Looking for the silver lining

Sun_Addict

Thanks all

Still haven't got round to looking at bank. Should do as I got paid on Wednesday, Mr SA's PIP back payment went in and he has also had notice of repayment of retention money from when he was roofing. Might have to let ESA people know about this as although it's from 2012/13 before he got ill, tax and NIC has been taken off it and it might get cross referenced to his ESA and they might think hang on a minute why's he got paid. No idea why this has suddenly appeared as he was meant to get this back last year. Maybe the firm were waiting to see if he snuffed it to see if they could get away with repaying it. For those who don't know retention is taken from sub contractors every week as a percentage of their earnings in case they bodge a job and then disappear leaving the firm to pay someone else to put it right. There was over £600 due to him and after tax and NIC he's got almost £500.

Anyway will sit down tomorrow and go through everything.

Mr SA has been a bit off today and has been a bit random and sleepy. We get the results of the MRI next Tuesday and he's starting to get stressed. I'm sure it will be ok but have one concern with his bowel control which is not good. Hoping this is just a result of brain injury. Had a couple of incidences on holiday when I had to clear up after him and clean him up. He gets distressed about it and the fact he can't control it. I just hope it's not a type of seizure.

Sun_Addict

Morning all - finally been online banking this morning. Added up all the odds bits and bobs and have paid £30.40 into the VSP making this £155.03 and have paid £80 off debt to round it down to £2300. Will have a proper look at what's what over the weekend. Just wanted to see what had gone in and pay a few bills. We have been bunging quite a bit on the spending CC just lately so will need to pay that off when it rolls over. Then I'll be able to see how much we've really got. Need to get my budget head back on - it's coming back slowly!

*Robin*

Glad to read you and MrSA had a great holiday!

I wonder if something like the medi-pendant in the link below, worn on a short chain around MrSA's neck - where anyone facing him would see it - might be useful to alert people that he is not drunk and may need assistance (on occasions when you're not nearby)?

https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/171899586/heart-medical-id-pendant-steel-red?ref=shop_home_active_22

beanielou

I found that when I started finally using the walking stick(which was a really really big thing for me) that people were more tolerant & less likely to think I was drunk.Ho hum.

Sun_Addict

Thanks ladies Beanie - just like you did Mr SA is resisting using the walking stick although he needs it most of the time. I think he thinks if he uses it he's given in. I've lost count of the times he's grabbed hold of me for balance and nearly had both of us over! Robin - good idea but he's a stubborn chap and won't accept he's disabled. I think most people guess there's something not right he has a look about him that gives it away.

Anyway he has been a pain the last two days. Saturday he wanted to go into town "just for a coffee". I didn't feel like it but decided to indulge him. We had a coffee and he had a cake too. I asked him if he wanted the loo before we left and he said no. 30 minutes later he needed the loo, was tired, hungry and thirsty. We were looking round a shop and had to abandon it and go for lunch even though it was only 11.45. I wasn't even hungry. Then after lunch he decided he desperately needed a new summer jacket. So we very slowly shuffled round the shops while he tried on jacket after jacket - none of which were right. He also loudly announced he needed the loo in the middle of a shop so we had to go off hunting for one. Then when we returned home empty handed he went to bed for a sleep while I had to iron, clean, cook, etc. He is just like a child.

Today he decided we were gardening. This consisted of him mowing the lawn and then sleeping for 4 hours while I did all the weeding and clearing. It was good he managed to mow the lawn but it exhausted him for the rest of the day. When he eventually emerged from his slumbers he wandered about in a bewildered state with his dressing gown hanging off his shoulders.

He's still anxious about the results on Tuesday and has been very morose tonight.

I need another holiday!!!

Buffythedebtslayer

Blimey SA, that sounds rough. It must be almost impossible to see him like that. Next time he wants a jacket get him to look online? Although I don't suppose it really works like that.


Just hang on till Tuesday. I have no clue how you did all that gardening! I was shattered after a couple of hours.


take care XXX

please-let-me-be-lucky

Could you maybe search for a jacket without him (during lunch time or online perhaps) and then turn up with it in a kind of "saw this and thought of you" way? Xx

Sun_Addict

Thanks both - since he put on weight he's struggling to find anything that fits - he's XL or sometimes XXL!!! It's sad that he's not really the same person anymore. I try not to dwell on it too much and just thank god that's he's still here.

debtfreewannabe321

I'm so glad you enjoyed the holiday and the sun (i'm missing the sun myself!). Good luck today with the MRI results xx

*Robin*

Keeping all digits crossed for a good result today, Sun.A..

Your account of a shopping expedition with MrSA was enlightening; it must be so very difficult for you both coming to terms with the changes in your lives, especially as MrSA is unwilling to accept his current status of 'disabled'.
Truly, I applaud your strength and love for your DH. :T