Hoarding - Springing Ahead

softpad

Hi

I would like to raise what nobody has talked about (I think). Hoarding and messiness often goes hand in hand with having the dreaded mice! I am fighting a war with them at the moment with traps and poison and have got rid of quite a few. It's really horrible to be woken up in the night with something chewing under the floorboards. I filled all the gaps outside so hopefully nothing new can get in, I just have to get rid of what I have got and am spending a fortune on poison. It does not help that I have an old house and have not got fitted carpets in lots of rooms due to lack of funds. We are getting things done gradually such as the windows replaced which were falling out, decorating is coming next but the lack of doors and gaps at the edge of skirtings make it so easy for mice to get around. It is horrible and frustrating and it's not as if I have food etc, lying around but they are still so hard to get rid of and I think the piles of stuff don't help this as its harder to really deep clean. I hope I'm not the only one.

I went mad at hubby as he actually threw some crumbs on the carpet in the lounge!!!! He said well its messy anyway and I had a big blow up as I am the only one that hoovers and cleans. I was so, so angry. The least he can do is try not to make more mess!! I had only vacuumed the day before and I do keep the lounge nice with no piles. I was so angry.

We went into three CS and I was so proud of myself for not buying a single thing. There were some things I was tempted with but I asked myself if I really needed them and the answer was no so I didn't get them. My hubby even urged me to get a couple of things but I said no. I really couldn't wait to post about it, its a bit like Hoarders Anonymous on here don't you think? It helps to have the support of the group, definitely.

I am gradually getting the wilderness of brambles sorted in the garden, too but its a really long job and I am going to make hubby dig it over when I have cleared the top. I don't see why I should do everything, he is so bloody lazy.

Got a huge heap of things ready for a car boot in a couple of weeks which I am determined NOT to come home with. I got rid of two plastic storage boxes because all I do is just fill them with carp, they are going to the car boot to be sold though instead of thrown away, might as well have some money.

I also have far too many coats and shoes and I think they need to be culled too. For some reason hubby buys me a new coat every year, they are all nice but its got to the point where I have to rotate them as how many coats can one person wear? I have told him not to buy me any more.

I also am making a huge effort to lose weight and get more healthy as I feel so fat. I weigh far more than I ever have done in my entire life and its partly because hubby is such a lazy couch potato. Before we got together I used to go for long walks in the woods and rambling etc, but he never wants to go out so now I don't. I find myself looking out of the window feeling a bit trapped and have decided enough is enough and I am going to go on my own this year. I can't waste my life and youth waiting for a lazy person to motivate themselves, I have to make my own happiness and live my life how I want to. Life is too short.

I really think that overweight, messy, feeling tired and overwhelmed and eating badly all stem from a similar state of mind and feelings of depression and having given up. They do for me, anyway. I am determined to change all this, this year and am working steadily towards it. I have had a long few years when I was just so worried about money and paying bills that it was all I could focus on and everything else just got lost in the process. I now need to sort that out. I have worked so, so hard.

Two more bin liners of rubbish out yesterday and there will be more today.

So sorry for such a long rambling post but I hope somebody finds it helpful as others' posts help me.

GreyQueen

((((((((softpad)))))))))) I'm sorry you're having such a time of it at the moment. I still recall my shock at going into the tiny kitchen at a rented flat which I shared with several others, switching on the light and have two mice scoot under the cupboards at speed. And that was in the 1980s.

I don't consider myself a nervous nellie but it left me wanting to jump on a chair and scream like a cliche movie girlie from an old sitcom. They were coming up from the shop below our flat, apparently.

It does make you feel icky to share quarters with vermin and I speak as someone who books pest control treatments for a local authority. People with rats in their kitchens are particularly and understandably stressed.

The trouble with having A Lot of Stuff is that it leaves a lot of places for critters to make themselves at home. And not just rodents, there are insects chewing on things like carpets, woodworm, and the insidious damp problems which can lead to mould growing in corners and behind things where the walls haven't seen the light of day for a long time.

It might not be a bad idea for anyone going into a long-undisturbed part of their own or another's home to wear a dust mask to keep some of this muck out of your airways...........

ginnyknit

Softpad, sounds like life is determined to put obstacles in front of you but you are equally determined to hop over them hunny. If hubby is lazy then you must get yourself out and about if only for half an hours stroll, it will make you feel much better. Time apart for a little while is worth its weight in gold...hmmm...new t shirt idea for me I think! 2 binbags full yesterday and more today :T:T:T thats fab.

VJsmum

I know not as bad as rats and mice but we had the dreaded carpet moth last year. Was moving some old tat in the spare room, to give it a rare Hoover and there were what looked like grains of rice on the floor.

A quick google told me it was carpet moth. The result was that we had to bin all the old tat ( spare quilts and sleeping bags, some old handbags, etc etc) and even bust up a wardrobe. The carpet had to go also as it was bare in patches.

I haven't missed the stuff we were storing at all, and if I hadn't been storing it, we would have saved ourselves around £500. An expensive lesson learned.

lobbyludd

WW - all my things are projects, but I'm currently a programme co-ordinator, it's how I have been trained to think at work, previously a researcher, so all projects and plans there too. blinking useless at being in the moment

mice - hmm, a friend was staying, split a glass of juice on the bathroom mat, brought it downstairs, stated: it's good job I love you and turned over the mat to reveal a dehydrated mouse flattened and stuck to the underside - we had a problem with them under the bathroom apparently, exH drunkenly passing out in the bath with the taps running and flooding the bathroom, kitchen underneath and gap between sorted it out at a cost of mere thousands to repair the damage he'd done. but the fact it had been there long enough to dessicate and we'd not noticed any smell was very disturbing.

GQ I have a drawer of gifts bought throughout the year when genuinely an offer, most are loosely for someone, but it doesn't always work out as neatly as yours (some people are SO easy to buy for - others terribly hard).

re "stuff" and not seeing the over-all landfill quality, I don't know? I do know I am very good at seeing the tiny detail of beauty/potential in a sea of devastation, which serves me well in some situations where I am feeling very down and can look and find a little flower, the curve of a branch and feel joy. But visually I am a) not a "big picture" person, I home in on details and b) I am happy with work-in-progress - I am perfectly content with the ongoing project that is the hall renovation, because I can see how it will look when it's done, I don't see how it is now. my mother is driven to distraction by boxes not unpacked within 24hrs of a move or workman taking 2 days to do a project. My hall, through lack of time and funds, has taken 2 years to strip down. But I'm not stressed about it.

maybe it's the potential of things rather than the reality of the total space?

mcculloch29

I wonder if hoarders just get so swamped that any decisions on what to keep or what to throw become impossible? Some may be addicted to the buzz of shopping but have no interest in the item once it arrives, or make decisions from time to time about new hobbies that never get underway.
They buy the equipment which then lies there unused.
Why so many are obsessed with old newspapers is a bit of a puzzle. That seems to come up quite regularly. Is it because newspapers contain information and there may be something which will be useful to them?
I have bought a few cookbooks lately, I think it's time to look at the shelves and see what can be CS'd or if anything published recently is pristine enough for the library.

lobbyludd

In a fit of what can only be called over-optimistic madness I have just registered for BG to come and inspect whether they can insulate my loft for free. The loft is the last bastion of true hoarding. I am quite excited by the prospect of a deadline to make me be ruthless about the "potentially useful stuff" up there. I have 4 days next week to start to crack on with clearing it. Even if I don't qualify I have already earmarked mentally things to go and will start tomorrow in bagging and recycling.

probably a bonkers move that I will regret shortly, but any progress will be progress

GreyQueen

:T:T lobbyludd, sometimes a person has to do something which might seem a bit extreme to achieve a desired end. A deadline can be marvellously motivating if you look on it that way. More power to your elbow.

Today I have inventoried the toiletries supply and binned some OOD ointments and creams. Have also declined the offer of another bottle of hair conditioner from Mum's bathroom as I have my own bottle on the go, and when that's done, I have the last bottle of I-bought-it-but-meant-to-buy-the-shampoo-in-the-same-range from her. Have advised her that I am probably good for hair conditioner for 2-3 years.

I also decluttered some hair today by having my mop trimmed so you can call me Sean. Plus I have rounded up the fiddly little bottles of product I take on holiday and will use those up. Bliddy things are breeding, I swear it.

VJsMum, ick to having the 'woolly bears' in your carpet and other belongings. It must have been incredibly frustrating to have to bin good stuff due to pest infestation. And if that's what can befall a spare room in a respectable house, imagine what lurks within the severely-hoarded homes. Anyone follow Hoarding Woes and You in the early days when the American blogger kept finding mummified or skeletonised possums in and around his auntie's hoarded house?

*shudder* at least a dead possum is something not likely to be encountered in a British hoard. For which we may give hourly thanks.

http://hoardingwoes.wordpress.com/2012/03/03/hoarding-woes-the-dead-in-the-shed/

whitewing

Table cleared. Mother's Day cards out for signing while we are all here,then they will be delivered tomorrow.

Other presents have gone.

Small pile of paperwork filed away.

Dry towels away and will unpack the dishwasher when it is finished. The battle against newly arriving stuff is much easier when the house is tidy. Apart from having space to put it in, it seems easier to make decisions about it with an uncluttered mind.

GreyQueen

whitewing wrote: »

. The battle against newly arriving stuff is much easier when the house is tidy. Apart from having space to put it in, it seems easier to make decisions about it with an uncluttered mind.

YES! This is the heart of it.

If the place looks like a landfill and you drop a bit more on the floor or the ktichen counter, it sort of 'disappears', doesn't it? And it isn't a simple pick-up job, it's a major undertaking and we're all busy and tired and there's a thousand valid reasons not to tackle it...........

Last night I CBA to do the dishes but managed to nix them when the kettle was boiling for my cuppa this morning. Which indicates that it wasn't much of a pile of stuff, eh? But it seemed daunting then, lol.

Today I work (work over 5 days but not full-time due to several chronic illnesses) and will do some stuff when I get home. I have effectively lost control of the contents of my huge (tabletop) freezer and no longer know more than approximately what's in there. It's overdue for a defrost too, so I propose to combine doing that with running inventory and the eating it down. It's rammed atm and I'll be stuck if I see some brilliant YS bargains as there will be nowhere to put therm.

Y'know, things were more straightforward, although more limited, back in our great-grans' and grans' time. You had a larder. Stuff sat on shelves. You could see what you had at a glance.

Although my Nan (91 this summer) is no fan of doing things the hard way and loves her freezer and microwave..........

I have also got to the last of the carrier bags which I lined my bin with. I have one bin, which is actually one of those black florists' buckets and it serves kitchen and living room. Non-recyclables amount to about one carrier bag-full, not bursting, per week, so it takes me a while to get thru the stash which Mum dumped on me. Plus some are leaving with the charity shop donations.

Chiselling away at it, one item at a time. Keep up the good work, folks. GQ xx