Nice people thread part 8 - worth the wait

tomterm8

You probably did the right thing. To be honest, after my mum's experience with her stroke I put neuroscience at about the leech and bloodletting stage for how much they know.

Spirit_2

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

?

I have a weakness for pearls - not the dead boring round smooth white sort, QUOTE]

I am not a jewellry wearing type. My wedding ring is worn on my little finger as it is too small for my ring finger - I weighed less than 7 stone when I got married....and a good deal more now.

Other than that I have a long string of pearls which are smooth anc creamy...and I love them. A gold locket with a silhouette inside of my DD as a baby. Two gold bangles and an eternity ring. No earings.

My lovely friend has a chest of drawers full of silver costume jewellry which he husband is sorting through. It is odd as I remember her in a few statement pieces and had no idea she had amassed so much.

We bought our daughter a pandora bracelet as a birthday present this year and I am surprised at how much pleasure she has had from it.

Spirit_2

lemonjelly wrote: »

LIR, do it. What have you got to lose?

Agree totally. Ensure you are able enough for the things you want to do..and do not waste your energy on being parked too far away from where the action is.

SingleSue

LydiaJ wrote: »

Poor little DS. Hope he gets over it soon and nobody else catches it.

(Am envious of job where you can take time off to look after your kids when they are ill.)



Sue, this is totally unacceptable. I really feel you need backup here. Is there anyone at the local authority you can complain to, who can beat the school with a big stick for you? Or some kind of ASD charity who could provide you with a free advocate-type person?

There's been a long pattern of you complaining to the school and them ignoring you, and of the school quite simply failing to fulfil its obligations to Youngest. There is no indication that the school are going to get any more cooperative if you keep complaining by yourself in the way that you have been doing, and the time has come (or is in fact overdue) for the pressure on the school to be stepped up considerably.

Even if you can't get anyone with clout to back you up, can you get hold of the text of DS's statement, plus the equalities or SEN policies of the school, to demonstrate exactly where they are failing to do what they are contracted to do? In my own case, I got nowhere complaining to the inactive coroner about the lack of progress towards an inquest date until I quoted the coroner's charter to the coroner's office, threatening to make an official complaint unless the stuff mentioned in the charter was done. Remarkably soon, things started to progress.

To be honest, I don't know. I have stayed away on purpose from groups related to autism mainly because they would do the "my child is more autistic than your child" (yes really!) but also because their diagnosis came once they were at school (the thought process of these parents is that if you get the diagnosis later, then your child isn't properly autistic). I am also seen as being cruel because I don't pander to their autism - the 'my child can't do that because they are autistic' school of thought. I am rather of the 'my child may find it difficult but with some prep, planning and coping mechanisms, should be able to do that despite their autism' school of thought.

The biggest problem we have is that the school has become an academy and the way they run things is very money and schedule orientated rather than child centered. Youngest was not the only autistic child they did this to, they also did it to another child who was at the special needs playgroup with youngest....his mum is having similar problems.

His last statement review was a bit of a whitewash to be honest, they reduced his TA hours under the excuse it would be more effectively targeted to where he really needed it...sounded sensible at the time but now I know I was misled. I don't have the updated statement as yet, not sure if the school have even sent it to the LEA.

At least with the old SENCO back (she was on maternity leave), I have got further in the last week as she immediately arranged for the outreach support worker to see youngest, so a step further than I have previously got....he was completely unaware of the problems, so the stand in SENCO had obviously not contacted him after my previous discussions.

The returned SENCO is also very unhappy with what has been happening, as is the TA who spent a lot of time with youngest when we were working on getting him into the front doors of the school in years 7 and 8. Nothing had been passed onto the old TA whilst the original SENCO was on maternity, so my complaints were obviously seen as the moanings of an over anxious, pandering mother with no merit attached to them.

Spirit_2

A rather mixed day in the Spirit household. Drove most of the way to work then realised I had left my bank cards in the handbag I used yesterday..needed them as I was going out after work.. so had to turn back, collect cards and return to work. A 90 mile trip instead of the usual 30 mile commute:mad:

Got to work and could not park. Parked in a 'forbidden place' pleaded with the parking people and gave tehm my keys so I could get to a meeting with the CEO and FD in the nick of time. Got the go ahead for a couple of projects and to recruit project managers :)so despite rushing in it went well and meeting overran. Rushed out retrieved keys and reparked. Then too late to start the appraisal of one of the team...felt like I had let them down. Two managers had responsibility for deciding on a short term appointment..3 applicants...close run thing...one of the unsucessful people rather shocked them by being pretty vile witha massive sense of entitlement They have to sort out the conduct/behavioural feedback they need to give.

Went out for dinner to mark the birthday of one of the Senior team..and as boss I picked up the drinks bill...but it was <£100 so pretty cheap. Which was just as well as when I got home Mr S had been at the dentist today ..for impressions, for a cours eof work I mentioned before that would cost £8000. Well it will happen in phases...phase 1 by July £5200 then 6 months later second phase ...up to £10,000:eek::eek::eek:

I have to take time off with him for future appts (he has 3 booked already) as he will be given valium. After the shock of the costs I want bl**dy vallium. £15000 for Dentistry. I have only said supportive things but I am thinking very grumpy thoughts.

LydiaJ

SingleSue wrote: »

At least with the old SENCO back (she was on maternity leave), I have got further in the last week...

That sounds like the first bit of good news we've had about Youngest's school in a long time. This SENCO sounds like just the sort of person you need. Keep talking to her (grandmother ... eggs ... suck ... sorry). Perhaps ask her if there's anything you can do to help her in what she's doing to fight for Youngest. You never know, she just might say "Well, Mr Bloggs at the LEA is the person who can make a difference here, but he never listens to SENCOs but only if a parent complains" or something like that.

Positive thoughts and prayers coming in your direction, Sue.

Spirit_2

SingleSue wrote: »

so my complaints were obviously seen as the moanings of an over anxious, pandering mother with no merit attached to them.

That is pretty arrogant on their part if this is true. The trouble is this may be a situation where it is not worth holding them to account but putting that same energy into re-establishing a relationship with the returning senco and those who should help your son now.

michaels

Spirit wrote: »

I have to take time off with him for future appts (he has 3 booked already) as he will be given valium. After the shock of the costs I want bl**dy vallium. £15000 for Dentistry. I have only said supportive things but I am thinking very grumpy thoughts.

Get them all pulled and a set of falsies on the NHS...or my dad got a full set of implants in south Africa for I suspect a lot less than that.

A 30 mile each way drive commute doesn't sound great but perhaps not close to London it is not so bad?

WE are supposed to be targeting Health service opportunities in case the departments we work for suddenly find themselves with no money for consultants - does your organisation have a tendering portal?

vivatifosi

Spirit, PM me if you are interested, but I have a very good dentist who you can call up and check whether your DH's quote is fair. He specialises in implants and tricky work. I have a lot on over the next couple of days so may not be around to pick up PMs, so may not be able to answer straight away, but if you're interested I'll be happy to pass on details. He's in Herts, so probably too far, however he did say that there are so many dentists in London and M25 there is more price competition up here.

vivatifosi

A quick post for lir and other people who like books.

There's a book building up a bit of a head of steam at the moment but that is currently below the mainstream radar. We're starting to see interest in it and I think it will really take off as it is being made into a film. Reviews from the people I know who have read it say it is well written and an interesting premise as well as a truly excellent book:

Light between the oceans, ML Steadman:
http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/13158800-the-light-between-oceans
http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Light-Between-Oceans-Stedman/dp/0552778478/ref=tmm_pap_title_0?ie=UTF8&qid=1366785210&sr=8-1