How to stop 2 year old coming into mum and dad's room at night?

delain

My toddler has a safety gate on her door. She's used to it and doesn't find it upsetting, she goes to bed happily at night. If she needs me she lets me know. If she cries OH or I go to her. At 6.20 this morning it was

"mummy! Mummy! MUMMY! WANT GET UP!" Followed by "baby awake now" Erm, yes, I wonder why, maybe it was the sargeant major wake up call :rotfl: (she shares with her 1 year old sister)

Our HV was pleased to see our gates (we have 4 ) as was an SW who visited once.

notanewuser

lindseykim13 wrote: »

My only other suggestion is one of the ready beds on the floor of mum and dads room, we have used them when weaning out of our bed at around age 4 for the odd night whilst they were growing out of it.

We have one of those for when we stay with relatives etc. DD loves it, BUT its so flipping noisy when she moves about it wakes her up!!

claire16c

lindseykim13 wrote: »

I agree but clearly the mum and dad aren't getting any sleep with a screaming toddler when he's taken back. They will either have to play the screaming game for a week or just let him sleep with them for an hour or 2.

My only other suggestion is one of the ready beds on the floor of mum and dads room, we have used them when weaning out of our bed at around age 4 for the odd night whilst they were growing out of it.

But one week of no sleep is surely better than disrupted sleep for years if you don't/can't sleep well with a toddler in the bed?

notanewuser

claire16c wrote: »

But one week of no sleep is surely better than disrupted sleep for years if you don't/can't sleep well with a toddler in the bed?

Which is why there isn't one solution that suits everyone.

daska

LOL, DS2 had the gates sussed shortly after his 1st birthday.

Can he actually sleep through? Something must be waking him and while it's probably just habitual it's worth making sure other reasons are ruled out. Some reasons are obvious such as is he warm enough, too warm, do the pipes knock, are car headlights shining through the curtains? Other's are less obvious such as sensory problems - DS2 barely slept until he was nearly 5 but that literally changed overnight due to using a tight hat.

If you don't work perhaps you could volunteer to do the repetitive returning him to his own bed every time he gets up for a week? I can't think of any more wonderful gift for a parent than allowing them to sleep... Make sure he's warm enough but not overheating, isn't thirsty or needing a wee etc. but from then on always use exactly the same phrase and don't engage in any other way - i.e. do it gently but don't spend time settling them every time they get up, don't get angry with them etc.

keystone

How to stop 2 year old coming into mum and dad's room at night?

Ms_Chocaholic

Mum and dad need to go to bed earlier/when their child goes to bed for a week, they can take it in turns to get up and put him back to bed and hopefully by the time the week is out the situation will be resolved.

By going to bed early (latest 10.00 pm?), they will at least get 7.30 hours sleep before the little one wakes.

DevilsAdvocate1

meritaten wrote: »

stairgates are for stairs not toddlers doors!

I agree with putting them straight back into their own beds - as many times as it takes! after a couple of nights - the toddler does give up! it does mean a few nights where parents get little or no sleep - best for them to take it in shifts.

That's not always the case. My friend always used to tell me off for letting my sons come into our room as she believed this would go on forever. I was shocked when I commented recently that she looked very tired. Turns out her 2 boys, who are now 12 and 10, get up every single night.:eek: And every single night she gets out of bed and takes them back to their own room. Her husband sleeps through it all. Turns out he was the one who was against them coming into their room.

But 12 and 10 - wow. Still getting up every night :eek:

daska

Do they have some other underlying problem? Continuing poor sleep is often found in kids with ASD (who usually have sensory issues) and other conditions, I was speaking with a lady yesterday who has one child who is severely autistic and another with downs syndrome, she was pretty much just black eyes with a body attached, poor lady is at her wit's end. Most kids stop doing this well before 10, usually quite naturally of their own accord.

DevilsAdvocate1

daska wrote: »

Do they have some other underlying problem? Continuing poor sleep is often found in kids with ASD (who usually have sensory issues) and other conditions, I was speaking with a lady yesterday who has one child who is severely autistic and another with downs syndrome, she was pretty much just black eyes with a body attached, poor lady is at her wit's end. Most kids stop doing this well before 10, usually quite naturally of their own accord.

No, they are both bright boys and doing well at school. And both parents are nurse practitioners, so I would have thought that they would know if there were any issues.

The thing that shocked me the most is that she always used to go on about how wrong I was for letting my children come into my bed at night. Yet all of mine stopped doing this years ago. I think they feel safe knowing that they can if they want to and so they don't.