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Oh !!!!!! what have i done!!!!!!

Hi to every one on here you have all been a great insperation to me over the last couple of weeks. well where do i start. Im 35 married with 2 kids ds 13 and dd 12 i work full time and have got myself into debt again. OH knows nothing and he carnt find out or it would be the end.:eek:

Monthly Incoming:
My salary - £1120
Oh half of bills - £720
Benefits - £42

Total - £1882

Monthly Outgoings:

Secure Homes - £1280 this includes: payment care, death plan, savings, mortgage death plan,council tax, sky, phone, gas, house ins, pet insurance, mortgage plus £265 overpayment, car tax for 2 cars, water bill,and tv licence)
t.v ins for dd -£18.90 (3mths left)
car ins -£48.95
t.v ins ds -£20-98 (3mths left)
kids mags - £11.98 (cancelling)
mobile phone -£35 (16mts left)
moblie dd - £35 (16mts left)
mobile ds - £55 (7mts left)
savings - £80 (10 me, ds 5 and dd 5)per week
school dinner -£80
petrol - £80
milk man -£6
electric -£60
Total: £1,811.81
left - £70.19

debts:
lloyds tsb cc £14462.12 @ 14.9%
jd store card £407 @29.9%
mbna cc £12799.54 @16.9%
tesco cc £4157 @ 6.9%
mbna cc £204.06 @16.9%
lloyds o/d £5827
total: £37856.72

I am due a bonus which i am going to use to pay off the jd card, mbna (204.56) and i have made a payment of £300 on my other mbna card.
I have not missed any payments has yet, I rang all the companys and asked to reduce the apr one was 24.9%:eek: . I dont know how i do it but always seem to get the money from somewhere to make the payments but i just want to get rid of them all together. I am lucky in that my boss pays for my dinner at work and so therfore i do not eat at night:D . My shopping bill is very small this week i spent £22.00. we are eating out of the cupboeards and the freezer. Any advise that anyone can give will be appreciated but it is nice to know that i am not alone anymore and i can get through this. Kids have been great they are finding things for us to put on ebay so hopefully that will help. I have savings of £1200 but i done really wany to use this yet as i keep this incase i carnt find the cash to pay my payments i have always got something to fall back on. My oh has just had a pay rse so might try to get more money out of him. He dont pay for anything else I have to find money for clothes, bithdays, christmas holidays which he expects 2 foreighn holidays a year which I have been providing at a cost of around £8000 per year with spending money.
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Comments

  • lynzpower
    lynzpower Posts: 25,311 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    ]hello there
    lucky for you you have a load of ways to cut back here


    Monthly Incoming:
    My salary - £1120
    Oh half of bills - £720
    Benefits - £42

    Total - £1882

    Monthly Outgoings:

    Secure Homes - £1280 this includes: payment care, death plan, savings, mortgage death plan,council tax, sky, phone, gas, house ins, pet insurance, mortgage plus £265 overpayment, car tax for 2 cars, water bill,and tv licence) ( can you break this down, what does each of these cost?)

    t.v ins for dd -£18.90 (3mths left) ( insurance on tvs? what is this?)
    car ins -£48.95 ( checked its the cheapest?)
    t.v ins ds -£20-98 (3mths left) ( again whats this?_
    kids mags - £11.98 (cancelling) ( GOOD start ! )
    mobile phone -£35 (16mts left) ( PHONE THEM GET THEM TO REDUCE CONTRACT TO LOWEST TARRIFF)
    moblie dd - £35 (16mts left) ( AS ABOVE)
    mobile ds - £55 (7mts left) ( WHAT- NO WAY SHOULD A KID HAVE A BILL TIHS BIG- GET IT RIGHT DOWN! )
    savings - £80 (10 me, ds 5 and dd 5)per week ( YOU SHOUD NEVER SAVE WHEN YOU HAVE DEBTS, HOW MUCH IS THERE)
    school dinner -£80 ( TAKE PACK UPS)
    petrol - £80 ( GET IT AT TESCOS AND BANK THE CLUBCARD POINTS!)
    milk man -£6 ( BUY MILK IN SUPERMARKETS ITS CHEAPER)
    electric -£60 ( SEEMS HIGH CHECK OUT WWW.EST.ORG.UK)
    Total: £1,811.81
    left - £70.19 ( WHERE DOES THIS GO, START SPEND DIARY & PAY OFF DEBTS WITH THIS!)

    youve missed out a lot of other stuff tho, presents, dentist, prescriptions, clothing, food - what do you normally spend)

    No offence, but it sounds like you have a !!!!!! deal here
    My oh has just had a pay rse so might try to get more money out of him. He dont pay for anything else I have to find money for clothes, bithdays, christmas holidays which he expects 2 foreighn holidays a year which I have been providing at a cost of around £8000 per year with spending money

    Why on earth should everything be your responsiblity??
    :beer: Well aint funny how its the little things in life that mean the most? Not where you live, the car you drive or the price tag on your clothes.
    Theres no dollar sign on piece of mind
    This Ive come to know...
    So if you agree have a drink with me, raise your glasses for a toast :beer:
  • ds phone was upgraded so they will not let me change the tariff, thats just line rental for £55 a month. Will cancel milkman, insurance is on lcd tvs i no im in debt but carnt seem to say no to the kids i feel guilty saying no. they both paid half trowards them. car insurance was the cheapest at the time of renewal will start checking again when it is due in january. kids have around £200 each saved i have £1200. electis is on a meter i find it easier this way i am with npower for both gas and electric and get £80 rebate each year. dentist we got free last year but we go for check ups every 6 mts cost £10 for me free for kids oh pays for himself. Kids clothes come from ebay had some good bargins and they were named. any cash left at the end of the month goes straight to the debts.
  • hypno06
    hypno06 Posts: 32,296 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Well, I have to say that I am amazed at the amount you are spending on the line rental etc for phones for a 12 and 13 year old! My 2 are the same age and get £10 a month max spent on PAYG and very often this lasts them for far more than a month.

    The same with the telly etc. OK so they have paid half, but how much have you paid, and how much are you paying for insurance etc in total. Are the kids paying half of this too?

    At 13, is there any way that this one could get a paper round to fund their expenses?

    I know it is difficult but you will have to decide how serious you are at wanting to crack this debt thing, and if you are serious, then you have to get the whole family involved one way or another.

    So, what is your OH paying for - if he insists on expensive holidays, can he afford them? If not, then no holiday, or at the very least a cheap one.

    The kids will have to learn that money does not grow on trees and that if you want expensive phone contracts they have to be paid for somehow. Otherwise they may end up with no appreciation of the true value of money, will expect to have the latest "stuff" and will end up in debt themselves in the future.

    I hope this doesn't sound too harsh, but cutbacks will be needed and big changes made. It won't be easy, but it can be done. You do, however, need to be strong here and to be fully committed to becoming debt free.

    Good luck and keep on posting. You will get loads of advice and support on these boards.
    Successful women can still have their feet on the ground. They just wear better shoes. (Maud Van de Venne)
    Life begins at the end of your comfort zone (Neale Donald Walsch)
  • Sea78
    Sea78 Posts: 6,185 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker Debt-free and Proud!
    hi, welcome to the board :hello:

    I have to echo about the kids phones- how much?!!

    Also, what does your OH contribute to? Does he pay for food, or the kids clothes etc? Half of the bills that you have (not inc the debts) is £905 not £720!! Also why are you paying for the hols etc? Or does he pay half for these? He must know how much you've got coming in and even without the debt repayments, you're only just paying off the 'essentials' (although these can be cut down). How does he think you've been funding all the other stuff?

    Sea xx
    CCCS DMP:Feb 07
    Total:£37,016.47 now £0 DEBT FREE FEB 14

    2022 Decluttering Campaign 49/1011
  • Sea78
    Sea78 Posts: 6,185 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker Debt-free and Proud!
    OK - just read it again, and you've already said he paysfor nothing else - sorry, that'll teach me to look more closely!

    He must know you're in debt (even if he's ignoring it) as how else would he be getting presents, food, kids being clothed etc, let alone the holidays!! He needs to know that you can't finance him any more - even if you don't tell him abou the debt, you can easily show him it's just not financially possible!
    CCCS DMP:Feb 07
    Total:£37,016.47 now £0 DEBT FREE FEB 14

    2022 Decluttering Campaign 49/1011
  • kids have said that they want a cheap sun £9.50 holiday next year, OH knows that i carnt afford all these things but just engnores the fact that he dont pay for anythng all he pays for is half of secure homes and i get an extra £20
  • kids have said that they want a cheap sun £9.50 holiday next year, OH knows that i carnt afford all these things but just engnores the fact that he dont pay for anythng all he pays for is half of secure homes and i get an extra £20 (arnt i the lucky one) DS has just got a weekend job with a friend, he has offered him £60 per weekend and he has siad i can have this, bless him. The tvs are both paid for it is just the insurance for the next 5 yrs if they break down (both LCD) Both kids know that they carnthave everything they want they know im in debt but not how much (they dont need to know). To be honest i c=dont think OH cares how i do it if i was honest i think if i was financially better off, so would i lol. thanks for the replys they are very helpful. Boss also talking of helping me out, hes great dont know what i would do with out him.
  • OH salary for the month £3500 so he can well afford to give me more but refuses.
  • OH salary for the month £3500 so he can well afford to give me more but refuses.

    :rotfl: :rotfl: HE REFUSES??????????? - Your'e having a laugh right.:confused:

    What do you mean he refuses?

    Ask him again, if he *refuses* tell him to pack his bags and sling his hook!!!
  • zorber
    zorber Posts: 1,107 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Phone Bills Wow kids should not have that amount, but you have already had that stick, 12 months free contract phones exist when you claim cashback lots of free minutes, would have been ideal.

    Ok cancel kids mags, cancel sky, why on earth are you overpaying on your mortgage when you have high intrest debts, kill your savings and pay off your debts first, all the others have already been mentioned by lynzpower.

    Your oh is stupid if he is not helping you pay off debts, your relationship should be more like a business if one part of a business is failling and is not helped to be turned around it could bring the whole business down.

    realise and realise quickly the longer you are in debt the more it costs you, the less you can actual spend on things you wish for and ignore this now the less pleasent your retirement will be in 20 30 or 40 years time, you need to turn this around and start saving to get a pleasent relaxed retirement (longway off i know) and your oh need to help !!
    "Save the cheerleader - Save the world"
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