Separated, how much should I provide?

kelpie35

Jack can I please ask you go and see your doctor ASAP.

I know you are trying to be strong and work your way through this.

I hope you still have the support of friends. You need to speak through your fears, frustrations and anger with them if you are not willing to go and see the doctor.

19lottie82

How the heck does she manage to spend £200 on petrol a month when she doesn't have a job to go to and the kids make their own way to college?! I have a FT job 10 miles away and do a fair bit of running about taking my OH's DD's to dance classes along with other journeys and I only spend £100!

duchy

19lottie82 wrote: »

The son is 19. Why should Jack be paying the bill for his top of the range I phone, or whatever other phone costs £41 a month?

He doesn't even live with his mother so they should be disregarded anyway.

Treevo

19lottie82 wrote: »

The son is 19. Why should Jack be paying the bill for his top of the range I phone, or whatever other phone costs £41 a month?

Because he would have paid it otherwise and so is at the very least morally obligated to until the contract is at an end. And the son isn't 19.

kelpie35 wrote: »

There both of an age where they can get part time jobs which would help to buy their own clothes and fund their own hobbies.

This may or may not be possible. What's absolutely right is that Jack does his best to ensure that his children are not negatively affected by his actions. Not just for their sakes but for his too if he ever wants to have a relationship with them again.

Treevo

duchy wrote: »

He doesn't even live with his mother so they should be disregarded anyway.

Nonsense. The money should be paid to his grandparents or to his son directly.

Gigervamp

Crikey, £2400 a year on *holiday* costs. Where's she planning on going, Belize?

Treevo

Gigervamp wrote: »

Crikey, £2400 a year on *holiday* costs. Where's she planning on going, Belize?

She'd be lucky to get to a semi-decent hotel in the Costa del Hell for that!

I know this is MSE and everything but in the real world where people don't spend £2.56 on food for a fortnight for 14 people and attack anyone who dares question the 'Way of Thrift', her budget doesn't seem that bad. Especially not when the family had a reasonable income.

Mojisola

Treevo wrote: »

I know this is MSE and everything but in the real world where people don't spend £2.56 on food for a fortnight for 14 people and attack anyone who dares question the 'Way of Thrift', her budget doesn't seem that bad. Especially not when the family had a reasonable income.

But that same income now has to fund for two households so cuts have to be made.

carolan78

19lottie82 wrote: »

How the heck does she manage to spend £200 on petrol a month when she doesn't have a job to go to and the kids make their own way to college?! I have a FT job 10 miles away and do a fair bit of running about taking my OH's DD's to dance classes along with other journeys and I only spend £100!

She travels down south to her parents.

I don't think it is for Jack to fund this though, it is her choice how often she makes that journey.

Treevo

Mojisola wrote: »

But that same income now has to fund for two households so cuts have to be made.

Absolutely right, but the question is what's reasonable. Let's remember that this woman lost her husband and her future overnight when he left. She's probably still devastated and only just beginning to tap into her fury.

Is she being unreasonable - yes. Is Jack running the risk of being equally as unreasonable - I think so.