Back and Feeling rather ashamed!

blackangeluk

Thank you honey for kick up butt! It was quite a DFW evening as we got bus to friends, visited off licence en route to buy cheap(ish) vodka, drank said vodka at friends and got bus home (DH bought a return ticket and was very proud of himself!)

The rabbit was the NOT DFW style but she is a babe - I had a house rabbit years ago but it killed the guinea pig so not doing that again I want her to come and sleep in the bed with me but not so sure my dog and two cats would welcome her with open arms :rolleyes: rather with open jaws I would suspect!

Good for you on running and gym front, I've been doing pilates and swimming as well and really enjoying it, managed to lose about half a stone as well so think it might make my legs go a bit quicker

Have purchased (from £1 shop please note!) some pink ears for me and friend to wear in North Run - speaking to a friend today who has done it before however and I am now petrified of the hills enroute - so you may see a pink eared lady walking

I'll try and get on gmail tomorrow for a chat

Sweet dreams x

pania

hope you're colleague hasn't hid it all in a draw again!!! he he he he.
OK, i get paid on tueday 25th. We can add to our wages with ebay matched betting the usual really and the one to have the most remaining at the end of the month wins. I will aim to have £100 remaining in my account at the end of the month to overpay on my debts. how about if we each report in the day before payday next month but we keep each other motivated here in the meantime!!

sorry about the christmas/new year thing, feeling in a "she craaaaazy lady" mood!!

ZTD

pania wrote: »

I used to have a bunny that lived in my garden, bought him as a mid sized rabbit, yeah righto, shop had one over on me that day!! he grew mahoosive!!

That's no problem - buy a bigger pot...

blackangeluk

redsquirrel80 wrote: »

Ooh and yep BA we wanna see the bunny!

I will take a picture tomorrow for you, but you might just steal her because she is ace. Bless my DH though, he wandered off with DD looking at gerbils and returned to find me and DS sat in the rabbits choosing one - and how can you ignore a 3 year old pleas (and a 33 year olds for that matter) :rotfl:

I fancy the money left at the end of the month (apart from mine is -£ this month) but October I am going to be officually tight!

Hugs for first day back at work - its like your first day back at school when you forget how to hold a pen - or was that just me

pania

ZTD wrote: »

That's no problem - buy a bigger pot...

so THATS why the vet didn't give him back!!:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

pania

blackangeluk wrote: »

Have purchased (from £1 shop please note!) some pink ears for me and friend to wear in North Run

careful hun ZTD'll have you in a pot!! :rotfl: :rotfl:

working from home tomorrow so around all day, txt or e-mail me if you're free for a gmail.

Lets go with the challenge then, squirrel, me and angel, may the best lady win!!:D

redsquirrel80

pania wrote: »

hope you're colleague hasn't hid it all in a draw again!!! he he he he.
OK, i get paid on tueday 25th. We can add to our wages with ebay matched betting the usual really and the one to have the most remaining at the end of the month wins. I will aim to have £100 remaining in my account at the end of the month to overpay on my debts. how about if we each report in the day before payday next month but we keep each other motivated here in the meantime!!

sorry about the christmas/new year thing, feeling in a "she craaaaazy lady" mood!!

Eek, I'd forgotten about the drawer, I'll check it first thing. Saw some of my workmates on Friday and they said "your work was piling up so we were going to do some of it, but, er..." :rolleyes:

Right, you're on for the end of the month! I don't do MBing but I've got a few things I can ebay and some surveys due to pay up soon so fingers crossed! It'll motivate me to be careful with my spending anyway!

BA - my first proper pet was a rabbit, me and my mum went to have a look at gerbils or hamsters and fell in love with her, brought her back home on the bus A couple of years later we adopted a tiny little runt of the litter from some friends who let theirs breed, when we got her I could hold her in the palm of my hand, but she grew into a giant monster rabbit!

Thanks for the hug and yep I'll probably spend the morning trying to remember what my passwords are, where everything is, what I actually do... :rotfl:

ZTD

pania wrote: »

careful hun ZTD'll have you in a pot!! :rotfl: :rotfl:

Ooer missus...

pania

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: x

pania

Well I am speechless, I really don't know what to think and my mind is in turmoil.
Firstly with my background history. My Father that i speak about in this log has bought me up since age 4. The useless piece of sperm that was my dad left my mother when i was 1 for another woman.
In my mind my Father, for all our problems is just that and i love him immensely and in my mind there was no other gene pool that i came out of. It hits me like a sledgehammer when i remember that isn't the case.

Just last night i was lying in bed and off the back of a conversation said to my OH "wouldn't it be strange if my dad was dead and i never knew."
Was the first time in nearly a year that i had discussed him in any length other than explaining my lack of medical history on one side.

I've just had a phonecall from mum and when she says " we need to talk" i know to get a cup of tea, find a very soft sofa and steel myself for a shock.
Mum had a knock on her door yesterday by a man from a private investigation agency paid for by my dad. He wants to get in contact with myself and my siblings for some undisclosed reason, well it's only taken him 28 years since i last saw him so why the hell should he have a reason now!!
He knocked on my parents neighbours, he knocked on my parents house and thank god my father answered the door, it would've knocked mum off her feet.

Part of me thinks why the hell can't he just stay away, what right does he have to upset mum like this after all these years, she is in pieces and terrified that i'll get in contact with him. I love my mum dearly and no one hurts her without getting past me first.
the other part of me thinks this is my opportunity to get some deep seated answers to some age old questions, why did he leave me then? why has he left it so long before trying to contact us, how can you love your own daughter so little that you are prepared to walk away forever?
I am by nature an incredibly deeply insecure person. i said to oh on one occasion when he was berating me for being "a psycho" as he calls it "when my own father found me that worthless that he could walk out of my life why on earth would any guy stay"
I really don't know what to do. seek the answers, risk affecting my relationship further with my family and risk opening the biggest can of worms ever or let sleeping dogs lie?

i'm going to bed in a mo as i want to switch my brain off but when will it ever stop. why can't life just be straightforward as many other peoples ad free of stress and worry. god i feel like !!!!!!.