Hoarding - Springing Ahead

Saver-upper

Busy,busy,busy:that's me today :j.
With THAT tabletop sale afew weekends ago leading to my whole house looking like a bomb has gone off,leading to me resolving to start decluttering the loft,leading to me neglecting the rest of the house,it has been afew weeks since my house has had a proper clean and tidy.Well,today was the day:started in the kitchen (absolutely loathe clutter on my kitchen benches.Anymore than a kettle,fruit-bowl and spice rack drives me mad.)Also washed kitchen floor.
Then worked way through lounge room(dusted,vacuumed,tidied,tidied up bundles of stuff from loft that I am slowly sorting through for donation,tidied up papers to be sorted .
Did hallway (not much work there,only small),then wandered upstairs,tidied our bedroom-mostly washing to be put away:another thing that drives me barmy-clean clothes lying around the house :mad:.
When the kids came home they tidied their rooms (2 roomsbetween the 4 of them ),then I was able to vacuum those.
Due to space (2 youngest children sharing a box room),their chest of drawers for clothing is in our bedroom.I decluttered and dusted the tops of these (I dust regularly,not so good with decluttering.Got rid of afew niknaks,and [STRIKE]hid[/STRIKE] put toiletries in a box
Over the weekend I will clean the bathroom:have a couple of long days at work for the rest of the week.
Might sort through abit of paperwork before going to bed;maybe the most recent papers to be added to my kitchen carp corner.Am trying to work on decluttering paper for at least 30 minutes a day.Am sure I will still never get to the bottom of my "in tray" :rotfl:.

mcculloch29

Lobbyludd: actually that was a big moan - but it's done now - does anyone else find well-meaning, uber-organised folks doing things to "help" that actually hinder?

Yes. My cleaner was full of expletive bright ideas. One of which was collecting all my walking sticks together (strategically positioned round the house where an extra stick comes in handy) and putting them all in one place. Including the stick I was actually using, making walking extraordinarily difficult and painful.

Putting my bathroom mats out to air, leaving me to bring them in but not bothering to tell me, so they got soaked in a sudden rain shower and needed washing...

Using brand new expensive specialist bathroom cleaning sponges for the toilet so they had to be binned, and using the pricey ceramic hob sponge for the sink so it was useless.

My son does it too - he moved all the salt into the cupboard furthest from the cooker so I didn't have it handy to season pasta, etc, same with spices . Gah.

softpad

lobbyludd wrote: »

hello new people !!
well done every-one

I got rid of a lot of minor but irritating stuff over the weekend - can't remember all of it - but things like the mirror I broke trying to cut it to size (no, self, I can't find a use for a smaller mirror OR glue it back together and "hide" the seam), almost finished toothpaste tubes for the children after they discontinued the only formula they would use (they have transitioned to the new one now so no need to keep).

house looked lovely, then I had 11 preteens for a party and have been too tired since to keep on top of it. but it should be easier to get it looking nice together because I was quite ruthless with numerous things I was getting around to making decisions on.

small moan. Some lovely family came to help with the party, and did loads, and I feel really churlish saying this but I am so glad they are not helping anymore, as much of their helping generated work for me (e.g. they decided to sort out something in the garden whilst I was busy, and without asking if/how I wanted it done, and despite being keen gardeners themselves in the process have crushed some of my plants, trod in cat poo and then cleaned it in a way that I found unhygienic and I'm really not a great hygiene fiend - but I know they would have done it in a different way in their own house) and I now have to undo and redo what they did.

I can't say this to anyone else, so I'm saying it here - just because I am not minimalist and you don't understand my system, doesn't mean you can blunder about doing anything that you decide should be done. I had to chuck them out of the kitchen at one point - I had served breakfast, was making treats for the party which was within hours of starting and cooking a roast dinner. They offered to help so I gave them a task which needed doing, which they promptly ignored and decided to empty the dishwasher. A task which could definitely wait, cutting me off from the cooker as they wandered around and taking up all work surfaces because they didn't know where anything went because I don't store things where they would.

I've only just got the kitchen back to a situation where I know where the cutlery is after another visiting family member helpfully re-organised it to their system (leaving all the sharp knives well within reach of dd, the plastic cookware melting next to the side of the cooker that gets really hot and the stainless steel implements beyond my reach).

their hearts are in the right place, they would be devastated if they thought they weren't being helpful and I love seeing them, but gosh.

actually that was a big moan - but it's done now - does anyone else find well-meaning, uber-organised folks doing things to "help" that actually hinder?

I know PRECISELY what you mean and I would hate it! I am obviously less nice that you as I just could not bring myself to let anyone do those things! :rotfl:

GreyQueen

Oh lobbyludd and muculloch, I do know exactly what you mean.

How we organise our homes is very personal and there are a lot of factors which make perfect sense to us as the occupants but may not even be noticed by our would-be helpers. I go spare if things to be washed up are put on the draining board; I operate a strict policy of clean-side/ dirty side on that sink. And don't even get me started on the complicated hieracrchy of cloths and sponges.......

I have things in my kitchen organised in ways which make sense to me, inc having things within reach. If it's on the toppermost shelf of the wall units, it's there because it doesn't need to be accessed frequently. If it's beside the cooker, like the teabag tin, it's there because I'm in and out of it lots of times per day.

Today I will be working again and probably not do too much decluttering, just maintenance stuff. I'm enjoying keeping on top of things and even have one piece of cabinet furniture with absolutely NOTHING on top of it. Well, apart from the library book I shall be taking out with me to return after work. Apart from that, there are a lots of clear areas and apart from taking down the clothes airer, I didn't need to rush around to do stuff to make it company-ready.

Keep on keeping on, my lovelies.

Catriona_P

lobbyludd wrote: »

actually that was a big moan - but it's done now - does anyone else find well-meaning, uber-organised folks doing things to "help" that actually hinder?

I totally understand what you mean. Unfortunately it's not been my experience in this area, at least not with family. I find that when my family visit (and on a day-to-day basis with my husband) that their reasoning is that since I'm 'messy', that gives them the green light to treat my house however they choose - including being unhygienic or just downright messy. If I pull them up on things they laugh and say ironically 'YOU'RE telling us to be tidy?' or words to that effect. :mad:

My husband used to be the 'neat freak' in our relationship but down the years he's got more and more lazy about things to the extent that he's much worse than I am. We've gone in opposite directions about mess. It's very frustrating when I'm trying so hard to make things right. If I pull him up on anything his response is 'well your things aren't tidy either'. :mad:

Either way when help is just a hindrance it's bound to annoy you.

short_bird

Today, I think I'll take everything off the bookshelf that isn't a book or magazine. Or a bookend.

And then corral the books and mags that are everywhere else :rotfl:

whitewing

Yes GQ, I am the same as you regarding dirty washing up being on the correct side of the sink. The dishwasher was supposed to eliminate any dirty washing up being out but it has seriously reduced the problem not eliminated it. I am happy though - we all hate washing up.


I realised this morning that I still view everything as 'projects'. Even though I like the idea of mindfulness, I was unwittingly viewing that as a 'project'. Project Be-in-the-moment, which is quite funny to me now. I met a lovely lady a few days ago - well, I didn't met her, she was doing a presentation. I was very inspired by her. She was in her late sixties and was petite and immaculate and intelligent and her kindness radiated through. And I was thinking that I'd like to be like her. And she has been on my mind occasionally like a butterfly bringing sunshine. And I realised that everything she does, she has a purpose to do it nicely. She is efficient with her time because she knows from experience what she needs to do. She takes the time to look immaculate. She eats well. She is active (rather than forcing herself to be exercising). Whereas I have Project Get-DD-Ready-To-Go-Out-Of-The-House, Project-Get-The-Dry-Clothes-Put-Away.


So now, I am going to allow myself to doing my morning exercise and daily routine as part of a purposeful day. If I'm at a work meeting, I wouldn't think more or less of someone because they vacuumed their living room before they left home. But I would notice if they were happy in themselves.


Anyway, dehoarding-wise, a few bags of sweets that were given to DH by family (who we can't get to give alternatives) have been brought to work for customers and staff.

Patchwork_Quilt

Since I decided not to visit charity shops for Lent, there has been much less movement of stuff in and out of the house.

I do feel a little constrained, though. We need a new duvet cover. The trouble is, I'll wander into 0xfam to look for one and before I know it, I'll be rifling through the clothes rails and picking over the household goods.

And on the subject of relatives, I don't know if it's worse to have the 'helpful' kind or the kind that simply sit there without offering to do anything. I do get kind of twitchy, though, when FIL wanders down the garden uninvited to inspect the veg patch. I think it's my innate insecurity - 'I must be doing something wrong, he'll laugh at my system' etc. Of course, he's always very encouraging, but I still feel it.

VJsmum

whitewing wrote: »

If I'm at a work meeting, I wouldn't think more or less of someone because they vacuumed their living room before they left home. But I would notice if they were happy in themselves.

I like this, what a great philosophy to have.

No dehoarding progress. But it will happen soon. 40 things for lent may all have to be n one go

GreyQueen

Morning all.

Well, I was watching one of the old Britain's Biggest Hoarder programmes on YoooTuuubbbe last night and simulaneously felt the urge to get into the gift stash box. This is about the size of a large shoebox and is where I store little gifts, acquired when I see something suitable, for those ladies I exchange modest gifts with at our respective birthdays and Crimble.

One of those birthdays is in a fortnight, another a few weeks after that, so I wanted to see if I had something suitable for both (yes) and I have wrapped them from the wrapping paper stash which you may recall I streamlined to be contained in a single plastic pop-closed A4 folder.

I also married up some of the remaining stuff with the list of names in the diary so that I know who I need to have something for, and what there is in the box to match with them. Plus I found one thing I decided I wanted to use myself and a couple of things I decided to go to the c.s. as they wouldn't really be suitable for my intended recipients.

You can save time and money shopping ahead for gifts but you do need to have a system in place to make sure that it doesn't get out of control.

Can I ask what others think of the visuals of seriously hoarded homes? I know we have remarked that there are nearly always empty boxes floating around on the hoard, but about the general disorder?

I'm intriuged by the mentality which at the same time values Stuff so highly that the mere thought of parting with it is cause of huge distress, whilst ramming it together higgledy-piggeldy in such a way that it's bound to be getting damaged. The upside/ sideways down furniture-garnishing-a-landfill look. IYKWIM.

Surely if you valued it, you wouldn't want to keep it in such a way that destroyed it?