol...

Torry_Quine

jellyhead wrote: »

I'm one of the few women who find it painful and uncomfortable. My cervix is tilted, so I don't know if that makes it more likely to be uncomfortable or if I'm just a wimp.

Anyway, last time I went my GP told me tilt my chin down, so I was looking at my chest. Apparently that relaxes whichever muscles I was tensing. I also find it helpful to have a large ring or bracelet or something for my hands to fiddle with rather than gripping the couch.

I'm another who takes a pad to wear afterwards, as I always bleed. My GP told me I could take ibprofen an hour beforehand too, to help with pain. I know it's not meant to hurt, and most women barely notice, but it hurts me.

Obviously it hurts less than colposcopy and treatment, they gave me valium to relax me for that. I asked the GP beforehand. She gives it to me when I'm going to have a coil inserted too.

Interesting my uterus is tilted and I find smears very uncomfortable at best and do tend to bleed as well.:o

valk_scot wrote: »

I've got a tilted cervix too and I don't find smears painful, nor do I bleed. So it's not inevitable.

Maybe my practice nurse is just particularly lavish with the KY jelly of course because one ends up awash with the stuff. I do nip to the loo afterwards as well but still, damp knickers for the rest of the day are not pleasent, it's easier to take a precautionary pad.

Don't forget to shave your legs too btw! The nurse will be black affronted if you go in with hairy legs, it will totally ruin her day.

Have never felt the need to shave my legs specially. If it's in the winter then they never get shaved.

happy_to_be_here

A smear isn't particularly invasive, it's slightly uncomfortable but I'm glad they offer them early up here or my pre cancerous cells wouldn't have been detected for 6 years. I got them treated and I'm now pregnant with my first baby. The 'what if' part of me wonders if I would even be here if it hadn't been picked up.

valk_scot

Torry_Quine wrote: »

Have never felt the need to shave my legs specially. If it's in the winter then they never get shaved.

I was being a bit tongue in cheek about the leg shaving actually. I never bother with mine in the winter either. I think the most effort I've ever gone to for a smear, apart from looking out my big skirt, is to make sure I have a really good shower in the morning with particular attention to my ladybits.