"friends" who love drama

Cherry_Bomb

Loving the 'Facebook is the work of the devil' replies going on here.

Whether you like it or not social networking is huge and with over a billion users on Facebook and Twitter alone some of you are in serious danger of sounding like a group of prehistoric '' in my day'' type folk.

High 5'ing each other for either not having an account or because you deactivated your account?
Really get a grip. It doesn't make you better people than those who do have accounts and enjoy using them.

It's quite obvious it's not Facebook that's the problem. It's some of the people using it.

OP you really do sound better off without your so called best friend. She absolutely loves the drama

marisco_2

In answer to your question, no I dont have friends like you describe. I wouldn't mix with such people, they sound beyond childish. Lets face it, with friends like that you dont need any enemies do you!

You are an adult OP, so if you choose to remove someone from your facebook account that is your prerogative. From what you advise us, this person you wished to disassociate yourself from, was not being pleasant about you or supportive toward you.

For another friend to take such offense and treat you badly is unecessary. What type of woman goes around effectively saying 'if you wont be nice to xxxx you cant come to my house or to my parties'. That carry on is left behind in school playgrounds by most of us. I work with more mature seven year olds.

Do yourself a huge favour and find a better group of friends. The ones you have sound like pains in the @rse.

abailey54

I'm another one who deactivated my account and have a different account for occasional comps and coupons. I found it exciting at first but I was fed up of it and simply moved on

Facebook's an odd thing, but I think you're making a statement when you delete someone (well, except for those people you have very tenuous connections with). I don't see what business this is of your other friend's though - this woman upset you and you cut communication with her. End of

In any way, friends have forgiven much worse ills than falling out with a mutual friend so I'm not sure how much of a keeper she is. I'd rather have no friends than ones who make me feel like crap

lostinrates

Cherry_Bomb wrote: »

Loving the 'Facebook is the work of the devil' replies going on here.

Whether you like it or not social networking is huge and with over a billion users on Facebook and Twitter alone some of you are in serious danger of sounding like a group of prehistoric '' in my day'' type folk.

High 5'ing each other for either not having an account or because you deactivated your account?
Really get a grip. It doesn't make you better people than those who do have accounts and enjoy using them.

It's quite obvious it's not Facebook that's the problem. It's some of the people using it.

OP you really do sound better off without your so called best friend. She absolutely loves the drama

I am not clear. Are you saying that people who have Facebook are better people because they are not prehistoric back in the day types?

Fwiw, I agree it's the people using it, or the way people use it. But you could say the same about guns, which many people hate.

And I am a prehistoric type, I don't have Facebook. Tried for about half an hour once and decided it wasn't for me, though it was funny looking up people I have dropped out of contact with. I can see what a great tool it could be, but it's not one I care to use ATM.

Ladyhawk

I'm with Cherry Bomb on this. Having or not having a FB account does not make you a more virtuous/ better person.

I've had an account since 2006/07 ish and really enjoy being able to interact with friends all round the world. I do not add anyone I do not know. I do not add anyone I am currently working with and every so often I have a cull of "friends".

The only time I have had to delete a "friend" because of their actions was when someone wrote an unprovoked status/ rant about a good friend of mine. It was deeply offensive and something that he would have said in the pub after a few beers. Anyway I decided that I didn't want to read such abuse so quietly deleted him. I ran in to him in person a while later and he asked me about it. I explained my reason and we bought another round of drinks and no harm done.

Cherry_Bomb

lostinrates wrote: »

I am not clear. Are you saying that people who have Facebook are better people because they are not prehistoric back in the day types?

Fwiw, I agree it's the people using it, or the way people use it. But you could say the same about guns, which many people hate.

And I am a prehistoric type, I don't have Facebook. Tried for about half an hour once and decided it wasn't for me, though it was funny looking up people I have dropped out of contact with. I can see what a great tool it could be, but it's not one I care to use ATM.

Of course I'm not saying that! It's those who come across as though they are somehow a better person because they don't have or no longer use Facebook, Twitter, Bebo etc that my comments were aimed at

''Facebook in my opinion is for people who still think they are kids"
"It's a pathetic place"
"Facebook is the mother of all evil"
"I prefer talking to people in real life" well some of the post counts people have on here I really would beg to differ on that one

My favourite so far is
"I deleted it a couple of weeks ago and it was such a relief"

I mean really! A relief??? I paid off my CC a few months ago. THAT was a relief. Running in the door when you've been stuck in the car for hours bursting for the toilet. THAT is a relief. Getting up the in the morning thinking you've run out of milk and finding out actually you've got just enough left for that life saving first cuppa. THAT is a relief.

The best part is commenting how much you hate it then saying "well I do have an account but its only for such and such" as though they are justifying themselves to the non-users amongst us.

sportbeth

marisco wrote: »

In answer to your question, no I dont have friends like you describe. I wouldn't mix with such people, they sound beyond childish. Lets face it, with friends like that you dont need any enemies do you!

You are an adult OP, so if you choose to remove someone from your facebook account that is your prerogative. From what you advise us, this person you wished to disassociate yourself from, was not being pleasant about you or supportive toward you.

For another friend to take such offense and treat you badly is unecessary. What type of woman goes around effectively saying 'if you wont be nice to xxxx you cant come to my house or to my parties'. That carry on is left behind in school playgrounds by most of us. I work with more mature seven year olds.

Do yourself a huge favour and find a better group of friends. The ones you have sound like pains in the @rse.

Thank you all for your responses so far. I agree with the people who think this is six of one and half a dozen of the other! But honestly, my theory on the original deletion if someone was to distance myself from someone who was watching what I was doing online and then using it as gossip fodder!

The Facebook debate is interesting! I'm one of those people who has a select group of friends that I trust and engage with online, the sort of people who view Facebook as a lighthearted way of catching up and in a humorous way talk about thoughts that they have, uploading and sharing funny pictures and telling funny anecdotes about their kids, their job or their holidays. I've deliberately avoided the people who rant or show off about their lives because its a negative way of using the site.

I "like" a few humorous groups as well. "Mattresses of Walthamstow" is hilarious if anyone has the time to check it out! But that's the extent of my use. It's 30 minutes a day of train time scrolling for me.

This is why I don't understand how a woman who has known me for 4 years, has sought my counsel about her problems, cried on my shoulder (and me on hers, I'm not perfect!) could use this as such an example of how to get involved with somebody else's life and/or argument! I referenced freedom of speech at the time 2 years ago and said that I should have the choice of who I choose to speak to, and that includes on social media.

For the record, at the time (Xmas eve) I did phone the other woman who had been deleted and asked her to talk to me and she refused to take my call. She then sent me a text saying "your behaviour towards me is utterly abhorrent". And apparently by that time she had the agreement of the "pack" of women in the room so I chose to let the debate lie and walked away. A total exaggeration of the circumstances if you ask me but you can see how the hysteria set in with a bunch of women sat round discussing my actions!

I think my true grievance in this is how I was left to look like the bad guy with no opportunity to speak for myself and now it's been blown out of proportion. But I have other friends, and fabulous ones. So I should just move on safe in the knowledge that I have tried to explain and some people don't want to hear it. Because they prefer the drama.......

yvonne13_2

OP I think this is a great lesson for most of us, we don't really know our friends until we see how they act when they do something to us we don't like.

pimento

tara747 wrote: »

Start a new account with a slightly different name or nickname. Don't put your photo as profile pic. Let those you do want to keep in touch with know about the new account, use as normal with photos etc (and high provacy settings!).

Leave your old account dormant. That way, you don't have to 'defriend' anyone and if any nosy parker remarks that you haven't been on FB in ages, just say that you're really busy

Easy.

Make sure you use a different email address.

I don't defriend people, I block them. That way they can't find you and won't necessarily know if you've left Facebook.

Money_maker

sportbeth wrote: »

This is why I don't understand how a woman who has known me for 4 years

Thats an amazingly short amount of time to know a best friend.