Separated, how much should I provide?

Gigervamp

Ah right, I get you now.

justme111

For the sake of half of those 300 odd pounds difference I would probably not argue.

JackRS

justme111 wrote: »

For the sake of half of those 300 odd pounds difference I would probably not argue.

I'm loosing the strength to do anything much. She found a cheaper online one which I've agreed to, trying to choose my battles wisely. Thing is as she's expecting a greater proportion of house sale proceeds (probably all of it), she'll be greatests affected by the charge as it's deducted from the proceeds.

justme111

JackRS wrote: »

I'm loosing the strength to do anything much. She found a cheaper online one which I've agreed to, trying to choose my battles wisely. Thing is as she's expecting a greater proportion of house sale proceeds (probably all of it), she'll be greatests effected by the charge as it's deducted from the proceeds.

All ?!
Hmm
Do not think so.
Never mind .
Que sera sera , life is good anyway , enjoy the sun and your.new place x

RAS

JackRS wrote: »

I'm loosing the strength to do anything much. She found a cheaper online one which I've agreed to, trying to choose my battles wisely. Thing is as she's expecting a greater proportion of house sale proceeds (probably all of it), she'll be greatests affected by the charge as it's deducted from the proceeds.

I would have agree to the cheaper deal but advised that if there are additional costs above the "quote" which exceeded £350, she pays for them.

RAS

JackRS wrote: »

Daughters course ends July 2014.

OK. This is a potential game changer; I understood from your previous posts that her course ended in July 2013 (maybe different interpretations of "next summer").

I mention before that I was concerned that DD's support would fall between stools because it was possible that you might not be responsible for providing support (CSA would end on 20th birthday) and mum cannot claim benefits after 20th birthday (and may not have been able prior to that but you would need more expert advice on that).

Exactly what level of course is DD studying? Can you tell me the title of the course (BTEC National, HND, City and Guilds etc NOT the subject). Might be able to advise you more effectively if you provide that.

RAS

JackRS wrote: »

I am sorry you feel like that. It is not my intention to be unreasonable, intimidating or make you distressed. In fact I was trying to resolve this amicably by making you aware of how serious the situation is becoming. I didn’t have to email you but wanted to give you the opportunity to put this right before it escalates out of our control.

I cannot believe that if your new solicitor is on holiday that there is no-one else looking after your interests in the meantime. It's a big firm and there must be other solicitors available. I would not be happy to be treated like that if I was their client. It sounds very much like a delaying tactic by you/them as has been the case all along.

I am simply telling you that we cannot manage on the money you are providing at the moment, explaining why and warning you of the consequences . Do you really want me to get the children to ask you for more money to pay the household bills, food, petrol etc?

I get the feeling that there is a little bit of passive aggressive behaviour in here; you ask her to make arrangments to stand on her own two feet, so rather than learn how to look after herself, she does nothing and then expects you to pick up the pieces?

For example not applying for single person discount on CT, which would cover the phone DD? And apparently not applying for CTB or JSA?

What I still do not understand is what she spends money on if her supermarket bill is £400 as you suggested previously?

kelpie35

RAS wrote: »

I get the feeling that there is a little bit of passive aggressive behaviour in here; you ask her to make arrangments to stand on her own two feet, so rather than learn how to look after herself, she does nothing and then expects you to pick up the pieces?

For example not applying for single person discount on CT, which would cover the phone DD? And apparently not applying for CTB or JSA?

What I still do not understand is what she spends money on if her supermarket bill is £400 as you suggested previously?

Have to agree with you RAS.

I would really like to know where all the money goes too.

A big majority of people have to manage on half that amount per month.

I just don't know how Jack has managed to keep so dignified, I know I certainly could not.

JackRS

RAS wrote: »

OK. This is a potential game changer; I understood from your previous posts that her course ended in July 2013 (maybe different interpretations of "next summer").

I mention before that I was concerned that DD's support would fall between stools because it was possible that you might not be responsible for providing support (CSA would end on 20th birthday) and mum cannot claim benefits after 20th birthday (and may not have been able prior to that but you would need more expert advice on that).

Exactly what level of course is DD studying? Can you tell me the title of the course (BTEC National, HND, City and Guilds etc NOT the subject). Might be able to advise you more effectively if you provide that.

It's BTEC level music course that you needed 5 GCSE's to get onto. Althought she'd had A-levels etc and was 19 when started so older than the others on it.

JackRS

RAS wrote: »

I get the feeling that there is a little bit of passive aggressive behaviour in here; you ask her to make arrangments to stand on her own two feet, so rather than learn how to look after herself, she does nothing and then expects you to pick up the pieces?

For example not applying for single person discount on CT, which would cover the phone DD? And apparently not applying for CTB or JSA?

What I still do not understand is what she spends money on if her supermarket bill is £400 as you suggested previously?

Tell me about it.....