How do we pay for our wedding without more debt!!? HELP.

iolanthe07

Apart from a basic Registry Office ceremony, Church weddings are generally the least expensive these days.

pheonixrising21

arbroath_lass wrote: »

Cancel the photographer. Wedding albums get looked at a few times and then put away. Ask your friends to take loads of photos - far less formal.

We did this for our wedding last September. Instead of a photographer (£500 minimum!), we sent a CD out with every invitation (<£20) and asked all our guests to be our photographers.

Guests always take photographs anyway and we've had over 1000 images back now. Granted, some aren't very good, but every single CD we have had back has at least 10 "album quality" pictures on it (about 300-350 in total), from loads of different angles. Some of our guests even brought their laptops with them and burnt the CDs for us the following morning and left them at the hotel reception, so we had pictures straight away!

Some of the pictures are fantastic, so different from the ones that a professional would take as they are candid. Its the best thing we did.

Also, for the more "staged/posed" pics (signing the register, cutting the cake, etc), it gives a bit of a "red carpet" feel as you have loads of cameras going off!

downhiller

When we were getting married the planning was ridiculous and plenty of talk of £20k+ costs.

We then decided !!!!!! what everyone else expects, got married in secret with about 14 guests and the total cost was around £3k.

I know I'm not impartial, but it was by far the best wedding I've ever been too.

Do it. You know it makes sense.

mhmmhm

My wedding cost under £1000 - registry office, some drinks, nice meal just the two of us, rings & outfits. Perfect day - wouldn't have changed it for the world.

You don't HAVE to have a £8k wedding.

meer53

This ^ My wedding cost less than £1000. Registry office, family party in local Community Centre a week later. (We didn't tell anyone we were getting married !)

We did it for us, not for anyone else, we just wanted to get married. It doesn't have to cost a fortune.

We split up after 24 years together. It must be so annoying if you spend thousands on a wedding and get into debt if that happens !

Not saying this will happen to you OP, but you can get married for much less than 8K.

andygb

stephane wrote: »

A sorry but you're wrong....I'd rather give some money than something that will stay in a cupboard or in the bin.....
In France giving money to the Bride & Groom is common practice...I went to a wedding last year and instead of having silly present they requested money to pay for a new kitchen....well I'd rather do that and think I have contributed to something useful...

Not just France, but many countries, where cash is seen as a far more useful contribution to set the couple on their way.
I would add that the OP needs to have a word with her OH and get him to scale down his ideas a little, swallow his pride and recognise that they are in a sticky situation.
You should always try to live within your means, it makes you happier in the end, and is better than sitting their in a few years time, still with large debts, wondering why you put yourself through it all just for one day.

honey10

With regards the photographer, we did what Pheonix did, and we also put disposables on each table, some lovely photos, and I really don't see the point of spending so much on a professional, if you are struggling.

On the money for presents thing, we ordered some little cards from eBay with a poem on, that in a nice way said, we've got a toaster, cash would be great, and most people gave us cash or vouchers.

For your food, I think £13 a head is expensive, could you not do it yourself? In part or the whole thing?

_Andy_

First world problems

thehappybutterfly

I think it's madness to get into debt and worry yourself sick over a wedding. And to be considering taking out a loan purely because of someone's pride?! Your soon to be hubby will worry himself into an early grave at that rate. Wouldn't you rather start your married life debt and worry free? You could celebrate your five year anniversary with a huge plush do for family and friends - when you can afford it.

If it were me, I would cancel the wedding, marry at the Registrars (I got married at Gretna!) and use the money to go on holiday and celebrate the beginning of your married life.

Even my sister, as flashy as she is with money, refused to spend a fortune and chose instead to have a quiet affair in their favourite hotel, just the two of them, and they spent the money on their new house. And my sister is paranoid about doing the right thing. And she did. The right thing for them, not the rest of the family.

securityguy

meer53 wrote: »

This ^ My wedding cost less than £1000. Registry office, family party in local Community Centre a week later

This. Register office, quiet lunch afterwards. We used, effectively, that month's discretionary spend.