Not a good day to be single

supermum38

ImDoingItForMe wrote: »

Well ive today just told the guy im seeing its not working out for me. Been sitting here a few weeks wondering if hes the right guy. Wont go into why its not working, but its got to me today of all days, more than anyother day has. I want it to work, but cant see it ever will. Hes let me down this weekend again. Not known him long, but if the last month or so has anything to go by, the way his life is wont changed. His previous girlfriends ended it for the same reason. Maybe thinking time for him, i think.

Well done for making a really difficult decision on a day like today!
One thing I learned over the years is that it is easy to see very early on in a relationship things that will eventually damage it.
I was with my first husband for 12 years and there were so many 'let downs' but I could not see it. Eventually, I found the strength to walk away and when I did, I realised I should have done it a lot sooner. I now don't take any nonsense (you will see from my other thread that I have been single for a couple of years) and as soon as there is something I don't like I walk away. It saves so much pain in the long run. As they say ' a leopard never changes his spots' and if you want a good example, it's been 14 years since I split from my first husband and he is still a B*****D!

[Deleted User]

supermum38 wrote: »

Well done for making a really difficult decision on a day like today!
One thing I learned over the years is that it is easy to see very early on in a relationship things that will eventually damage it.
I was with my first husband for 12 years and there were so many 'let downs' but I could not see it. Eventually, I found the strength to walk away and when I did, I realised I should have done it a lot sooner. I now don't take any nonsense (you will see from my other thread that I have been single for a couple of years) and as soon as there is something I don't like I walk away. It saves so much pain in the long run. As they say ' a leopard never changes his spots' and if you want a good example, it's been 14 years since I split from my first husband and he is still a B*****D!

I feel pretty gutted atm to be honest. This was my last ditch attempt at meeting a normal guy. Ive been there, done it and had enough to the point of what is the point of being with anyone? They all start off with the caring, ile be there for you emotions, but when push comes to shove theyve all let me down to the point where i feel cynical. Not one guy ive met in the last year has even lived up to what theyve said in those first few weeks of meeting. Been let down and im worth more, if the lastest guy doesnt realise it now, then its his loss. Ive given up trying. So im sittting here with the liitle gifts i bought him and thinking what a waste of the last few months.....

System

It kind of bothered me when i was single, but i just went and got drunk with friends so didn't really care in the end. I have to say there have been sooo many passive agressive statuses today and people trotting out the whole "ooh its just a mass produced card company conspiracy". Fair enough if you think that but don't go complaining people are ramming it down your throat when you're doing exactly the same thing with your anti valentines day view. [/rant]

I see it s just a bit of harmless fun, i dont think it does any harm. If you want to celebrate it GREAT if you don't THAT's GREAT TOO. Either embrace it or ignore it, there's no need for everyone to be getting so angry about it

I think what i'm trying to say is its one day..

Bangton

I can totally understand why a single person might feel rubbish today. Me and my partner don't celebrate Valentines Day either but just coming home to him on an evening is precious enough for me.

That said, there are plenty of people in miserable relationships who might well be wishing they were free and single so embrace it. If you want a partner get out there, if you don't don't let some random day make you feel you should be in a partnership : )

scooby088

I am with my partner for four years now, we both have never seen the need to be extra special lovey dovey to one another on the 14th feb. Just another commercial way of extracting the money out of you.

To me valentines day is just a day of love, but when you are in a relationship you love everyday not just once a year on 14th february.

Abbafan1972

I am married and we don't buy into all of that commercialism. It's just a waste of money!

squirrelchops

My Birthday was yesterday so I had my treats then.....it's a right f***er having it next to Valentine's Day as it is always too dear to go away and if my birthday is a Friday then everywhere is all geared up for Valentine's Day.....and as others have said this is more ££££

OH didn't get me anything as I had my Birthday pressies yesterday and I got him a 59p card! This was not in the least bit romantic, was jokey as I hate all the vomit inducing nonsense out there.
.
I bought OH some bubble bath - he felt terrible that he didn't buy me anything, the wally

lorena

I wouldn't worry about it. I'm in a relationship but I live with my bf who is unemployed. We're both upset by the situation we are in (i work full time so pay all our rent and bills) and it's a struggle everyday. I don't feel in the Valentine's mood in the slightest. Whilst I wouldn't be without him, it's not always greener on the other side. Even if we had wanted to go out tonight we couldn't afford it and I felt under pressure to give off a 'happy couple' impression when we were in the supermarket earlier. So don't feel bad, Valentine's day is just an excuse to sell people pink things with hearts on

miss_independent

VestanPance wrote: »

Today doesn't bother me in the slightest.

I find Christmas and New Years to be depressing times to be single, but valentines day never did mean anything to me.

I completely agree with this. I'm fine with Valentines Day, in fact I enjoy it and give little tokens to my family and we generally act a bit silly whilst celebrating Love! Like the rest of the year, I feel that I don't have to be in a relationship to have fun and receive/give love and appreciation. I have had miserable Valentines Days in the past but now I'm in my late twenties, I just try to enjoy it like any other day. I feel the tug/ache of loneliness more over Christmas and notice I miss having a boyfriend at those times more so than Valentines.

supermum38

miss_independent wrote: »

I completely agree with this. I'm fine with Valentines Day, in fact I enjoy it and give little tokens to my family and we generally act a bit silly whilst celebrating Love! Like the rest of the year, I feel that I don't have to be in a relationship to have fun and receive/give love and appreciation. I have had miserable Valentines Days in the past but now I'm in my late twenties, I just try to enjoy it like any other day. I feel the tug/ache of loneliness more over Christmas and notice I miss having a boyfriend at those times more so than Valentines.

The most valid point you make is that there are other days that make us singletons feel lonely too, like Xmas. That's the worst for me. But also my birthday although at least my teenage boys do try.
I think the point about this thread and other threads are that Valentines is just one of many of days of celebration when it would be nice to have a partner to spend it with.
I'm not materialistic and just a cup of coffee in bed would make a day special for me...it's just been so long since I've had that kind of attention and probably about 5 years since I had any gesture on Valentines day...my sons are lads and there was no chance of them giving their mum a valentines card!
My heart goes out to all of you who feel like me but I always say to myself 'maybe this time next year, I'll have a partner' and this keeps me from breaking down in tears.
Also, thanks to all the lovely comments on this thread and my other one, I have been laughing and smiling on a day when I would usually break my rule and have a bottle of vino on a school night.
No wine tonight!:D