Help during maternity leave?

haras_nosirrah

so would you have put your children into daycare at 6 weeks old if your wife hadn't been a high earner so you both had to work or would you never have had your children at all? I asked how long your partner had off work after giving birth not how long you had off - It is very hard to carry a child for 9 months, give birth and then hand them over to someone else before your stitches have even healed so you can go back to work.

FBaby

Orville wrote: »

You just don't get it do you..?

I think I do

Orville

haras_nosirrah wrote: »

so would you have put your children into daycare at 6 weeks old if your wife hadn't been a high earner so you both had to work or would you never have had your children at all? I asked how long your partner had off work after giving birth not how long you had off - It is very hard to carry a child for 9 months, give birth and then hand them over to someone else so you can go back to work.

She wasn't working then, i was. If we were both working, had the child and could not afford for her to be off for 9 months, i know for a fact that she is the type of woman who would have gone straight back to work.

I can never understand the hard to carry a child bit etc for 9 months as i am a guy and will never do that. Dosen't mean that i don't sympathise) That aside though would you really as a mother want to bring a child into this world knowing your going to be going into poverty all because you want 9 months maternity..? Surely you would want to do the best and if that meant going back to work you would do it..?

Orville

FBaby wrote: »

I think I do

That's right you think. Your thinking wrong, as you seem to forget i still work and has been said if i get a full-time job the course will be transferred to evenings which will take longer.

Sit back for 5 and i'm sure you will have your 'light bulb moment' ( eventually).

haras_nosirrah

Orville wrote: »

Well when we lived on the isle of wight i was unemployed for a number of years, infact my now ex was a high earner and we could afford for one of us not to work. I raised the kids 3 of them till the youngest went to school.

So if your ex also wasn't working then the above makes no sense

FBaby

Orville wrote: »

Fbaby, you asked a question about what i would do with my college course if i found full-time work. Well it's a welding course which can be transferred to evenings if that did happen. The only downside is that it will take longer to complete.

What a different view than the one you gave on the other thread

I myself work 20hrs am a full-time parent, plan to go back to college this coming year and would still happily work more hrs. However i am worried that i maybe forced to give up my course in favour of finding work to meet the criteria of 35 hrs. I read somewhere that people with children between 5 and 13 i think are only going to be expected to find work within school hrs. If i am forced to do this, how can i go to college?.

If you have to give up college because you are made to work 35 hours, you will just have to get on with it within whinging then won't you

Orville

haras_nosirrah wrote: »

So if your ex also wasn't working then the above makes no sense

Sorry when she had the child we lived in Sutton, i went out and worked. Her parents wanted to retire over to the isle of wight. Because sutton was getting a bit rough and her ex b/f lived there and wouldn't leave her alone we decided to move over. Before we moved though, we both kept applying for jobs. The first one who got a job would work and the other would raise the kids. She got a job first as an accountant so we moved and i took on the children till the youngest went to school. I ten got the job and was lucky to get nights, that way one of us was always with the kids.

Orville

FBaby wrote: »

What a different view than the one you gave on the other thread



If you have to give up college because you are made to work 35 hours, you will just have to get on with it within whinging then won't you

Yes i have since been told that i can transfer onto nights, so it isn't a problem.

But as i said if i got a full time job before i knew that i would have had to give up the course as far as i was aware and yeah tough you know what's that's life, wouldn't like it but would have accepted it.

FBaby

Orville wrote: »

Yes i have since been told that i can transfer onto nights, so it isn't a problem.

So not so much a full-time single dad, I assume your parents looks after your son mornings at the moment, and would be able to do so at nights too.

But as i said if i got a full time job before i knew that i would have had to give up the course as far as i was aware and yeah tough you know what's that's life, wouldn't like it but would have accepted it.

But still worrying you, like the OP really?

mumps

I think it is awful that mothers have to go to work six weeks after having a baby. If any of my children were in that position I would pay some bills for them so that my DD or DDIL could stay at home for at least 9 months, preferably a year. I know I am lucky to be able to do that. I have brought four up and have always worked but took my full maternity leave everytime. I also saved holiday so that I could tack that on as well. Nine months off doesn't seem alot to ask in my opinion.