Disagreement over orthodontic treatment

Rockporkchop

Get it done - you won't regret it. I have hated my teeth for years (I'm a similar age to you) and finally got a full set of Invisalign braces done just before Christmas. The full length of the treatment is only 14 months for me and I can see a difference already.

Where are you based, by the way? I got my braces done at a Harley Street dentist and the whole package only cost me £1795, most of which I am paying monthly, interest free. Your quote seems extremely high.

rpc

Just do it.

And start a pension asap (a proper one, not a BTL).

Lovelyjoolz

whitewing wrote: »

I don't see it as asking for permission at all. My husband and I work and live together. We would discuss big spends because it affects each other. I certainly wouldn't get a Buy To Let place with him if we couldn't come to an agreement over a cosmetic/one off spend, even if that agreement is only an agreement to hold a differing opinion.

The difference here is that they are not married, they don't have a mortgage together, she lives (rather precariously) in his house and gives him money towards the bills and the grocery bill. Fanmail is in a very different situation to you.

dandelionclock30

Person_one wrote: »

Sorry but, who died and made him the boss of you?

This is not an equal partnership, your teeth are just the thing that's finally shining a light on that.

Teeth are not the real issue, of course you're going to get the treatment you want and can easily afford, that can't be in question. The issue is what happens to this relationship now that you know he prioritises being able to get his hands on your money over your happiness.

You could try going to Relate for some counselling, but personally I don't think people ever change deep down, and he sounds selfish, tight-fisted and controlling. I had an ex like that, its the main reason he's an ex.

This is right, what a selfish horrible cold boyfriend not to consider how you feel.
Get your teeth done and get rid of him, enjoy your money and your life while you can.Its never too late to get shut you know. Your money is yours, you don't have to ask him for permission when you want to spend it.
While sorting out your teeth, sort out a new flat and new life for yourself,I don't think you'll have any regrets.Move on from this miser.

Fanmail

Hollypop: these are like train tracks but not quite Ugly Bettys, though I would have no objtection to them, it's what I looked into first of all. Rockporkchop - all of the options I investigated were between £3 and £4k for upper and lower for my teeth - and that includes Invisalign, which was actually the most expensive apart from sublingual braces. Fbaby: Ideally the BTL within 2-3 years. I could go interest free; the dentist I visited does offer it, but it just seems mad if the money is sitting there.
Molly41: neither of us want children.
I'm inclined to think: what's £4k over a lifetime....?

suze200

Fanmail wrote: »

I could go interest free; the dentist I visited does offer it, but it just seems mad if the money is sitting there.
....?

Unless the dentist is going to offer you a cash discount equivalent to what you will loose in interest by using your savings (over the same period as it takes to pay off the interest free treatment) you would be mad NOT TO use the interest free option. Also you can carry on adding to savings minus the cost of the interest free loan payment, so how can BF object.

Brighton_belle

Just to clarify.. if you split up or he dies intestate, at 41, you will be homeless with no pension: is this correct?

This board is too full of people left financially stranded by partners they thought loved them and they trusted. Things can go wrong sadly. Illness can strike that changes personalities.

Please please consider seeing an IFA asap to assess your own finances to start paying into your own pension. It is a sound financial decison to spread your pension eggs into both monthy pension policy and property. BTL is not a panacia to all pension ills - there are potential pitfalls to them too.

Mrs_Imp

Maybe he simply loves you just the way you are and he can't understand you wanting to spend so much money trying to improve perfection?

I hate my tummy, which has never been the same since pregnancy. Mr Imp can't see anything wrong with it at all.

aridjis

Fanmail wrote: »

Am I being unreasonable?

It's not unreasonable to want to get your teeth straightened, but if you're in a long-term financial relationship with a partner an expense of £3000-4000 needs to be agreed by both of you, imo.

Fanmail

Hi Brighton belle - he has a will, and I am the sole beneficiary. The house has no mortgage.