Buffy takes babysteps.

chevalier

tattycath wrote: »

And now it's 12.45am and I'm wide awake and I only had 5 hours sleep last night.
These days every night I'm uncomfortably hot...been told this could last a while. Apparently 'it's my age!' :rotfl:

Well at least you will save on heating....:rotfl:

Buffythedebtslayer

Rough week. did my three things but they basically come down to lunch guinea pigs and one other thing. I haven't cleaned out the piggies. need to do that today. Went out last night which was good although now I feel wrung out. I slept loads which did make me feel better but........

Mum is so depressed which I am feeling is too much to deal with for me. She is upset up about the house (I have stuff everywhere and the dogs are apparently a night mare.) I have to be honest, since I do much of the reorganising and tidying up when she goes to Florida and then a few months later it is all the same and.........

To be honest I don't want to get into all that today. bit negative. It is there as a problem. I can't do much else apart from keeping going and getting a grip. I did sort some money stuff out and did last night on cash.

The aim for today is wardrobe, guinea pigs.....that is it for now.

Only really posting to let you know I am still alive.

x

beanielou

Big hugs hun xx

Buffythedebtslayer

Managed to do nothing yesterday. Went out to dinner which was good but ate too much and was ill when I got home which rather put a downer on the evening!!

Today I just wanted my boyfriend and a clean room but as we had guests neither of those things were going to happen.

I think I have upset Mum. but I am so tired and sad and fed up I can't manage to work out how. Well no I can, I can be a sarky !!!!! although I did apologise in front of everyone twice. I can't help it. well ok I can since I am not a child but I was just bloody annoyed. Maybe she is just tired.

I really hope so.

Can't wait for her birthday. I have plans, Cinema night...........

Start of another week tomorrow. got to get up early to mark before work. could not bring myself to do it over the weekend.

well before I depress the knickers off everyone I shall go to bed.

I honestly think I miss the man and feel out of sorts cos I haven't spoke to him properly.

pathetic!

xxxxxx

elantan

Buffy is there any way you can afford to move out? Just wondering if maybe if you had your own place things with your mum could improve? My friend found that whilst she lived with her mum they fought like cat and dog and yet when she moved to her own place ( literally round the corner) the two of them seemed to get in much better

gwen80

Hi Buffy

I just wanted to stop by and say 'Hi' :-). I hope this week goes a little better for you? When is your Easter break?

I can relate to a lot of the themes in your posts. My Mum is on her own as well and I struggle with the feeling of responsibility towards her, then resentment, then guilt because of the resentment etc etc. Unfortunately, I know how debt/living situations/stressful jobs can leave you feeling trapped. Have you spoken to a doctor about how you're feeling? Could you get any therapy?

The other thing is, I think the further you fall down the hole or the longer you're in it, the harder it is to climb back out.

I'm glad you've met a lovely bf though, it gives me hope there are still some nice ones out there :-)

I hope you don't mind me posting.

Take care of yourself

Gwenx

Buffythedebtslayer

elantan wrote: »

Buffy is there any way you can afford to move out? Just wondering if maybe if you had your own place things with your mum could improve? My friend found that whilst she lived with her mum they fought like cat and dog and yet when she moved to her own place ( literally round the corner) the two of them seemed to get in much better

To be honest, I probably shouldn't have brought it up, yesterday was just a tough day and I needed to vent.

I really don't want to get in to the big things on this diary. It does sound mental but I have all I can cope with with the three things and keeping my brain from planning out the big ideas (and then crashing and burning) - I am sure that time will come but it isn't now.

thanks xxx

elantan

i understand ... sometimes venting is all thats needed and can really help

so, your three things for today?

Buffythedebtslayer

gwen80 wrote: »

Hi Buffy

I just wanted to stop by and say 'Hi' :-). I hope this week goes a little better for you? When is your Easter break?

I can relate to a lot of the themes in your posts. My Mum is on her own as well and I struggle with the feeling of responsibility towards her, then resentment, then guilt because of the resentment etc etc. Unfortunately, I know how debt/living situations/stressful jobs can leave you feeling trapped. Have you spoken to a doctor about how you're feeling? Could you get any therapy?

The other thing is, I think the further you fall down the hole or the longer you're in it, the harder it is to climb back out.

I'm glad you've met a lovely bf though, it gives me hope there are still some nice ones out there :-)

I hope you don't mind me posting.

Take care of yourself

Gwenx

Lovely to see you again Gwen! xxx

BF is lovely so far. Docs in holidays hopefully! which start next week THANK GOD.

xxx

Buffythedebtslayer

elantan wrote: »

i understand ... sometimes venting is all thats needed and can really help

so, your three things for today?

X

So glad you asked

because I am trying something new tonight.

have already made my lunch and I am going to go get ready for bed and feed the piggies. plus get clothes out for tomorrow (a normal habit that I had dropped out of)

I went to the supermarket today instead of tomorrrow cos it kills me on Tuesday to be honest!

******Just so this is vaguely money related £50 in Morrisons!!! I suppose it was a big shop (end of term chocolates, razors (not connected!!) Easter cards) but still.....I was hoping for cheaper - however whilst somethings were cheaper others were more expensive than Sainsburys.*****

Essentially I am trying to do stuff earlier so I can sit here (sofa) and just prep for tomorrow with out stuff hanging over me.

so yes best get on before it becomes late!!!


quick summary

1. feed piggies
2. get ready for bed/clothes tomorrow
3. plan tomorrow

xx