Uncommitted partner

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Hi lazarou,

We have a very recent thread on this that should help so I've merged your thread with it to keep all the replies together.

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fizzel81

lazarou_true wrote: »

So, last night I made some delicious soup (based on thrifty ways recipe). I had my share and left some for my OH in pan. During my meeting I received a message from him saying "I'm not eating that blah blah". Now if this soup had come in a branded tin, he would have eaten it, It really annoys me.:mad:

Now this isn't the first time, the last time I used the slow cooker, I did chicken thighs with loads of veg. Unfortunately due to my use of red cabbage the entire concoction (sic?) was very purple, so again Oh refused to eat it. My DS isn't as fussy and eat all of his and even finished OH's.

Does anyone elses OH kick against their OS / moneysaving ways? Come to think of it he's started getting shirty about own brand tins in cupboards / watering down of juices too.

Sorry rant over.

im now seperated but my ex was exactly the same, it got to the point where half my shopping budget was going on crisps,chocolate,pastys as he just would not eat the things i had cook (unless it was a roast dinner!)
im glad i stuck to it as now he has gone my shopping has more than halved the boys and 1 eat very well for nowhere near as much, my nearly 4 year old has calmed down alot.

i think as bad as it sounds you will have to keep pushing him (men done like being hungry) and as long as he doesnt head down the snack route he will come round in time.

going off topic here i know what my boys have had when they have been with there dad by how the act when they get home

trying harder o/s ways has been better for me than just saving some money (which is what i orignally come here for), i have and still am saving money by what i cook/buy/clean with, ive cut down on landfill (by going washable nappy route) but mostly my boys are better for it

Cazzdevil

I suppose I should consider myself lucky, my OH is very supportive in my quest to save money and is more than happy to spend as little as possible on food and make it stretch as far as we can. He seems more than happy with my cooking too and hs already said he prefers HM pizza and curry and seems really keen to make things from scratch (for the health aspect of it too I reckon).

I'm surprised at some of the replies on this thread actually, I would've thought anyone would jump at the chance to save money in areas where it's possible to so that you can free up money for other things (going out, paying off debts, saving up for a new car etc...). Beggars belief.

belfastgirl23

If your DH can't cope with the concept of watching the pennies then don't tell him about it! Yes you want to make a lifestyle change but it's all a matter of finding a way to put it to him that will make sense to him. There are different ways to approach it. One would be not to mention money at all but to find other reasons to shop and eat differently, eg you want to eat more healthily (if he is a fitness person) or you want to shop more locally (if he is inclined towards greenness). I got around the sainsburys thing a bit by having shopping delivered from Tesco (sainsburys in my area didn't deliver till very recently) so I could claim it was a time saving and could also really properly rummage around prices etc. For a lot of things I didn't (and still don't) mention money at all. I just point out the damage something can do to the waistline or say I don't fancy it. He doesn't necessarily need to know that it's cos I think it's a waste of money.

If you can't think of how to do it this way then you need to find something to put the saved money towards that you all (but especially him) want but currently can't afford, eg a new TV or a holiday or something?

It's finding something to trigger his lightbulb moment, once you've done that then it's just debating the finer points eg is Marks bread nicer than Sainsbury's bread (yes, unfortunately!).

Good luck!

Psykicpup

lazarou_true wrote: »

So, last night I made some delicious soup (based on thrifty ways recipe). I had my share and left some for my OH in pan. During my meeting I received a message from him saying "I'm not eating that blah blah". Now if this soup had come in a branded tin, he would have eaten it, It really annoys me.:mad: .

Im not sure which would have annoyed me more - that he was being a snob by not eating the food I had lovingly prepared or that he felt the need to rext & tell me so while I was in a meeting:rolleyes:
(sorry to hijack there but I just had to comment!):o

KittyKate

Psykicpup wrote: »

Im not sure which would have annoyed me more - that he was being a snob by not eating the food I had lovingly prepared or that he felt the need to rext & tell me so while I was in a meeting:rolleyes:
(sorry to hijack there but I just had to comment!):o

I totally agree! I think he should at least appreciate your efforts, maybe he can offer to cook if he hates your food so much lazarou!

Thankfully my OH is more OS than me, he is a well built man and he likes big portions - a ready meal wouldn't touch the sides!

Cheap_Date

Hello All. Happy New Year!!:beer:

I wondered if anyone has a problem with a partner that doesn't see the benefit of money saving old style?

I really want to embrace the January Grocery challenge and Feb., Mar. etc.!, and save as much as we can this year. We have three children, one of whom is registered disabled, so I am a stay at home mum and carer.

My husband is the main earner (only earner!!) so he feels, rightly or wrongly (wrongly I think :rolleyes: ) that he has the most say in where our money goes. He sometimes gets the chance to work lots of overtime and loves to visit Waitrose, Marks etc and buy lots of lovely food.:eek: This completely blows the budget, but when I try to express an opinion, he thinks it is only right that we treat ourselves. It is the only treat we get and it is his money. :mad:

It is the major cause of disagreements at home, and I thought I'd ask if anyone else was at odds with their partner re: money and saving. Is there any way round it?

Love your thoughts.

xxx

Pink.

Hi Cheap date,

There's an older thread that should help you a lot so I've merged your thread with it to keep all the suggestions together.

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Sola

I think the proof is in the pudding etc. My DH was very dubious, so I talked about it less and practiced more with home-cooked stuff (although I still have to rein him from getting take-aways a lot of the time). Now that I need him to share the burden of cooking and house stuff, he's getting with the plot; we went shopping on Sunday and he went round working out which coffee is the best value for money and decided he was going to get it elsewhere. I'm putting together a food file for him as he's terrified of cooking - we have 12-15 basic meals which we rotate, so I'll type up a step-by-step guide for each one for the days when he's cooking. I'll always have to be the one in control but he's happy to be led so it works out eventually. I've told him about the January grocery challenge, weekly meal-planning and shopping with cash only, he's working out where everything lives in the kitchen ... and has surprised me by washing-up two days on the trot without being asked. Small steps ...

Cheap_Date

Thanks Sola.

I think I'll keep quiet. The less said the better!! As long as there is good food, he doesn't need to know how cheap it is!! I think I'll have to stay in control! And as you say, small steps...!