Nice people thread part 8 - worth the wait

CKhalvashi

PasturesNew wrote: »

One thing for those co-habiting might be that if you have a joint account for your rent/bills, then you each keep your own money.... if the proverbial bus trundles along, then the one left behind can access the joint account, but that's no longer being topped up monthly with half the rent/bills. They could come unstuck very quickly that way.

We chuck everything in a pot, take money out if needed, and save what's left. We have kids, though, which probably makes the difference.

We're both 45% taxpayers, and although I could legally squeeze non-dom status to pay 10% tax on just about everything, I've come under a large amount of scrutiny for doing so, so it's just genuine non-EU income that goes down this route. OH is the same, and with the exception of ISAs, everything is in joint names (except the cars, obviously, and the companies, of which 3 are mine, 2 are hers, and the other is split 50/50)

Any investments come out of the savings pot, and with individual shares are split 50/50 down the middle (10 shares in my name, 10 shares in OH's name), and whilst we will 'borrow' from the investment pot, the rule is that it goes back in there.

CK

Spirit_2

PasturesNew wrote: »

Did you tell him you'd already gone alone and met one in the woods?

Yes. I had told him about you..and me meeting you on the interweb..when I got home that evening after we met.

silvercar

My money is in my company and taken out in tax efficient chunks for big purchases. OHs arrives regularly as PAYE. So when my current account runs dry, I transfer from his current account. The reason we don't have a joint current account is that he is lax about knowing what has gone out and when, whereas I am meticulous. He also likes the idea of us having our own money to spend on treats for each other.

Spirit_2

lostinrates wrote: »

Nice surprise this morning.


It's been a while since cotton bud got eaten by the fox and two of his bantam girls have been broody. I decided it was time ( with no idea of actual dates) to bush their eggs. To my surprise when I opened the doors to the back ( haven't done that for a few days) cotton eyed jojo had a chick, and when I lifted her up she had lots hiding under her wings. She has eleven in all!

That is lovely.....we will need pictures when they are out and about.

LydiaJ

Nikkster wrote: »

Oh yes, I appreciate that. I'd just like to know that the bills can definitely be paid etc. I lived with someone who had (probably still has) spending habits beyond their means. I'd also like to know that if I needed/ wanted to I could make a hasty exit.
Clearly I'm a romantic at heart

I can appreciate that. I spent a lot of years married to somebody who repeatedly "borrowed" money from my "savings for the long term" for trivial items, always with a promise to pay it back that was never kept, until he had got through all £30k that I brought to the marriage (largely inherited from grandparents and but also quite a bit saved up from all my childhood Christmases and birthdays in the high interest days of the 1970s). So I would take a lot of convincing to trust someone enough to get into a "fully joint accounts" deal with anybody. That would be merely part of the big amount of convincing that I would need to trust somebody enough to marry him.

neverdespairgirl

OH and I have pretty much the same attitude to money, I think. We spend a lot on housing, childcare and education, a fair amount on holidays, and not much on anything else. Not much in the way of big kit electronics, for example, or designer threads.

We don't have joint finances, as it's easier not to if you are self-employed, as we both are. In our old flat, the rent and utilities all went on DD out of my account, and OH would transfer money when I needed it.

The mortgage and council tax here go from his account, as do the water / gas / electricity, and I pay for childcare (which is more than mortgage and all bills put together).

We both have savings accounts which are instant access, and both have ISAs. We transfer money back and forth as required, internet instant banking is very useful in that way.

It's all "our" money, but it's easy as we both trust each other to be sensible and realistic about personal spending.

neverdespairgirl

Going on in the education psychologist's report (35 pages in all) his spelling is pretty rubbish. He was given 5 minutes to write anything of his choice about anything in the world. He wrote:

The kerod-drage the ohle alermor weich has verelm and peronern in the wold. Kk-ererkckck is the soant. Some maerls er 9 feet loge.

michaels

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

We've just received the draft of Isaac's report from the educational psychologist, with a request for some further information. She definitely thinks he is dyslexic , and his writing and reading scores are both really quite low, below his chronological age. She said, for example:

It seems that by the time Isaac has managed to write down his first idea he has forgotten the rest of what he wanted to say. Isaac’s spelling is, at best, phonetic or semi-phonetic, and, at worst, fairly bizarre and indecipherable


Which is true. She reckons his writing age at 6, and reading age at 7, and he's nearly 8. This compares with his oral expression, vocabulary and mental processing ages of 11, 10 and 9. So there's a real mis-match between different areas for him.

She sounded a bit suprised by his answer to one question:

When asked how ‘Space’ and ‘Time’ are alike in the last question on the Similarities subtest he made the following comment:


‘Space makes time in the big bang. There was no time before the big bang. No one knows exactly what time is but it stops things happening all at once.’

Your son is 3 years ahead in his oral expression and vocabulary, remind me again what is it you and NDB do for a living....

I'm not sure dyslexic warrants a , hopefully the world has moved on from the days where it was misunderstood and resulted in bright pupils being held back (Sue don't comment). It would be a boring world if everyone confirmed to the 'norm' in everything. Apparently I was a slow reader until they eventually found some books I found interesting and then it just clicked and I became a real nose in a book at all times child and DD2 seems similar, DD1 has always been well ahead in reading but has no interest in books, DD2 struggled but seems to have made a real breakthrough in the last 6 months and now is much more keen to read.

vivatifosi

Just a quick thanks to Nikks for doing the scores on the doors last night. I lost track when DH came home. Thanks!

Spirit_2

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

Going on in the education psychologist's report (35 pages in all) his spelling is pretty rubbish. He was given 5 minutes to write anything of his choice about anything in the world. He wrote:

The kerod-drage the ohle alermor weich has verelm and peronern in the wold. Kk-ererkckck is the soant. Some maerls er 9 feet loge.

DD's ex bf was very dyslexic and had been a great worry to his parents as a young boy. He was however very clever at maths,sciences, computing, mechanical stuff.

He scraped 'c's in English and humanities at GCSE but no surprises A* in maths etc - he has a Msc from Oxford and is working as an actuary in the city. He cannot read fiction but listens to books and built himself a car from scratch.

My DD is slightly dyspraxic...we decided not to worry about it or overtly address it..she could read fluently from 4 and English and languages were her strengths...maths and science were a bit of a trial but we gave her support so that she did well enough...

I think I am trying to say...he will be more than fine even if he is not an A student in everything.