reigning my 3 year old in

MortgageMamma

I'm rather embarassed at admitting all that to be honest, but I think there is so much pressure on us to be perfect mums, model wives, good earners and then we have to think about keeping in with our friends. I often wonder if men feel the same strain. For example in my house I am the main bread winner and can work a 16 hour day. I am almost 100% responsible for the kids due to hubbys working hours. We have two dogs a bull and a cow. And I am responsible for running a business which is highly regulated and creates volume paperwork. I barely have time to paint my nails or get my haircut let alone look like some godess wife thingy. Is this normal because my mum says it is not! Does anyone else live like this?

When I was little my mum used to send me out to play and I only came in for food and drink before it got dark and my dad came to find me and I was usually messing about near the river! Back then everyone kept an eye on everyone else's kids and I don't remember there being so many child abductions and I might be wrong but could a family survive on just a mans wages in those days?

Whinge over!

absolutebounder

Carmina_Piranha wrote: »

ab - i shouldn't have implied that female children have better communication skills anyhow, there's always somebody ready to pounce!

Dont worry I only used that as an example of how easy it is to say something a child can mis interpret that an adult is less likely to. I wasnt pouncing and could find others in the thread. No parent is perfect and I think much of the problem is that with both parents often working not enough time is spent with the child these days. We allow the TV to be the parent and teacher which is not all bad but not all good either as even on kids channels there can be a lot of violence I think I am going to be hypocritical when I talk about violence because I loved tom and jerry and capatin pugwash. Still they were just cartoons I say to myself, Never did understand why they took of captain pugwash. What was wrong with names like Seaman stains, Master bates and roger the cabin boy? I never saw i what the fuss was about which shows how pure childrens minds are compared to their adult counterparts.

MortgageMamma

But the question is, was the mind of the writer and producer of that programme honest and pure or did he name those characters for some self amusement? How long did it take to spot the names.

Nicki

The Captain Pugwash thing is a great story but sadly also an urban myth! The creators sued a magazine a few years ago for repeating the story, which I must admit I first heard about 20 years ago, so its been live for a while. I can't remember the names of all the characters but I do recall that the cabin boy was called Tom and it was Master Mates not Master Bates.

We perhaps need to be a little bit careful about rehashing it here, in case Martin finds himself on the wrong end of a libel suit, hence why I'm being a kill joy and spoiling the fun here.

Kimitatsu

Hi Guys

Some fantastic points here, but first of all counting pennies you are doing a great job! I like you had morning sickness for the first 20 weeks of pregnancy with my second one and it is totally draining.

Can I also make the point that boys are different to girls? They have different ways of testing themselves and to me he sounds like a perfectly normal 3 year old, mine went through the biting kicking being obnoxious stage and have lived to be 10 and 8 without managing to get an ASBO or be brought home by the police after the 8 o'clock watershed! (that was a joke by the way!!)

I found a really good book was "raising boys" by Steve Biddulph (I think thats the correct spelling) it explains how boys are different to girls and the differing times that different hormones kick in, and the effect that it has on them. I still dip into it now and then, and it enables me to take a step back and look at it a bit more logically.

Having said that I am not a perfect parent, a couple of years ago I went on a pernting course which was great but MM just like you now and then I lose my rag. I dont think there is any harm in kids understanding that sometimes if you cross that line there is a consequence that will come from it.

You should all stop beating yourselves up and look at the fantastic job you are doing with your kids (asleep is a good time because they cant answer back!) give yourselves a pat on the back and start again tomorrow - no one ever gives you a manual with your kids and they are all unique.

Counting_Pennies_2

Nicki wrote: »

I'd be surprised then if TV is a factor at all.
I hope you didn't think I was assuming you did let your child watch adult stuff.

Hi, very kind of you to post, not thinking you were criticising in the post at all. I think I only posted my comment about the tv just to prove a point to Mr 'all parents who ask a question = bad parents'

I must stop letting someone insensitive get to me.

Thanks for your help

Carmina_Piranha_3

don't let anyone get to you - your son sounds like a darling, i love your description of him being gentle with babies. this aggression will pass once he gets to school i'm sure, he's just finding his way around a group of other kids his own age and i'm sure some of them are more aggressive than he is, especially if they have older brothers.