Nice people thread part 8 - worth the wait

GDB2222

SingleSue wrote: »

I've spent the morning in a meeting with the school (3rd in less than a week). We are almost at crisis point with youngest son and we are trying to stop it getting to the crisis point...not sure if that is possible but we can but try.

You ought to remind the school that their job is to avoid making a catastrophe out of a crisis.

lemonjelly

Nikkster wrote: »

Urgh. After seeing the thread about student loans, I thought I would look up what the balance of mine is. Apparently doing a 4 year undergrad, followed by a number of years of postgraduate study means it looks pretty similar to what it did when I left Uni for the first time. It is very tempting to just pay off a chunk, but that would be silly when it can (just about) be earning more as savings.Mind you, I'm glad I don't have one of the newer-style loans.

As I posted on that thread, there is a great deal of misunderstanding & misinformation out there about student loans.
Don't think about it as a loan or a debt. It works as a graduate tax!

lemonjelly wrote: »

There is an astonishing lack of understanding of the current student loan systems out there...

a student will apply for a loan to cover tuition fees (circa £9k). They will also qualify for a loan & grant of £5-9k per annum for living costs.

Loan repayments are calculated at 9% of any income above £21k per annum.

So, if we assume that a student has "borrowed" £50k in total over a 3 year course (fee loans, & also maintenance loans). They graduate, & have a fixed 30 year repayment timescale.

Let us assume they earn around the national average wage each year - currently just over £25k.

Repayments therefore work out at approx £360 a year (9% of £4000). Multiply that by the 30 years a person pays = repaying £10,800. The other £40k (plus any "interest") is wiped off the record!

lostinrates

Grrrr.....

The skirt I wanted is out of stock (online too now). Saw a nice pair of trousers but was too tired by then to consider got home...they are now out of stock online. Grrrrrrrrrr. Now furious with myself for not buying them in store and feel a pressing need to find the absolutely perfect simple black maxi skirt for summer.



At least I got the vests I needed and the lipstick I didn't need and a couple of things that dh will like for his birthday.

lemonjelly

Generali wrote: »

No gilded path for me into The City unfortunately. I got a job paying £5.50 an hour inputting money market trades into a computer. Then lied about my experience to get my next job. They found me out and sacked me but by then I could do the job!

Since then it's been a big fight to stay in the game. Now I don't know what to do really. I don't have much in the way of savings (gone due to GFC and extended unemployment) and I'm not on megabucks so the plan has gone quite badly wrong. Oh well, we'll get there.

I definitely agree with this thread widening my social range.

@lydiaJ. Thank you for the cyberhug.

Aha!;)
And what did this experience teach you about trust & how to build/rebuild it?!;);););););););););););)

lostinrates

I am seriously thinking now about enquiring about a blue badge having resisted all this time. Ironically, this comes as I feel better for pain than I have done for ages and ages and ages.

I was shocked by how exhausted I got shopping though and at one point had a bit of a panic I was too exhausted to make it back to the car. I realise that part of the reason I am not going out is because I can handle either the going or the out, but both together are too much.

lemonjelly

LIR, do it. What have you got to lose?

lemonjelly

Sue, I agre with GBD222.

The scholl had plenty of warnings and information to provide appropriate support to your son.

They have failed in their responsibilities.

Current actions and failure to take responsibility is making it worse, and therefore more difficult for son.

There are Equalities issues here.

PasturesNew

Some test that they have developed that tells your age - it thinks I am 30.

http://kgajos.eecs.harvard.edu/ag/

tomterm8

lemonjelly wrote: »

Aha!;)
And what did this experience teach you about trust & how to build/rebuild it?!;);););););););););););)

I don't know, don't get caught?

If he hadn't lied he wouldn't have got the job anyway.

LydiaJ

michaels wrote: »

Home with DS this AM who was up vomiting most of the night and DW has a course this morning - quite lucky really as otherwise I would be sleeping at my desk

Poor little DS. Hope he gets over it soon and nobody else catches it.

(Am envious of job where you can take time off to look after your kids when they are ill.)

SingleSue wrote: »

I've spent the morning in a meeting with the school (3rd in less than a week). We are almost at crisis point with youngest son and we are trying to stop it getting to the crisis point...not sure if that is possible but we can but try.

This all relates back to the idea he could start cross siting without any kind of planning or prep, unfortunately, what I warned about in September has now come to fruition...he cannot cope.

They actually thought he was ok because he hadn't said anything to indicate otherwise, one of these days they will actually listen (or read his past educational notes) and get it into their heads that youngest does not ask for help, does not do anything that will draw attention to himself and will not speak to TAs he does not know.

Goodness only knows how they thought a child who took two years prepping and planning to go to high school, only became sort of settled 3 years after arriving at high school, would be able to make a sudden and complete change to his routine with no adverse impact at all...it takes him the best part of a school year to accept a different teacher, let alone several different teachers and a completely different school!

I am so so angry! We finally got him moving forward educationally (at school, he has always shown it at home) and then they go and do that with the end result that he is now falling backwards educationally, is withdrawing socially and emotionally and struggling at school. Youngest is amazingly bright, gifted intellectually but is now showing as just below average..I have been warning about it for ages but because of his difficulty in settling, thought we would have to settle for average or just above but you don't go from being above average GCSE level in maths at age 10 to being below average at GCSE at age 15.

Grrrrrrrrrrr!!

(Extra exclamation as I am annoyed)

Sue, this is totally unacceptable. I really feel you need backup here. Is there anyone at the local authority you can complain to, who can beat the school with a big stick for you? Or some kind of ASD charity who could provide you with a free advocate-type person?

There's been a long pattern of you complaining to the school and them ignoring you, and of the school quite simply failing to fulfil its obligations to Youngest. There is no indication that the school are going to get any more cooperative if you keep complaining by yourself in the way that you have been doing, and the time has come (or is in fact overdue) for the pressure on the school to be stepped up considerably.

Even if you can't get anyone with clout to back you up, can you get hold of the text of DS's statement, plus the equalities or SEN policies of the school, to demonstrate exactly where they are failing to do what they are contracted to do? In my own case, I got nowhere complaining to the inactive coroner about the lack of progress towards an inquest date until I quoted the coroner's charter to the coroner's office, threatening to make an official complaint unless the stuff mentioned in the charter was done. Remarkably soon, things started to progress.

lemonjelly wrote: »

LIR, do it. What have you got to lose?

Yes. Do it. Immediately.