Ex taking me to county court for gifts

full-time-mum

Just read this thread as I couldn't believe the title - some people's behaviour is just beyond belief.

getcarter wrote: »

I've nothing to add to what other people have said just hugs and hold your head up high, you've nothing to worry about!

This sounds good advice.

It might be hard but if you can make it look to your ex as if you are just shrugging your shoulders and getting on with your life then maybe he will get bored - child psycology, if you are being called names at school and you cry then you will get called more names to make you cry more but if you just turn your back and ignore it, the bullies will eventually get bored.

Try some child psycology yourself. Just let your friends know that you have had a lightbulb moment and have realised that your ex is talking a load of hot air and that you are looking forward to the court case so you can get the whole thing settled. Hopefully it will get back to his friends and take the wind out of his sails.

Of course, let it be known, too, that you are getting really good marks with your uni work - must be because you've decided that your ex isn't going to ruin your life and focused your mind!!!:D He'll hate to think he's having a postive effect on your.

Rhizee

Hi Sallyanne,

Even in Small Claims Courts you still need evidence. I'm a Credit Controller and when we've gone to small claims with non-payers you still need to be specific and provide evidence of contracts and/or supply of goods, and also that you have previously tried to 'settle before court' by providing copies of all evidence to your debtor, preferably by recorded delivery.

If your ex files he will have to provide evidence, in writing, to the court. They then send you a copy of this with a form for you to fill in detailing your reply. He will then get a copy of your reply, and will again have to provide evidence of why your reply is incorrect. If he hasn't given up by then the courts will then set a hearing date - which can be months ahead. During this time he can at any point withdraw his claim, if he ever comes to his senses!

Small claims are usually very informal - just you, the judge, your ex and any solicitors involved and (even better) you don't even have to have a solicitor - no costs !! CAB & Uni councillors give any advice for free, which will be just as good in your case, and you can have them to accompany you if you want some moral support.

As it's not a 'criminal' matter but just about money you ex is claiming you owe I don't think character witness statements or your boyfriend's injuries will be considered relivant by the judge. It will, however, be very relevant if you intend to claim damages against him for harassment/emotional distress & bullying when he loses! (You probably will need a solicitor for that, but go for a no win no fee one).

Keep strong girl, he's obviously an idiot if he thinks he's got a claim with nothing in writing!!

changkra

sallyanne1984 wrote: »

The police are basically telling me to stop worrying and don't let this get to you. I dont think they have taken it seriously and apparently because the letters are to do with the court they can't do anything anyway. I get the impression that they think its laughable when it's a serious thing to me, to be bullied like this.

:mad:

Do you know whether or not you are dealing with actual Police Officers or are they Specials?

BC_Rangers

sallyanne1984 wrote: »

Thanks for your replies guys. Hes also send another letter, this morning in fact saying he does not have 'time' to call me or meet me to discuss all this as he has exams etc at uni ( I know he has finished for the year). It sounds like he realises that I'm not listening to his rubbish. When I went to his house he refused to show evidence. I did send a letter after the first letter asking for evidence which he ignored. :mad:

Furthermore, he requests that all contact is done by letter alone. Why? Surely he has to? The letter is also rather insulting referring that I am stupid etc. Should I take this to the police? The police have already been around to his house once to have a word. This is freaking me out. In the meantime he is still saying he is'nt stalking me!

Thanks

Well, however much of a nutter this guy may be ; if he is insisting on the most formal method of communication possible , how can that be stalking? You did go round to his door. If you are that intimidated by him , then don't go near his property as its unlikely you will benefit from such a visit.

Did you mean "inferring" RE The content of the letter(s) he sent?

I'd like to offer my neutral best wishes to you in this matter - there are two sides to every story , and I have been involved in one such "story" in the past!


Take care.

looby75

just wondering if there is any news on whats happened with this?

Iamthesmartestmanalive

I cant believe the responses to this thread

There are 2 sides to the story, and the libelous comments etc are shocking

Apparently he is a stalker? why because he wants his money back

Id suggest the OP fights her battles were they belong in court instead of giving her highly prejudiced version of events and slandering her it would seem very generous ex

looby75

Iamthesmartestmanalive wrote: »

I cant believe the responses to this thread

There are 2 sides to the story, and the libelous comments etc are shocking

Apparently he is a stalker? why because he wants his money back

Id suggest the OP fights her battles were they belong in court instead of giving her highly prejudiced version of events and slandering her it would seem very generous ex

are you the ex boyfriend??

superscaper

Iamthesmartestmanalive wrote: »

There are 2 sides to the story, and the libelous comments etc are shocking

What libellous comments? Noone has been identified on this thread AFAIK. OP could be making the whole thing up for all I know, that doesn't mean anything libellous has happened on this thread and by definition nothing slanderous can happen.

Iamthesmartestmanalive

superscaper wrote: »

What libellous comments? Noone has been identified on this thread AFAIK. OP could be making the whole thing up for all I know, that doesn't mean anything libellous has happened on this thread and by definition nothing slanderous can happen.

He has been called a !!!!!!, stalker, bully etc etc

All fairly libelous imo

Secondly I can just imagine if the OP was male and the pursuer was female

Oh how dare you take her money, how dare you not pay it back, how dare you move on , how dare you ignore her letters etc etc

Women and their little armies are ridicolous, I bet a male judge laughs her out of court and orders she repays the "gifts"

rsykes2000

Iamthesmartestmanalive wrote: »

He has been called a !!!!!!, stalker, bully etc etc

All fairly libelous imo

Secondly I can just imagine if the OP was male and the pursuer was female

Oh how dare you take her money, how dare you not pay it back, how dare you move on , how dare you ignore her letters etc etc

Women and their little armies are ridicolous, I bet a male judge laughs her out of court and orders she repays the "gifts"

For 'the smartest man' you do come across as a bit of an argumentative cretin to be honest. The comments are possibly out of order but not libellous - no-one is identified. Yes we are hearing solely one side of the story but if it is the truth then the OP has nothing to fear re payments back - no judge will make anyone pay back money for gifts that were freely given in a relationship.